Jason Segel is smart, sexy, and single! “I Love You, Man,” his bromantic comedy with the universally beloved Paul Rudd, is in theaters this weekend. Here are ten reasons to love Mr. Segel, including, yes, his penis.

Paul Rudd and Jason Segal’s “I Love You, Man” opens on today, and Forbes says this breed of male comic duos are “more enlightened” and “less homophobic” than predecessors like Laurel and Hardy. Why do people pretend men weren’t friends before the “bromance” phenomenon? You think Jesus didn’t love his disciples? Those men were crazy emo. And “The Odd Couple”? Totes loved each other. Here’s who we’d shun, shag and marry…

Picture for a moment, if you will, the opening sequence of a film. A romantic comedy. Close, on the female lead, she stands in her apartment a puzzled look on her face – darn it! She wants love! Dating is hilarious! Sex is hilarious! People chase other people through airports and make embarrassing speeches at corporate functions all in the name of L-O-V-E. This female lead is unemployed. She is a slacker. She’s uncertain what she wants to do with her life, but she is certain that she’s ten to fifteen pounds overweight. She engages in recreational drug use, sometimes even drinking bong water. She fears change and cries at the drop of a hat. But boy is she lovable!

Yesterday we posted a review of Forgetting Sarah Marshall, a movie which has an R-rating despite the fact that there’s a whole lotta peen to be seen. Apparently, the film was able to avoid an NC-17 rating because the ratings board told the filmmakers that star Jason Segal’s penis would have to remain flaccid during the scene in which it’s exposed—an erect penis would have garnered an NC-17 rating. We’re not quite sure why a shriveled penis is less “offensive” than a hard one. Is it because a hard penis implies sexual arousal and THAT is what is inappropriate for children under 17? Segal says that in order to comply with the board’s standards, while still not embarrassing himself on a celluloid with a cold and shriveled package, he went for just slightly engorged. We asked our friend Jon how he would do such a thing, and Jon said that he probably got himself aroused and then let his boner subside a bit before filming began, getting that “meaty” effect. We swear, we have not learned so much about penises in our entire life as we have in the last two days. Anyway, what do you think about how this movie is rated? Do you think it’s strange that the film ratings board makes such a, um, stiff distinction between the two?

Forgetting Sarah Marshall
Starring Jason Segel, Mila Kunis, Kristen Bell
Okay, ladies this is a very special addition of “We See Chick Flicks”. Both because I loved, loved, loved this movie and for the PENIS factor. Yup, you’ve probably heard about it, and maybe some of you have already seen it, but this movie is very, how shall I put it, frontally loaded. And we’re not talking a little peek, we’re talking the WHOLE pecker (and might we add, the 6-foot-something actor shows his…height). We’re talking full view, slightly hard schlong. Most movies who deign to show the whole male form, wimp out with a little glimpse of the turtle head, but Jason worked hard (pun intended) to show us his full potential. While getting fully hard would have warranted an X-rating, he got right up to that point, a point which we will refer to as “getting long” [Meaty!—Editor], and let me tell you, he’s got nothing to be ashamed of. Now. Moving on.

I am so excited to see Forgetting Sarah Marshall, especially since the star, Jason Segal (who also stars on How I Met Your Mother), has an entire scene in full-frontal exposure. He’s hot, in a funny, goofy guy sort of way.