Well, I suppose it’s a good thing that the first (and probably last) season of “Miss Advised” has come to an end, as the show has been giving me nightmares! Last night, after watching the finale, I dreamt that I totally Julia Allison-ed at work today. That is to say, I overslept, missed all of my deadlines, and generally made a mockery of all the opportunities that have been given to me. I woke up in a panic at 6 a.m., when I immediately began writing this recap. I shall not become that which I mock! (FYI, feel free to use “Julia Allison” as a verb — in addition to the context in which I used it, “To Julia Allison” can also mean “to act like a lunatic on a date,” i.e. “Ugh, I totally Julia Allison-ed on my date last night with Greg — I got drunk and begged him to kiss me!”) Keep reading »
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Before I get into parsing the insanity of “Miss Advised”‘s penultimate episode, a note about Emily Morse. Last night, as I was livetweeting all the action — I am so dedicated, y’all — I noted that I use Emily’s scenes as time to refill my drink (multiple are necessary to get through this shitshow) or pee. Emily herself replied to me, not understanding why. I explained that she is awesome and rad and normal and unless she shares scenes with someone not awesome and rad and normal (like Alan Busey), I simply do not find her entertaining enough to watch (or blog about, save this wee paragraph), and that is the biggest compliment I can give. Really, “Miss Advised” is a dating show about two mental cases and an adorable pocket person. Love the adorable pocket person, just not enough to waste much valuable blog space on. Anyway … shall we begin? Keep reading »
Truly “Miss Advised”: Prom Dates, Awkward Breakups, A Boring Dinner Party & 10 Million Signs That He’s Just Not That Into You
Oh. holy shit, where to begin. “Miss Advised,” the show about two mentally unstable shitbirds and one relatively cool chick who is probably wondering how she got roped into this mess. Well, I missed recapping last week’s episode because of our malware disaster and also I couldn’t make clips of the show because the sound was missing from our clip-making service, blah blah, Mercury Retrograde, blah blah. But I am back, bitches, with a double recap. Because I love you. And also the crazy from last week’s episode and this week’s was too epic to ignore. Shall we begin? Keep reading »
Ohhhhhhh, last night’s episode of “Miss Advised” was so epically cringe-worthy that I have practically clipped the entire thing (shh, don’t tell Bravo!). And it wasn’t just Julia Allison who was providing the LULZ; Amy was fantastically bunny-boiling and Emily, who I actually think is quite likable, introduced a new friend, Polyamorous Kissing Sexpert Reid. All in all, the episode had me hiding behind a pillow, that’s how good it was. Let the crazy begin! Keep reading »
I watched last night’s episode of “Miss Advised” from the American Airlines terminal bar at San Francisco’s airport while tossing back three glasses of prosecco before my red eye flight. It was really quite perfect. I had been looking forward to this episode, in as much as it’s possible to look forward to an episode of “Miss Advised,” because previews indicated it would feature Julia Allison reading her hate site in the company of a love coach named Annie Lala. As a regular reader of that hate site — Reblogging Donk, read it, it’s hilarious — I was eager to see how it would be presented and how it would fit into Julia’s storyline. Keep reading »
Oh, where to begin, where to begin? “Miss Advised,” Bravo’s new show about dating experts who don’t actually know anything about dating, started episode two with good news for unemployed dating columnist Julia Allison — she’s been “offered” a “job” “writing” for Elle! After working as a “journalist” for 10 years, this is her dream job! What luck! What’s not mentioned, of course, is that her “job” with Elle was arranged for her by Bravo. Duh, whatever, the arrangement is exposure for Elle so I can’t hate on anyone for pulling strings. Except that even a fake-ish gig is too much for Julia Allison to handle, who breaks down in tears after her totally cringe-worthy call with her new editor, who requested that she come up with some ideas for her column. The stress and fear that she might fail is too much. Why did her mom have to set such high expectations for success by being a speech writer for Nixon? Keep reading »
Full (super long) disclosure: I went into watching the debut episode of “Miss Advised,” Bravo’s latest reality show about three “dating experts” who are unlucky in love, already not a fan of Julia Allison, one of the program’s three stars. Allison, for those of you lucky enough to have gone this long without knowing her, is a bit of an internet celebrity; she was “discovered” by Gawker, so to speak, became a dating columnist for Time Out New York, and spent years blogging the details of her personal life on the web. During that time, she developed a pretty large contingent of “haters” (well, large considering her fame, up until now, has been relegated to the internet) who find her various antics narcissistic, unhinged, and manipulative, if entertaining. (In short, she’s kind of the perfect person to cast on a Bravo reality show, where she’ll fit right in with Ramona Singer, Danielle Staub, and Teresa Giudice.) Those alleged antics have been detailed in depth on a site called Reblogging Donk which, for the sake of complete transparency as I embark on a weekly recap of “Miss Advised,” I read quite frequently (it’s really funny!) and, on very rare occasions, comment.
All that being said, despite my well-established distaste for Julia Allison, I thought it was possible I might actually find something to like about her or root for. After all, I love unhinged, manipulative and narcissistic when it’s on my TV screen — remember how hard I rooted for Courtney on “The Bachelor”? So, did Julia manage to show me — and those who already very familiar with her schtick — a different side of herself on the show’s premiere? And, oh yeah, what about the other two relationship experts, Amy Laurent and Emily Morse? How did they do? Let’s get started! Keep reading »
The Soapbox: A Response To Julia Allison’s Op-Ed Addressed To Women Moving To NYC, From A Woman Who Once Moved To NYC
This weekend, The New York Post printed an op-ed titled “A warning to a new generation of women — don’t let ‘Sex and the City’ ruin your life,” written by “internet celebrity” Julia Allison and her friend Julia Price. At first I was like “huh,” and then I skimmed it and was like “UGH,” and then I read it and found it all sorts of horrifying and insulting and wrong.
The overall problem I find with their open letter to “women” — besides the fact that it’s referencing a TV show that ended eight years ago about women twice the age of most college grads — is that it speaks to a demographic I hardly ever encountered in NYC. Are there tube-top dress wearing, Pink Elephant frequenting, banker-flirting women in NY? Sure. Are most of the women living/moving to the city only interested in those things? NO. So please allow me to speak to the rest of the female population who might also feel slighted or offended by the Julias’ out-of-touch words of “wisdom.” Keep reading »