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“Green Porno 3″ Launches Today!


Today is my first day back at work after enjoying a wonderful two-week honeymoon in Portugal and Spain. So, naturally, I expected to experience a bit of past-vacation blues throughout the day, but, oh, how quickly things turn around! Today, it turns out, is the launch of season three of the Sundance Channel’s critically acclaimed series, “Green Porno,” featuring the beautiful and delightfully quirky Isabella Rossellini. “Green Porno,” if you don’t already know, is a fantastic series of very short films about animals’ sexual behaviors. It’s “scientifically accurate yet extremely entertaining” mostly due to Rossellini, the creator, director, writer and star of the series, who dresses in cardboard and rubber foam cutouts and enacts the mating rituals of the series’ subjects. In past episodes she’s been a dragonfly, spider, bee, praying mantis, worm, snail and housefly, but in the third season she transforms into five different marine animals — a calamari, squid, anchovy, shrimp, and an elephant seal. The new series has the addition of Marine Biologist Claudio Campagna, who serves as a consultant for each episode. Alas, he does not wear cardboard cutouts. He does, however, have a nice accent though. You can see the entire series of “Green Porno” at the Sundance Channel website. Keep reading »

Learn About Animal Sex From Isabella Rossellini

The second round of Isabella Rossellini’s Sundance Channel series “Green Porno” is now online, and we recommend that you watch all six short episodes. Not only will you learn all about how anglerfish reproduce, but Rossellini is hysterical, and you get to see her dressed up as a barnacle, starfish, and a whale. Plus, hearing her say “penis” in her gorgeous accent is amusing.

  • Why Vagina
  • Whale
  • Starfish
  • Limpet
  • Anglerfish
  • Barnacle
  • Keep reading »

    Isabella Rossellini Has A Six-Foot-Long Penis

    In our science classes growing up, we learned about cell reproduction, animal reproduction and, of course, human reproduction. We wish Isabella Rossellini’s “Green Porno” had been around back when we were in seventh grade so we could have learned the birds and the bees while having a laugh, rather than squirming in our seat every time our teacher said the word “sperm.”

    “Green Porno” is a series of short films, all two minutes or shorter in length, that show Rossellini dressed up as various creatures (including a whale with a six-foot dick) and explaining in her beautiful Italian accent the various details about how they procreate.

    Rossellini has always been interested in animal behavior, ever since she was a little girl, and she decided to focus on the sex lives of animals in her short film series because, well, sex sells. “Not many people are interested in animal behavior, but everyone is interested in sex,” she tells us. So, she decided to make the series about how animals have sex, because it would be “varied, and scandalous, and different.” The short films aren’t meant to illuminate us on our own sex lives — after all, a barnacle probably doesn’t share the same sexual problems as you — but Rossellini does want you to learn something. “It’s supposed to be funny,” she says. “I would like the first reaction to be a laugh, and the second reaction to be, ‘Oh, I didn’t know that about animals!’”

    The second season of “Green Porno” starts April 1, but if you haven’t seen the first season, catch up on it now at SundanceChannel.com/GreenPorno. Seriously, you should watch it. Sex hasn’t been this comical since your first time. Keep reading »

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