I had to say goodbye to one of the most intrinsic parts of my life this last year. It was something that was there on my darkest days, my most celebrated moments and during nearly every major life event. It was there when I took repeated shots of courage and came out to my dad, the first, second and 10th time I got my heart broken, and when I met what’s-her-name, my first one-night stand. When all else felt bleak, and I wanted to feel surrounded by friends, I would head to my local lesbian bar, T’s in Chicago’s Andersonville neighborhood, and patronize a place that had become like my second home.
Most recently it served as the place where I held my 30th birthday party, where we closed it down only to discover that it would not be reopening again the next day. Imagine it as Cheers: less a few gentlemen with more armband tattoos and a constant loop of “The Real L Word” reruns playing on huge flat screens and there you have it, the local lesbian bar that can be found in cities across the country. Now, still thinking of a place where everybody knows your name, take away the physical bar and there goes the sense of community, the place to socialize, the place to make mistakes, the place you felt most comfortable being yourself. Keep reading »
When you’re in a committed relationship, it’s inevitable you will be asked by friends, among other people, if you plan on having children. When you’re in a committed lesbian relationship, it’s inevitable you’ll be offered your friends’ sperm.
My wife and I have been married six months and I’m not sure if it’s that fact alone or the rise in popularity of lesbian pregnancies in pop culture that has given the males in our lives the idea that we will be needing a donor very, very soon. Keep reading »
It makes me really happy that people are speculating about Rosie O’Donnell’s love life, that she’s in People magazine talking about how she met her girlfriend at a Starbucks. And The National Enquirer, that trashy rag, wrote an entire story recently about how Portia and Ellen don’t want kids. They literally took one idea from Ellen’s new book where she said they won’t have kids and made it into a news item. That, too, makes me a little giddy.
Lesbians are finally getting tabloid equality. Keep reading »
I feel so bad for “Entourage” star Kevin Dillon right now. He’s hurt because of a joke Jane Lynch made while hosting the Emmy Awards last weekend. He said what Jane did was “unfair,” because it is just not true!
What Jane said: “A lot people are very curious as to why I’m a lesbian — ladies and gentleman, the cast of ‘Entourage.’”
Keep reading »
I feel like I’ve been writing about weddings a lot, but I guess it’s just that time of year. I had my first experience buying bachelorette accessories for a lesbian wedding this month, as the first one I attended was my own, so I didn’t buy anything for myself. But for my best friend, I had to find the funniest stuff I could. This would have been easy if she were into penises, as they are all over the bachelorette schwag that sex stores sell. Keep reading »
This week I’ve had a few reminders of the rules that exist for gay girls like me in American society. But because I’m an optimist, I’d like to look the bright side of things I can’t do in public. Keep reading »
Congratulations New York! You’re now the newest state to celebrate marriage equality. And since studies show lesbians are the bulk of the married gay population, there’s a lot of things you’ll want to know before your big day. I got married in May, so I’m going to share a few of my own personal stories. Keep reading »
I know I’m lucky to have it as easy as I do. I’m a lesbian, which means I don’t have to put up with any crap from men. In fact, I’m exempt from patriarchy, and women are just so easy! I don’t have a care in the world, being gay. I don’t have to worry about getting married or having children – I can just share my closet and my hair products with my girlfriend and live in a state of bliss while vacationing on Olivia Cruise ships.
If only any of it were true. Keep reading »
Reality TV is a tricky medium. It claims to be a realistic portrayal of the people (“characters”) and themes (“storylines”) it pieces together in each episode, but viewers are often left wondering how much of it was all for the cameras. So when a show is supposed to be a “real” portrait of a subset of under-represented people, it can be a little dangerous. And I’m not talking about any Housewives, Kardashians or aspiring pop stars.
Last summer, Showtime premiered the first season of “The Real L Word.” Reviews and ratings were poor, but the president of the network and producers of the show believed they identified a diamond in the rough in one of its “real” lesbians named Whitney. The second season, which premiered last Sunday night, is a radically different show in that Whitney is the only returning cast member, and the rest of the new ones all appear to be just as willing as she is to get naked and intimate on screen. Keep reading »
I don’t hide the fact that the holidays are not my favorite time of year. Christmas does not make me think of tinsel-covered trees and red and green wrapping paper. It makes me think of crowded stores, overpriced gifts and too much family time. Plus, it falls right around the coldest and darkest days of the year. If Jesus was so special, why didn’t he pick a better month for his birthday?
New Year’s is slightly better because it involves lots of alcohol and, the next day, you get to start afresh. Keep reading »