Tag Archives: insecurity

Fitness Vlogger John David Glaude Bravely Bares His Loose Skin

Seriously, That Takes A Lot Of Courage

Fitness vlogger John David Glaude of the YouTube channel Obese to Beast has lost 160 pounds since he started getting into fitness, and that’s come with a side effect he didn’t originally expect: A lot of loose skin. It’s a predictable result of extreme weight loss, but not one that’s been well-documented in American culture.

Glaude wanted to do his part to change that, so this weekend he posted a vlog titled “My Biggest Insecurity: Loose Skin.” In it, he demonstrates some of the ways he creates the illusion of not having loose skin, and shows the areas of his body that were the most effected by the extreme weight loss – his arms, chest, stomach, and thighs. You can hear an anxiety in his voice that isn’t present in his other videos while he’s undressing and explaining how he hides the skin, what he does to feel comfortable in public, and how he’s felt about the way his body looks unclothed. Keep reading »

Oh Yeah, Well I: 5 Ways To Deal With A Serial Upstager

Have you ever dealt with a serial upstager? A one-upping, attention-grabbing, spotlight-stealing individual who never quits? Have you forgotten what it feels like to tell a story about work/the crazy man outside of your apartment/that time you were in Africa teaching kids to read and write/anything in its entirety? Have you’ve become all too comfortable sitting on the sidelines during family gatherings while this individual entertains aunts and uncles with tales of her days spent disciplining inner-city kids that are so absurd they definitely border on the untrue? Well, I have. And if you have, too … you know that it really sucks. Keep reading »

Frisky Rant: My Boobs Are Not A Threat To Your Marriage

Frisky Rant: My Boobs Are Not A Threat To Your Marriage

Recently blogger Lauren of Apples and Band-Aids caused an uproar among bloggers when she wrote a post claiming that racy social media images by sexy female strangers were a threat to her marriage. To wit:

When your bare shoulders and stretchmark-less bellies and tanned legs pop up, I not only worry if my husband will linger over your picture. I worry how he will compare me to you.

As I wrap myself into his arms at night, I wonder if he is seeing you there instead of my mess of a body left over from pregnancy. I wonder if he thinks I’m lazy and that I don’t take good care of myself. I wonder if he wishes I looked more like you than who I really am.

And then the insecurity monster comes back to bite at our relationship again … me, begging for affirmation, and him tiring from saying the same thing over and over.

Keep reading »

8 Ways To Combat Your Inner Critic

8 Ways To Combat Your Inner Critic
Better Body Affirmations
Body Image Tips For Teen Girls
Makes these your mantra. Read More »

Whether we notice it or not, we all face the occasional visit of a nagging voice inside our heads that questions whether we’re good enough. You know the one — it turns up when you’re face to face with your ex, putting yourself out there creatively or just looking at yourself in the mirror. That little inner critic can become our own worst enemy and even hold us back from pursuing the things that would make us happiest. The negative running dialogue in our head can sound like came from a bratty girl in a middle school cafeteria — only it never left. Where the hell does it come from? Keep reading »

Dater X: When Exes Intimidate

Dater X: When Exes Intimidate
Dater X: Happily Single
Dater X: What "Happily Single" Means To Me
Just because I'm dating, doesn't mean I'm not happily single. Read More »

It’s been a month to the day since I met Andrew, my surprisingly charming OKCupid run-in who recognized me and introduced himself out at a bar. We’ve been hanging out pretty consistently over the last few weeks, going on dates every few days, and continuing to get to know each other. I can honestly say that the hesitations I had about his height when we first started seeing each other have subsided, and I’ve been able to tap into the real Andrew: his hopes, his dreams, his demons … and unfortunately, his ex-girlfriend.

Andrew and I were talking on the phone one night last week when his most recent ex casually came up in conversation. Without hesitation, I blurted out: “What happened between you two, by the way?” Upon realizing what I’d just asked him, I apologized for my bluntness and told him that I totally understood if he didn’t want to go into the story of his failed relationship. To my surprise, he wasn’t offended at all and gladly told me the tale of their fallout. In a nutshell, after several years of dating, Andrew and his ex moved in together and hit a rough patch when their dynamic completely changed. They went from a happily-in-love duo to bickering strangers in a matter of months. I’ve heard about couples who move in together and pretty quickly realize that they’re not as compatible as they thought, but I’ve never actually known anyone it’s happened to. Apparently, despite all of their efforts to work through their problems, they’d hit a point of no return. He ultimately ended things with her, leaving both of them understandably devastated. Apparently, he’d even set aside money for an engagement ring.

“But that’s the past, and I’m ready for the future now,” he told me. I was so grateful that Andrew felt comfortable enough to open up to me about his ex, and I recognized that my curiosity about it in the first place meant only one thing: I’m really starting to like this guy. But there was one problem… Keep reading »

Life After Dating: You, Me And The Green-Eyed Monster

I remember the very first time that I felt jealous and possessive of my husband. It was back when we were still dating. One weekend, he and his friends did a Bloody Mary bar crawl; I abstained because I’ve never been a big fan of Bloody Marys, but I was happy to look through the pictures Kale posted later that night on Facebook. Between all the tomato juice and the celery sticks, though, I found something I was not happy about: two pictures of him giving big smooches to a female friend on the cheek.

I really liked his female friend. In fact, she’s a friend of mine now, too. But at the time, I didn’t know her well at all and Kale and I were a fairly new couple. All I could see was my boyfriend, who was in love with me, being affectionate with another woman — who happens to be strikingly beautiful, hilarious and smart. I must have turned the brightest shade of emerald green.

I called up one of my girl friend’s to commiserate. Surely she would agree that not only kissing another woman on the cheek but posting the photos on Facebook for all to see was rude at best and troublesome at worst? Grab the pitchforks! Let’s storm the castle together!

But she didn’t say that. She said friends kissing opposite-sex friends on the cheek isn’t a big deal. She and her long-term partner do it all the time.  She said I was overreacting. And, most cuttingly, she said my response to Kale’s photos said more about my insecurity than it did anything about him.  Keep reading »

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