When John Mayer’s supremely ignorant Playboy interview hit the wires, I, like most people, was appalled. Not just by his idiotic racism, but by the way he spoke about his exes. I mean, the dude compared Jessica Simpson to crack! Said she was like “sexual napalm!” What a jerk! I mean, how indiscreet!
I watched Jessica Simpson tell Oprah that no, she hadn’t forgiven him for his big fat mouth and was disappointed that he’d sunk so low. I harrumphed, “You go, Jessica!” as I high-fived my TV screen.
Then I recalled how many times I’d blabbed about exes. I’ve been writing about relationships, often my own, for the past 10 years. In that time, I’ve done some serious dishing—and dissing. The truth is, most of my recountings were far less flattering than what John had to say about Jessica.
My name is Judy and I am a hypocrite. Keep reading »
On yesterday’s episode of “Oprah,” Jessica Simpson
responded for the first time to John Mayer
‘s blabbermouth statement to Playboy
— that she’s like crack in the sack. He, for the record, apologized to her in writing
(email or text, we wonder) and she has not and doesn’t plan on accepting it. Good for her! After all the rumors about Jessica still pining away for Mayer, it’s nice to see her standing up for herself, but also seeming disinterested in his smarmy ass. Keep reading »
“Do you ever feel like spite hate f***ing @johncmayer just to put hi in his place, hes a better guitarist than me but not better in bed ! but like say your [sic] f***ing @johncmayer totally throwing him around the room in bits and then you just BAM punch him in the face? good times”
— Courtney Love, only about two weeks behind the rest of us, seems to have finally read — or at least heard about — John Mayer’s recent Playboy interview where he likens Jessica Simpson to sexual napalm and calls his dick a white supremacist. Love took to Twitter to share her own comments about Mayer. No word yet on whether Mayer is interested in taking her up on her “offer.” Now that might be a match made in heaven. [via Huffington Post] Keep reading »
Yesterday, we reported some off-color remarks John Mayer made about Jessica Simpson in Playboy. Jessica could have taken his comparison of her to “sexual napalm” positively or negatively, depending on how she felt about herself and their relationship. But his musings about black women and use of the N-word weren’t as clever as he hoped, but cemented his status as the biggest jerk with a mic. Let’s dissect what he said and how he tried to apologize, after the jump. Keep reading »
Won’t he ever shut up? Not yet! After his controversial interview
came out yesterday, John Mayer broke down on stage and said a bunch of stuff that maybe was an apology? It sounded like more masturbation if you ask me. And we know how much he likes that. Clip above. [via YouTube
Keep reading »
John Mayer, I call bulls**t. In a recent interview with Playboy, the oversharing singer had this to say about his ex, Jessica Simpson:
Yeah, that girl is like crack cocaine to me… Sexually it was crazy. That’s all I’ll say. It was like napalm, sexual napalm …
Have you ever been with a girl who made you want to quit the rest of your life? Did you ever say, “I want to quit my life and just f**kin’ snort you? If you charged me $10,000 to f**k you, I would start selling all my shit just to keep f**king you.”
I’m sorry, but there is NO WAY Jessica Simpson is that good in bed. Keep reading »
“And drugs aren’t good for you if you do lots of them. Yeah, that girl is like crack cocaine to me … Sexually it was crazy. That’s all I’ll say … It was like napalm, sexual napalm. Did you ever say, ‘I want to quit my life and just f**kin’ snort you? If you charged me $10,000 to f**k you, I would start selling all my s**t just to keep f**king you’?”
– John Mayer continues to kiss and tell in the March issue of Playboy. He didn’t share any sexual details about Jennifer Aniston, though. Does that mean she sucked in bed or does he have more respect for her? [Us Weekly] Keep reading »
I am writing to offer you some unsolicited advice. I heard that rumor about you and ass hat, John Mayer. Whether you are actually dating him or not (I really hope it’s just a rumor), I would like to point out that it’s a really bad idea to get involved/remain involved with him. Why? You are fresh meat; he is tainted meat. By scientific principle, tainted meat destroys fresh meat if they come within close proximity. See: E. coli. Taylor, I know from experience that bad boys will poison your life. Before you defend your feelings for Mr. Mayer, please hear me out. [Celebitchy]
Keep reading »
Anna Kendrick really loved Ryan Gosling’s performance in the movie “Gangster Squad.” More specifically, his performance made her love herself.
“Ugh – NEVER going to a Ryan Gosling movie in a theater again. Apparently masturbating in the back row is still considered ‘inappropriate,’” she Tweeted.
We suspect she was joking, but we can’t blame her if she wasn’t. Obviously, Ryan Gosling is a very popular figure in peoples’ spank banks over here. [Daily Mail UK]
Anna Kendrick is hardly the only celeb to discuss diddling. Woody Allen and Dudley Moore have some of the more famous and funny quotes about jerking off, but some more recent stars have mouthed off about self-love too. Keep clicking to find out who …