By now you’ve probably heard about how Justin Timberlake sang his new bride Jessica Biel down the aisle with a special song. That’s really nice and all, but we think it would have been so much more hilarious if he had sang one of his classic songs instead. After all, Justin and Jessica are total jokesters — a couple of their friends recorded a video featuring homeless people around Los Angeles wishing the couple well — hilarious! So we’ve compiled a list of wedding song alternatives.
Like, for instance: Keep reading »
Hey-o! Justin Timberlake is really excited to be married to Jessica Biel! Here he is jumping for joy on the cover of People magazine, which paid the couple a handsome $300K for the exclusive wedding album (on stands Friday). Now, what do we think of Jessica’s frothy pink dress? I happen to think it’s too pink, though I’m totally a fan of non-white wedding gowns. Also, nice photobomb, Britney! [People]
What is up with Jessica Biel today, guys? She is wearing every kind of trend at once. Colored leather, studded leather, a weird peasant top? Did she switch stylists? Join a lesbian biker gang? Pick up a side job as a Michael Jackson impersonator? What’s the deal, Biel? [Photo: WENN]
Finally, a major positive improvement on the fringe front! Jessica Biel trimmed up her sheepdog bangs into something shorter and choppier, and they look infinitely better. Was this mod, ’60s-ish vibe what she was going for all along? It’s very Jane Birkin and, as with all things Birkin-esque, I strongly approve … and she looks pretty psyched about it as well, no? Lots of success on the outfit front, too! Looking good, Jessica, looking good. [Photo: Will Alexander/WENN.com]
Let’s start with the good: Jessica Biel‘s subtle, glowy makeup at the NYC “Total Recall” premiere is gorgeous and ethereal, her hair is as close to perfection as it can get with the distracting fringe, love the reptile pumps, and that ring must have cost a grand heap of “Sexy Back” royalties. This look almost — almost — gets it so right, but she had to go and make a goddamn travesty of a lovely dress by throwing on an inexplicable matching lace cape! Whyyyyy, Jessica? Did JT insist? Are you taking a page out of Natalie‘s book and getting married beneath a chuppah directly after the premiere, which would explain the need for covered shoulders? Were you just cold? How cold? Was Colin Farrell cold, too? Do tell.
Tuesday night, Jessica Biel and Kate Beckinsale showed up for the premiere of their new movie, “Total Recall.” I say new movie, but it’s really a redux of the ’90s classic, which starred Arnold Schwarzeneggar. Several of my friends are “Total Recall” purists, and refuse to see the new one, but whatever, it stars Colin Ferrell, and he’s great. What’s not so great? Jessica Biel’s pocketful Christian Dior dress. It’s slightly boxy, and the retro shape doesn’t really work on her. Plus? There are weird pockets on the boobs, which I suppose are great if you’re constantly losing your keys or something, but they just add to the wrongness of this silhouette. Kate Beckinsale, though? She looks incredible in this snake print-y Armani Privé. Total Hollywood glamor. Yup Jessica, let Kate show you how it’s done.