I didn’t think it was possible, but I believe my love affair with full, lush, bushy beards may be over. Only one thing could com between me and my lifelong attraction to Paul Bunyon and his scruffy ilk: POOP. An Albuquerque, New Mexico, affiliate of ABC News conducted a study in which men’s beards were… READ MORE »
The subreddit Today I Fucked Up is a source of endless amusement, full of truly facepalm-worthy tales of shame and embarrassment, but I think maybe it has finally reached its pinnacle with this particular tale of woe. While I’m not naive enough to think this fantastically foul story is absolutely 100 percent true, nor do… READ MORE »
Do you know how many times I’ve heard the phrase “dick cheese“? So many times. Countless times. “Period goobers”? Not so much. It’s time to change this, y’all.
Dudes get to talk about their balls and penises in public all the friggin’ time. They’re so used to being able to talk openly about their… READ MORE »
Life is an adventure, or that’s what I told myself yesterday, as a small tube was inserted into my butthole. Hold on, let me backtrack. A few weeks ago, a friend in PR asked if I wanted to write about something called the Optimum Detox Treatment offered at Manhattan’s Paul Labrecque Salon and Spa. Naturally, I… READ MORE »
Thanks to recent research in the Netherlands, we now have confirmation that when we’re in prime mode to get it on, what may normally gross us out no longer does.
The subjects in what I will refer to as the “gross sex study” were given a cup with an insect in it to drink, and were made… READ MORE »
So, a zoo keeper in China took on the incredibly gross but selfless task of licking a monkey’s butt to save its life. A leaf monkey at the Wuhan Zoo became dangerously constipated after it ingested a peanut that had been thrown in its enclosure. Zhang Bangsheng determined that the peanut was too large to pass through… READ MORE »
My fairly new boyfriend Todd was a nice-enough looking guy with some questionable grooming habits. I tried to tell myself that these minor, easily fixable flaws shouldn’t influence how I felt about him.
But instead of gazing into Todd’s eyes, I found myself staring at his nose hair, fixated. Brownish-grey tufts looking like… READ MORE »
Usually I find The New York Times Style section to be embarrassingly behind the times. Recent articles include trend pieces on people playing Big Buck Hunter at bars and the popularity of Twitter hashtags. “What’s next? An article about this new TV show called ‘Jersey Shore’?” I am prone to joking.
However, for the… READ MORE »
Last night, I was reclined on my bed, reading my Twitter feed on my iPad — I am such a modern gal! — when I felt a weird pricking in my abdomen. My belly button, to be more specific. I lifted my shirt to get a better look, my index finger doing the bulk of… READ MORE »
I consider myself lucky because for the better part of 31+ years, I have lived a relatively allergy-free life. But that good fortune also means that when I suddenly found myself responding badly to the uptick of pollen in the spring air I could not shut the f**k up about suddenly having allergies. Seriously, I… READ MORE »
I recently spent the weekend in bed with a terrible stomach bug. At the stroke of midnight on Friday, I began puking my brains out, and what didn’t come up as vomit came out the other end. The next day, I thought the worst of it — the diarrhea — was over, but I was… READ MORE »
Yesterday morning, I woke up with a rather painful sore throat. I headed straight for the mirror and open my mouth as wide as I could, peering down my throat in search of swollen glands or major redness. Instead, I saw white bumps on what I assumed to be my tonsils. I headed straight for… READ MORE »