According to the latest issue of In Touch, one drunken eve at the Beverly Hills Hotel, Lindsay Lohan made a list of all 36 of her famous, sexual conquests to impress her friends. Yes, because making a list of all the famous people you’ve fucked is the best way to impress people. An anonymous source who claims to have watched Lilo pen the sex spreadsheet on January 30, 2013 said,”It was her personal conquest list. She was trying to impress her friends with the list and then tossed it aside.” Keep reading »
“I admire her … She saves children’s lives. I get that we both have a lot of kids, but I don’t think I look anything like her,” said Nadya Suleman, better known as Octomom, of her idol Angelina Jolie.
Then Octomom proceeded to pose like her for In Touch. Why? It’s hard to say. But Octomom took the opportunity to talk about how much harder she has it than Ang.
“I do a lot! I’m a cook, a chauffeur and a nanny,” she told In Touch. She forgot porn star, drunk, and possible welfare defrauder. [DListed]
Some very important news in the world of tan-ness: Patricia Krentcil, better known as Tanning Mom, has announced that she will STOP tanning. In an exclusive interview with In Touch, Tanning Mom said that she wants the chance to “rehabilitate her image by staying out of the sun (real and artificial) for an entire month.” While Tanning Mom acknowledges that “nothing is forever,” she knows that she is “sick of talking about tanning.” NOOO! I mean, I’m happy for her potentially pre-cancerous skin, but I want her to keep talking about tanning. I was just starting to understand her and now she’s gone. Sadz. I think she’ll need a hobby while she’s on her tanning hiatus. Something to keep her busy (and me occupied). Some ideas for Tanning Mom after the jump. Keep reading »
Dear In Touch,
Shiloh Jolie-Pitt does not have a crush on Kingston Rossdale. He is not her “first true love.” She is 5 years old. Shiloh is interested in taxidermy and being called “John” and engaging in sword play. She’s basically a little mini-bad ass. Kingston, when he’s not flipping off the paparazzi and getting his nails did, is probably down to look at dead animals and spar with her. It’s called friendship. Can’t a little girl play with a little boy without it being labeled “a crush”? Maybe Kingston has a crush on Shiloh and she’s all, “Nah, bro, not interested. Now engarde!” Consider that.
Tori Spelling’s daughter Stella accessorized with some Magic Marker stains, while Halle Berry’s daughter Nahla toted a stuffed animal for a fab fall look. Did they match their Pull-Ups, too? Like, OMG, who do you think their stylist is?!
In Touch, you know they’re only three-year-olds, right? [SparkAMovement.Tumblr.com]
If you happen to pass a newsstand today and venture by a stack of In Touch magazines, do not worry—no one stole the Palins’ film from a Sears Portrait Studio. No, Sarah and Bristol, along with babies Trig and Tripp, posed for the cutesy cover shot, in which Tripp sticks his fingers in little Trig’s ear. They also invited a reporter into their home for an exclusive interview. Alas, the story is mostly a puff piece where Bristol says groundbreaking things like, “We’re both moms at the same time. It has brought us closer together.” (Side note: If your mom had a baby a year before you and named him “Trig,” wouldn’t you probably have picked something not quite as close as “Tripp”?) Keep reading »
Did you hear? There’s an Angelina Jolie Sex Scandal brewing! In Touch dug up a bunch of “racy” photos from when she was 16 in which she models swimwear. Now, look, I get it that this kind of modeling, when you’re underage can be a little grody, but I’m pretty sure Angie lived in Europe back then and they’re way more tolerant of pre-teen sexuality there. Also, all of the bathing suits she sports are pretty heinous and not especially revealing, at least compared to today’s standards. Above is the video done during the shoot, in which Angelina’s pouty poses were apparently inspired by Marky Mark and The Funky Bunch’s “Good Vibrations”! [DListed] Keep reading »
Paris Hilton, 27, recently lamented to In Touch, “I never got to go to college.” Aw, poor Paris. Couldnâ€™t get student loans or Swarovski just couldn’t rhinestone all those books? But, like an heiress, sheâ€™s found a lucrative and public way to duplicate this rite of passage on a new reality show in which she’ll try to find a new BFF. Paris plans on making up for lost time by filling a mansion with girls so she can have the college experience. â€œThis will be my chance to be in a sorority,â€ she said eagerly. As anyone with a degree knows, â€œsororityâ€ is code for â€œgay until graduation.â€ Maybe she wasn’t just testing the lesbian waters with Elisha Cuthbert back in January. â€œIâ€™m really excited about this concept â€” Iâ€™m going to meet a lot of great girlfriends,â€ said Paris, who will capture all the panty raids on tape for MTV. [In Touch]
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