Tag Archives: john mayer

Quotable: John Mayer Was Addicted To Sex With Jessica Simpson

jessica simpson and john mayer photo

“And drugs aren’t good for you if you do lots of them. Yeah, that girl is like crack cocaine to me … Sexually it was crazy. That’s all I’ll say … It was like napalm, sexual napalm. Did you ever say, ‘I want to quit my life and just f**kin’ snort you? If you charged me $10,000 to f**k you, I would start selling all my s**t just to keep f**king you’?”

John Mayer continues to kiss and tell in the March issue of Playboy. He didn’t share any sexual details about Jennifer Aniston, though. Does that mean she sucked in bed or does he have more respect for her? [Us Weekly] Keep reading »

An Open Letter To Taylor Swift

Dear Taylor,

I am writing to offer you some unsolicited advice. I heard that rumor about you and ass hat, John Mayer. Whether you are actually dating him or not (I really hope it’s just a rumor), I would like to point out that it’s a really bad idea to get involved/remain involved with him. Why? You are fresh meat; he is tainted meat. By scientific principle, tainted meat destroys fresh meat if they come within close proximity. See: E. coli. Taylor, I know from experience that bad boys will poison your life. Before you defend your feelings for Mr. Mayer, please hear me out. [Celebitchy]

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10 Celebs Who Are Proud Masturbators

Proud Celeb Masturbators

Anna Kendrick really loved Ryan Gosling’s performance in the movie “Gangster Squad.” More specifically, his performance made her love herself. 

“Ugh – NEVER going to a Ryan Gosling movie in a theater again. Apparently masturbating in the back row is still considered ‘inappropriate,’” she Tweeted. 

We suspect she was joking, but we can’t blame her if she wasn’t. Obviously, Ryan Gosling is a very popular figure in peoples’ spank banks over here. [Daily Mail UK]

 Anna Kendrick is hardly the only celeb to discuss diddling. Woody Allen and Dudley Moore have some of the more famous and funny quotes about jerking off, but some more recent stars have mouthed off about self-love too. Keep clicking to find out who …

Quotable: John Mayer Has An Existential Dating Crisis

“All I want to do now is f**k the girls I’ve already f**ked, because I can’t fathom explaining myself to somebody who can’t believe I’d be interested in them. I’m too freaked out to meet anybody else. I met a girl one time in Vegas. Her name was Dimples, and the ‘s’ in Dimples was a dollar sign. I have this weird feeling, a pride thing, for the people I’ve had relationships with. I still feel like I’m with them, in the sense that if I f**ked Dimples, what does that say about someone like Jen? I feel like it’s all connected. How could I ever cosmically relate these two people? What would I be saying to Jen, who I think is f**king fantastic, if I said to her, ‘I don’t dislike you. In fact, I like you extremely well. But I have to back out of this because it doesn’t arc over the horizon. This is not where I see myself for the rest of my life, this is not my ideal destiny,’ and then I see myself f**king Dimples? What does that say for my case?”

— John Mayer explaining to Rolling Stone magazine that the only thing that keeps him from effing every woman he meets is worrying about how Jen (Aniston) would feel about it. [via US Weekly] Keep reading »

Quotable: John Mayer To Give Up Dating For “A While”

“I’m a little freaked out about dating. So, I’m just going to let time pass and just do my thing. For some reason whoever I date has been famous for a while. I can’t sit here and be like, ‘Oh, please let me live my life in private with this famous person who’s been around for 15 years.’ The last thing you want is to see me doing is bashing my head going, ‘I’m shocked, that I’m being followed right now.’ … I’m just going to hunker down. 2010 is a peaceful year for me no matter what I do.”

—Notorious playboy John Mayer tells Ellen DeGeneres his immediate dating plans on the set of her show yesterday. You may remember some of his famous exes include: Jennifer Aniston, Jessica Simpson, Minka Kelly and Jennifer Love Hewitt. Actually, John, bashing your head really isn’t the last thing we want to see you doing. Keep reading »

Quickies: Lindsay Lohan Is Going After John Mayer & The Porn Money Wedding

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