“I gave a speech recently, an empowerment speech to a gay audience, and it included the line ‘I’ve been straight and I’ve been gay and gay is better.’ They tried to get me to change it, because they said it implies that homosexuality can be a choice. And for me, it is a choice. I understand that for many people, it’s not, but for me, it’s a choice, and you don’t get to define my gayness for me. A certain section of our community is very concerned that it not be seen as a choice, because it doesn’t matter if we flew here or we swam here, it matters that we are here and we are one group and let us stop trying to make a litmus test for who is considered gay and who is not. … Why can’t it be a choice? Why is that any less legitimate? It seems we’re just ceding this point to bigots who are demanding it, and I don’t think that they should define the terms of the debate. I also feel like people think I was walking around in a cloud and I didn’t realize I was gay, which I find really offensive. I find it offensive to me, but I also find it offensive to all the men I’ve been out with.”
– Cynthia Nixon from “Sex and the City” explained her midlife change to lesbianism in this weekend’s New York Times Magazine. Cynthia had been in a relationship with a man for years, with whom she had two children, and after they split, she got into a relationship with a woman, with whom she has had another child through the help of a sperm donor. I guess I don’t understand why people are so obsessed with putting labels on other people’s sex lives (and yes, I am thinking back to the Girl Talk essay we ran recently about a lesbian who enjoys sex with men). Sexuality is a spectrum and it’s complicated and it’s never going to fit into neat and tidy little boxes; people who obsess about who gets to call themselves what are just wasting everyone’s time. I also love what Cynthia said about not letting other people try to “define my gayness for me.” She’s so smart, strong, kickass and awesome. Cynthia Nixon is the kind of celebrity that you wish celebrities in general were more like. [NY Times Magazine]
Forget about “Mexican diet pills.” All Gay Men Don’t Get Fat author Simon Doonan says you need to get rid of that holiday heft is a “marathon of the Ks.” No, he doesn’t even say “Kardashians.” He just says “the Ks.” He’s that gay. [Queerty]
Good news! High school doesn’t always have to suck! Patrick Henry High School in San Diego crowned a lesbian student named Rebeca Arellano as its first homecoming king during the school pep rally and days later, Rebeca’s girlfriend of two years, Haileigh Adams, was crowned homecoming queen. Rebeca was the school’s first female homecoming king, which was especially shocking because the couple said they didn’t plan to run and just ended up getting a lot of positive support from their classmates. So, suck on that, Westboro Baptist Church.
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Lez-be-honest, you know it’s true: over half of all women are attracted to other gals, according to a study at Boise State University of Idaho.
In a poll given to 484 students of varying sexual orientations, 60 percent of the female participants claimed “some level of attraction to other women,” 45 percent had kissed another woman, and 50 percent had fantasized about another woman. This study provides another example of the fluidity of sexuality, rightfully showing its complexity extends beyond a “do you like penis or vagina?” duality. Yet kissing other women, especially in a college/party environment, has been famously glorified by Katy Perry and others, and in some (some!) cases is done to incite attention or pleasure from male onlookers. Likewise, what does attraction mean? Possibilities include everything from the enjoyment of pornography to the appreciation of another woman’s physique or style. (I don’t make these points to contest the study’s results, only to highlight the subjectivity of the findings.) Keep reading »
“Masturbation can be a form of homosexuality because it is a sexual act that does not involve a woman. If a man were to masturbate while engaged in other forms of sexual intimacy with his wife then he would not be doing so in a homosexual way. However, any man who does so without his wife in the room is bordering on homosexuality activity, particularly if he’s watching himself in a mirror and being turned on by his own male body.”
— This is Pastor Mark Driscoll of Seattle’s fundamentalist Mars Hill Church in his no-doubt enlightening brochure “Porn-Again Christian: A Frank Discussion on Pornography & Masturbation for God’s Men.” Anything other than heterosexual sex is “bordering on homosexual activity” because you’re fooling around with someone of the same sex, duh. The logic, it is flawless! Also, I am as gay as a picnic basket on “Queer Eye For The Straight Guy” being filmed in the Castro District during a Judy Garland Convention. [Queerty] Keep reading »
Happy Coming Out Day, everyone. We are sending lots of love to our gay, lesbian, trans, bi, and queer readers! In the spirit of acceptance, we’ve rounded up 14 inspiring coming-out tales from 14 gay and lesbian celebs. And here’s hoping anyone’s impending coming-out is more “Monster Ball” than “Westboro Baptist Church”!