In a tear-filled, two-part interview airing on “The Insider” tonight and tomorrow night, Jon Gosselin‘s girlfriend, 22-year-old Hailey Glassman, breaks down while talking about how her life has changed since she began seeing Jon. The above clip aired on “Good Morning America” earlier, with Hailey crying that Jon is abusing her by taking out his frustrations on her:

“He’ll call me and take his anger out on me. He has ‘mantrums.’ I shouldn’t have to put up with being emotionally abused. I cry and say, ‘Why are you so mean to me?’ He takes it out on me.”

Jon Gosselin‘s girlfriend (for now), Hailey Glassman, has supposedly enlisted a crew of friends to call companies and ask for free clothes, jewelry, and even a pricey detox diet. The 23-year-old is using her “role” on “Jon & Kate Plus 8” to get freebies, an insider claims. Unfortunately for Hailey, most companies aren’t biting. One went as far to say, “We don’t want to be a part of the drama and most companies have no desire to align themselves with Jon and Hailey. Companies that give gifts to celebrities want positive people attached to their products.” But hey, a girl’s gotta try. [Fox News]

The whole concept of swag is pretty infuriating. Why give free stuff to the people who can totally afford it? But I don’t begrudge famous folks for working the system. After the jump, the most notorious swag hoarders!

Since taking yourself too seriously should be a crime, I truly appreciate it when people of note take to Funny or Die to completely decimate themselves in mock online dating profiles. This Hailey Glassman Match.com vid seems particularly brave. “I’m looking for someone who’s half Asian, kind of chubs, with hair plugs. Someone who likes Ed Hardy thongs and white chicks who wear their trucker hats to the side,” she says. “About me—I like to party. Get wasted, take cute photos with guns. I can burp the alphabet. I dunno, people say I’d be a great stepmother to eight kids.” But is it just me, or did those burps totally turn your stomach?

It’s the moment you’ve been waiting for. Or not? Tonight, an interview with Jon‘s first post-split piece of arm candy, Hailey Glassman, will air on E! News. She’s come out of hiding to claim she isn’t a fame whore, and insists that she’s totally in love with the daddy of eight. Oh yeah, and she admits the two were dating a month before Jon and Kate announced their split. Oops.

After the jump, more news about this dysfunctional fam.

Tabloids are kind of like elaborate ventures into fan-fiction. Basically, they watch celebrities and then pick and choose where the stories would go if they had their way. Hey, wouldn’t it be cool if these characters fell in love and had to fight for each other? Oh, this celeb is sick—let’s make it heroin! This week, Mischa Barton‘s on drugs, Kate Gosselin and Jon’s new chickadee are clawing each other’s eyes out, Patrick Swayze had a heart attack (that one might be true), and Kristen Stewart is gonna sex it up to win back Robert Pattinson.