There are so many options for Halloween costumes and so many of them seem to be awful. This year, we’ll be giving awards out to the best of the worst the holiday has to offer.
I can understand wanting to be something scary for Halloween, but the Stalker Man costume and with the exceptionally, long, snakey arms reads creepy as fuck rather than frightening. I mean, does any man really want to play up his threatening side? Approach a lady while wearing this costume — or anyone for that matter — and they’ll probably call the cops. [$49.99 Spirit Halloween]
I haven’t been religiously watching
HBO’s Showtime’s “Masters Of Sex” — which is about sex researchers Dr. William Masters and Virginia Johnson — but any show that would inspire a Halloween costume that involves carrying around a giant dildo vibrator is fine by me! Get the deets on how to dress up as Lizzy Caplan’s character after the jump! Keep reading »
Some people think a person’s true colors come out when they’re facing extreme hardship, others believe you should judge people by how they behave in prosperous times. We happen to think that the best time to see someone’s true personality is right after they’ve gotten a bunch of free candy from strangers are sitting around with their friends assessing their haul. Yep, there’s no better time to do some sign-spotting than Halloween night, in the crazy, sugar-fueled aftermath of trick-or-treating. Which sign is organizing candy trades to gain power? Which sign is carefully planning their candy-eating strategy? Which sign is bragging incessantly about the king-size Snickers they scored? Read on to find out how to spot each zodiac sign on Halloween, even if they’re wearing a Batman mask… Keep reading »
Caution: Both of these costumes will scar children for life. But which one is more repulsive to you: the bush flasher or the blow up doll? To prepare you for some of the heinous, inappropriate getups you’ll see on Halloween next week, we present to you our WTF?! Halloween Costume Contest. Keep reading »
Both equally repulsive and offensive Halloween costumes, my initial knee-jerk reaction to both the human ring toss costume and sex costume would be to crotch-kick the person wearing them. Unfortunately, doing so would likely land me behind bars— an ironic twist to my “Orange Is The New Black” costume.
Instead, let’s just vote on which Halloween costume is more WTF?! Keep reading »
When Halloween costume purveyor Yandy.com — best known for their incredible array of hilariously absurd “sexy” costumes — reached out to us and offered to send us any costumes we wanted, we wasted on time saying yes. As much as we’ve poked fun at Yandy’s costumes over the years, we happen to seriously appreciate the site’s ridiculous sense of humor. And we were more than happy to pick a costume and model it for your entertainment.
What would Halloween be without scary campfire stories? It’s the best time of year to get bundled up, binge on s’mores, and try to scare the shit out of your friends with creepy tales of ghosts, demons, serial killers, monsters, and ax murderers. We thought it was time to give these classic tales a pop culture twist, because really, what’s scarier than Hollywood? Here’s how it works: use whatever standard scary story intro you want (dark and stormy night, friends doing a séance, creepy cabin sleepover, haunted bathroom mirror, etc), and then sub in one of these celebrity-inspired punchlines for the big, gasp-worthy finish: Keep reading »
Because most states don’t have any laws about disclosing a death occurrence on a property — whether it was a murder, suicide, accident, illness or natural death — there’s nowhere for buyers or renters to go to ensure that their dream apartment doesn’t sit on top of a cemetery or something nice like that. Thanks to a new website, DiedInHouse.com, which gives a full report of all the deceased spirits who may be lurking on your property, never again will a person unknowingly move into a haunted house I mean, if you’re into living in the house where John Wayne Gacy, Jr. hid bodies in a crawl space…enjoy! The rest of us would rather not.
All you have to do is enter your address and for a small fee ($11.99 to be exact), the website will inform of all the people who died on your property and how it happened. Considering how difficult it is to find an apartment in NYC, I am going to abide by the ignorance is bliss policy. I’m too scared to know what entities may be hanging out in my living room. [Gothamist]
[Photo from Shutterstock]
Ohmygodhelpme. I have fallen into a kids’ costume k-hole and I can’t get out. Warning to any man who sleeps with me in the next, oh, 30 days: don’t trust me when I say I’m on the Pill. I’m not. If I say that I am, it’s just because I’m desperate to have a baby of my own to dress up for Halloween next year. So, you know, if you aren’t down for that — but I won’t make you pay child support or even go halfsies on a Dobby costume, I swear — wear a rubber. Anyway, click onward for a whole mess of ridiculously cute kids’ costumes…
Something happens to Halloween when you become an adult.
The holiday is no longer a night known for trick-or-treating, sugar highs and precious children dressed up as fairy tale characters. Instead, doom and dread take over as you retire your “skanky” [insert noun here] costume, and in turn, prepare yourself to be offended by the costumes you’ll encounter outside of the safe bubble you call home.
I won’t lie. Some of the costumes you’ll witness next week, worn by actual adult humans, will be offensive— some even repulsive. To prevent you from instinctually punching/cursing/upchucking when you come in contact with one of them, we’re kicking off the festivities with a WTF?! Costume Battle. Keep reading »