“Meep?” “Meep!” “Meep, meep, meep, meep, meep.” What the heck did I just say? Maybe Beaker’s friend, Dr. Bunsen Honeydew, knows. The principal of Dancers High School in Massachusetts had no idea what the nonsensical Muppet-word meant, either. That old fuddy-duddy threatened his students with suspension after administrators learned of a dastardly plan for a “mass meeping.”

Luckily for everyone’s permanent record, the cacophony of “meeping,” which had been planned online, never happened. But, hey, kids planning a silly “mass meeping” is a hell of a lot better than kids planning a school shooting. Meep, meep! [ABC News]

Depending on what kind of high school you attended and what part of the country you grew up in, you’re probably well aware of school dress codes: no miniskirts, no baseball hats, no gang colors, etc. But some kids who are challenging their dress code aren’t just trying to flash a skimpy thong to get the QB’s attention: they’re trying to express their opposite-sex gender identity. Now, increasingly, high school administrators have to navigate tricky situations and questions, such as What do we do when Bobby comes to school wearing a dress, high-heeled boots and eyeliner?

Last week, 15-year-old Dakota Fanning was crowned the Homecoming Princess of Crespi Carmelite High School after cheering at the game with the other Viking cheerleaders. This is weird for a couple of reasons: because she goes to an actual high school and because she is still only 15. Also, isn’t she too busy being a badass Volturi to be a cheerleader? And aren’t teenagers supposed to resent her for her success? Plus, aren’t they generally called “Homecoming Queens”?

Most celebrities at least claim they were outcasts in high school. Having been a drama geek, I can confirm that this is likely true. But I guess not every path to stardom is paved with struggle. Here are some celebrities who were beloved from day one.  [Just Jared]

Talk about being an overly-involved parent. Last week, mom Carolina McNeal was charged with hacking into a Pennsylvania high school’s computer system to make her daughter come out at the top of her class. Caroline worked as the school’s secretary, and used other people’s passwords to change four years worth of grades, test scores, and SAT scores for her daughter Brittany…even giving her daughter’s classmates crappier grades and scores! McNeal is accused of changing 200 scores and is charged with 29 counts of tampering with public records—third-degree felonies that warrant up to seven years in prison and $15,000 in fines. (For each count…yikes.) Nutso mom got caught when a guidance counselor noticed that Brittany’s SAT score of 1370 was listed as 1730 in the school’s computers…which totally could have just been a dyslexic mix-up, right? Also, 1370 is practically perfect on its own! I guess that’s motherly love to the extreme—doing time so your daughter could get into a good college? But my guess is that Brittany would rather have a mother than good grades.  [Yahoo News]

Chelsea Sarvis, a senior at South Carolina’s Chapin High School, wants to wear pants to her graduation. But according to Principal Mike Satterfield (surprise, surprise, it’s a male), unless she wears a dress, she won’t be attending. That’s right—if she doesn’t conform to what I thought were antiquated stereotypes and flaunt a “feminine” frock, she won’t be able to go to her own graduation.

While some of us may kiss girls and like it, the principal of Van High School in Texas doesn’t even like the idea set to song. Three members of the school spirit twirling team were suspended from performing after they did a routine to Katy Perry’s #1 hit, “I Kissed A Girl”, at a pep rally. WTF?!  What a double standard!  It’s totally cool for high school dance teams to do sexually provocative dance moves in skimpy uniforms to explicit hetero love songs like “Low”, but Katy Perry giggling about a lesbian kiss crosses the line?  “We did have rules in place, and rules were broken and discipline followed,” said Van Independent School District spokesman Suzie McWilliams. Rules or discrimination? Puh-lease, the very uptight Ms. McWilliams needs to get some perspective…perhaps another woman could loosen her up? [NBC via Fark]

Most sexually active teen girls probably live in fear of the day they miss their period, but a group of high schoolers in Massachusetts all decided to get pregnant and raise their babies together—17 of them succeed, and one was even knocked up by a 24-year-old homeless man, according to Gloucester High School’s principal, Joseph Sullivan. Normally there are about four pregnancies at this school of 1,200, which is located in a largely Catholic community. When girls came multiple times to the school clinic for pregnancy tests and seemed more upset if they weren’t pregnant than if they were, the school started asking questions. A girl in the class above the pregnancy pactmakers said she thinks they wanted to have babies because of the unconditional love they believed would come with having a child. “I try to explain it’s hard to feel loved when an infant is screaming to be fed at 3 a.m.,” she said. We smell a Lifetime movie coming out of this. [Time]

An 18-year-old boy in Texas thought he was being all stealth, sneaking into his girlfriend’s house for a surprise hook-up. Instead, he got two black eyes from her father, who thought he was a burglar, and was charged with burglary and assault. The funny part is that his girlfriend (who is 15, by the way) wasn’t even there—she was sleeping over at a friend’s house. Ha. [AHN]

In the past two weeks alone, three female teachers in Tampa, FL, have been arrested for having sex with their students—sadly proving even women can be totally perverted pedophiles. The first bust was a 28-year-old middle school math teacher, Stephanie Regusa, who added a 14-year-old boy, divided his legs, then got herself subtracted from society when police arrested her after they monitored her phone calls to him.  Then, the authorities caught 45-year-old Mary Jo Spack, a high school honors English teacher who bought booze to lure a bunch of students to a private motel room where she was overheard raping a boy in the shower. Finally, a third substitute teacher and married mother of two, Lisa Marinelli, was arrested for having sex with a high schooler. While Marinelli bears a coincidental resemblance to crazy cougar Paula Abdul, weirder still, Tampa was also the city where Debra Lafave (pictured), the beautiful blond teacher that was caught having a relationship with her student, made headlines in 2004. So the score so far is pedophilic female teachers 4, Tampa 0. If you have a son, stay the hell away from the Sunshine State! [KNBC]

Teenage boys might not be the hormone-crazed sex junkies (or wannabe sex junkies) many assume them to be. A report published this month in the Journal of Adolescence says that most of the 10th-grade boys surveyed noted their main reason for dating someone was “I really liked the person.” And then they grow up.  [NY Times]

Saying that last night’s episode of Gossip Girl was drama-filled is like declaring that shoes will get wet when it rains. Duh. Along with the Serena/Blair pregnancy scare and Nate and Chuck duking it out, there was the somewhat less climactic storyline in which Dan says, “I love you” to Serena. The first time he says it is when he wants to show support in case she’s carrying a little Dan. But he really means it and wants her to know that it isn’t solely because of this. He spends the rest of the episode trying to tell her again.

The interesting part of this story is not that they exchange those three words, but that they do it after they have sex! Maybe things have changed since we were in high school, but back then, couples “went out” for months and months, said “I love you,” and then did the deed. Of course the order may have changed once college and the real world arrived, but high school sex is supposed to be a little more innocent. Maybe wearing Chanel and being driven around in a Town Car really do make you grow up faster. [The CW]