I am writing to express my condolences about your recent media onslaught. I know the world went apes**t when they discovered your dirty little secret…your toe thumbs. It must be disconcerting having your weirdo thumbs be the number one highest-ranking item on Google Trends over the weekend. Geez, peeps must have been really bored. If pictures of my alien fingers were all over the internet (my hands are really weird, too, but I digress), I might feel ashamed. Perhaps your plush lifestyle makes up for it? I still have a roommate and no cable. So thank you for reminding me that no one is perfect.
P.S. Is there such a thing as thumb surgery? You could probably afford it. Just a thought…it would give a whole new meaning to the term “hand job.” HA! Keep reading »
Contrary to what we’ve heard from the guys on our IM, Google searches seem to indicate that men prefer women to have a wild, out of control bush over waxed or shaved pubic styles. According to YesButNoButYes, a bikini shop owner did some investigating of Google search trends and discovered that more people search the term “hairy p*ssy” than they do “bald p*ssy,” “shaved p*ssy,” “brazilian wax,” or “bikini wax.” These are hardly scientific results; after all, who knows if these Googlers were searching for these terms based on pubic hair preference. And besides that, the other results added up about equal the total for “hairy p*ssy” searches. Also, don’t people search for things they’re generally really, like, interested in? Maybe those who really, really like untamed pubes are more devoted to their fetish than the majority who prefer but don’t obsess about a little below-the-belt grooming. Keep reading »