Tag Archives: infomercials

Infomercial Fails Set To The Music Of Morrissey Is A Goth’s Dream Come True

Morrissey-Informercial-Mashup
Your Existential Crisis, In Video Form

When you pair every mundane annoyance in life — from spilled glasses of wine to outrageous foot odor — with The Smiths song, “Please Let Me Get What I Want,” you have achieved the epitome of the goth aesthetic. This video pretty much sums up my whole world view. [Happy Place]

Morrissey: No Meat
No meat at the Staples Center -- or else. Read More »
Morrissey Disses Bowie
He's onto Rick Astley, instead. Read More »
Angsty Youth Of TV
All the goths, punks and club kids on 80's day time talk shows. Watch »

Watch This: World’s Worst Kitchen Gadget Squeezes Out Egg Erections

Make it stop!

Tired of the same old fried or scrambled eggs? Wish you could enjoy your favorite breakfast food in a more phallic shape? Then you should definitely check out a new kitchen gadget called the “Rollie Eggmaster.” Just crack your eggs into the tube-shaped contraption, and a couple minutes later it slowly pushes out a cooked egg boner. According to the infomercial, it’s “perfect for the office!” Lord help us. [YouTube]

Hot Booties: Microwaveable Slippers That Will Not Get You Laid

Pajama Jeans
Pajama Jeans are kind of scary. Watch »
The Forever Lazy
The Forever Lazy makes pajama jeans look harmless. Watch »
Snazzy Napper
The answer to the Snuggie. Watch »
Watch Video

Hot Booties are here, people! They are soooo much more than just slippers. They are pure comfort and therapy for your feet. Just put the Hot Booties in the Booty Bag, pop them in the microwave for 60 seconds and enjoy an hour of moist heat … on your feet. If Hot Booties are indeed a real product, which they appear to be, they are going to look so good with my Pajama Jeans or my Forever Lazy. Oooh! I can probably accessorize with my Snazzy Napper. Just what we need. More products that kill our collective sex drive. [Buzzfeed]

A Really Creepy Way To Eat Your Hot Dog

I already dislike hot dogs, but the Happy Hot Dog Man brings my distaste to a whole new level. These kind of antics are fine for Play-Doh, but not for wieners. I do not want my hot dog to have arms, legs, eyes, the ability to dance, or wear outfits. I have serious concerns about the child (or adult) who complains that the standard hot dog is “not fun enough to eat.” [The Daily What] Keep reading »

I Want A SlobStopper

Oh, how I love infomercials. This one for the “Slobstopper” tries to sell you an oversized bib for $14.95. “Has this ever happened to you?” Actually, no. Please tell me this one is a joke. [Buzzfeed] Keep reading »

Cami Secret Is One They Never Should Have Let Out Of The Box

Behold the Cami Secret! A handkerchief that hooks on to your bra so when you wear a low-cut top, your lecherous male co-workers won’t spontaneously motorboard you. (Ohmigosh, you have that problem too?!) It won’t ruin your clothes with safety pins, and it eliminates the need for those annoying camisoles you have to wear underneath some shirts. In short, this is a bib for your boobs. And guess what! It’s adjustable so that you can slide it up and down to choose how much boob crack you want to show off. Our guess: Cami Secret was invented by a frustrated and disturbed mom with an overly developed teenage daughter. [YouTube] Keep reading »

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