Now that your undergraduate days are over, it’s time to step out into the big, bad world of adulthood. Jobs! Money! Real Men Who Don’t Smell Like Stale Beer and Frat Houses! But before you slip on your grown up panties and make them dollars, there are some things you should probably know about navigating the rough waters of the real world. After all, every situation is less scary when you’re prepared, so consider these 10 tidbits of wisdom our graduation gift to you (because we can’t afford to get you anything else). Keep reading »
The other day I saw clickbait on the Internet called something like “10 Things You Find In Every Graduation Speech.” I didn’t click, but the headline stuck in my mind. Graduation is supposed to be a celebration of your hard work, a launch into the adult working world. A graduation speaker is someone chosen to offer wisdom and insight into this momentous rite of passage. Have graduation speeches really gotten so formulaic that they can slapped together with GIFs on BuzzFeed? (I guess they must? I only graduated nine years ago and I don’t even remember who my speaker was or what she said.)
I’ve been thinking about this lately because today, our editorial assistant Claire is graduating from college. Yesterday afternoon, we broke out the pink booze and mini eclairs to toast to no more finals and 10-page papers. As The Frisky staff sat around — all of us between five to 15 years out of college — we all had advice for Claire about being launched into the grownup world. Some of it was practical. Some of it was financial. All of it was honest and most assuredly more useful than whatever’s being said about “character” and “grit” and “passion” at graduations across the land this week. Those things are important, too, but they’re so vague you can make a GIFicle about them.
It made me wish I was the sort of “important person” who could be asked to give a commencement address. Seeing as I’m not an famous actor or a famous editor or really anyone important in particular, I don’t really see that happening. So for Claire, and for everyone else who may or may not have deeper thoughts on life than Charlie Day from “It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia,” here’s what I would say if someone asked me to give a commencement speech. Keep reading »
“It meant more to our father to deal with a setback and try to bounce back than to watch how we handled our successes. Show what you are made of, he would say. Graduating from Wake Forest means all of you have experienced success already. And some of you — and now I’m talking to anyone who’s been dumped, not gotten the job you really wanted, or received those horrible rejection letters from grad school — you know the sting of losing. Or not getting something you badly want. When that happens, show what you are made of.”
Not many could have their firing on the front page of newspapers and still show their face the next week to deliver a commencement address. So for that reason alone, I admire Jill Abramson, the former executive editor of The New York Times, who was canned last week and spoke this morning at Wake Forest’s graduation. Regardless of what you think about Abramson’s firing and whose “side” you believe — Abramson was reportedly considered “pushy,” including about her pay and pension; the Times brass emailed staff saying she was was laid off because she wasn’t a good manager — the woman’s thoughts on resilience are worth listening to. [YouTube via Mashable]
Graduation is a big deal. Plenty of people like to see it as the total culmination of a young person’s character and dedication. As the greeting cards say, “You Earned It Champ!” Earning a degree isn’t easy and deserves celebration.
The catch, though, is that celebratory public events like commencement are a prime breeding ground for Special Snowflakes and that makes life a whole lot harder for those who are unlucky enough to trespass into the glow of their imaginary limelight. Keep reading »
By now you’ve heard about the 63 students who were arrested at Teaneck High School in New Jersey for a senior prank that veered off-course into straight-up vandalism. Nearly one-fifth of the senior class broke into the school overnight on Wednesday to pee on the floors, smear petroleum jelly on doorknobs, overturn chairs and desks, and leave raw eggs and hot dogs scattered about. These geniuses set off an alarm at 2 a.m. and got busted by police. Now the
parents pranksters are facing criminal mischief and burglary charges, which could possibly effect potential scholarships. This reminded me of an aborted senior prank some girl in my class tried. She got caught stealing the janitor’s keys (what she intended to do with them, I don’t know) and got suspended. She had been accepted into Columbia University and when they heard about her prank, they rescinded her offer. No one really felt bad for her because it was hella dumb.
Did any Frisky readers have a senior prank? How did it go? Did you get caught? What happened? [NorthJersey.com] [Image of a dunce via Shutterstock]
I have to give some props to recent graduate Robert Jeffrey Blank. Who else is brave enough to attempt a backflip in front of thousands of your peers and closest family members, all in the name of some extra attention? But the ex-Davenport University student didn’t exactly stick his landing — in fact, he fell flat on his face, but who even cares? Something tells me his epic attempt still made everyone in that auditorium pay attention. [KDVR Denver]
Erin Faith Page was chosen to represent students at New England College’s commencement this year. The school also chose Senator Kelly Ayotte as a keynote speaker at the event, offering her an honorary degree. The problem? Erin is an out lesbian who believes that Ayotte’s conservative politics make her a terrible choice for the honor.
But New England College, a small, private liberal arts college with around 1,800 students is sticking by its choice. ”The College is pleased to have Senator Ayotte speak at our Commencement Ceremony as we have a rich tradition of welcoming differing viewpoints and celebrating freedom of speech,” NEC’s Vice President for Academic Affairs Mark Watman told The Frisky. In case you’re not familiar with Ayotte, she is staunchly anti-gay marriage, supports the Defense of Marriage Act, and most recently voted against the gun control bill. In a petition created by Page, she writes that Ayotte: Keep reading »
Reddit user alyak72 decided to forgo the traditional celebratory tone of most college graduation announcements and take the brutally honest route instead. I’m sure many of today’s college graduates feel the same way, but damn, those tears and the pleading for cash are a little intense. What would you do if you got this card in the mail? [Neatorama]
Kara Koskowich really wanted to make a statement when she graduated from high school, so rather than donning the traditional white graduation dress, Kara made her own — out of old math homework. [CNN]