Tag Archives: gender roles

Women In The Workplace Is “A Problem,” Says Morocco’s Prime Minister

todays lady news
  • The Prime Minister of Morocco recently spoke out against advancements for women, bemoaning how us ladies aren’t embracing the “sacred status that God gave to women” by finding “time to get married, to be mothers, or to educate their children.” Society, it is crumbling. [New York Times]
  • NBC allegedly refused to air ads for the film “Obvious Child” that contained the word ‘abortion.’ [Page Six]
  • The Presbyterian Church has voted to change the definition of marriage to mean between “two people” and to allow ministers to perform same-sex marriages where it is legal. [New York Times]
  • Here’s Hillary Clinton’s conversation with NPR’s show “Fresh Air.” [NPR] Keep reading »

Frisky Rant: Want To “Save Marriage”? Stop Telling Women What To Do

marriage-conservative

Conservatives’ stance on marriage hasn’t ever much suited me. The so-called value they profess the loudest is “Preserving And Protecting Traditional Marriage” — it sat at number one atop the 2012 GOP platform — and is of course coded language for marriage between a man and a woman.

Their PR strategy for pushing traditional marriage is pretty firmly focused on accusing LGBTQ couples of not being “natural.” Obviously this boner for “saving marriage” is just a cover for bigotry towards LGTBQ folks. But having recently gotten married — to a man — I’m noticing more and more how conservatives meddle in heterosexual marriage, too.

Ladies, you haven’t won the game just because you have a ring on your finger!  You are also probably doing something wrong right this minute!

Keep reading »

Photo Series Tackles Dating While Feminist

We’re pretty intrigued by this photo series project called “Feminism is not a means to just justify self entitlement,” in which signs held by a man and a woman clarify what it can mean to be in a relationship while being a feminist. I know I’ve definitely had moments where I’ve gotten caught up in where feminism fit within traditional dating rituals; this series explains some points of confusion about gender roles and simply being a loving partner.

Do these pictures resonate with you or do you feel like they already go without saying? I find myself leaning in both ways — these are important points that some people don’t understand, but I would hope a reasonably thoughtful person doesn’t need the difference between chivalry and oppression to be spelled out.  I’d love your thoughts. [Jezebel, Imgur]

Christian School Pressures 8-Year-Old Sunnie Kahle To Leave Because She Looks Too Much Like A Boy

We <3 Sunnie Just The Way She Is
sunnie kahle
Sunnie Is A Tomboy

It is with a heavy heart that I inform you that some people who run “Christian” schools are actually enormous dicks.

Eight-year-old Sunnie Kahle is no longer a student at Timberlake Christian School in Lynchburg, Virginia, after administrators sent a letter home to her guardians complaining she doesn’t dress or behave “feminine” enough, like wearing pants with her school uniform. Her grandparents, who are her guardians, pulled Sunnie out of Timberlake and enrolled her in public school instead of forcing her to be someone she is not.

Sunnie is a tomboy with a big, infectious smile who wears short hair (she donated her longer hair to kids with cancer!) and comfy clothes like jeans and T-shirts to run around outside. But elementary principal Becky Bowman from Timberlake Christian School wrote in a letter to Sunnie’s grandparents that perhaps it’s “not the best place for her future education” if Sunnie can’t conform to the Biblically-based gender identity they dictate:

“You’re probably aware that Timberlake Christian School is a religious, Bible believing institution providing education in a distinctly Christian environment … We believe that unless Sunnie as well as her family clearly understand that God has made her female and her dress and behavior need to follow suit with her God-ordained identity, that TCS is not the best place for her future education.” Keep reading »

5 Shocking Realities Of Being Transgender The Media Ignores

I bet that, for most of you, nothing would feel weirder than having your dad or brother tell you he’s now a woman. And for a certain percentage of people, the reaction to that news would be violent. The reality is that the entire concept of transgender people makes folks very uncomfortable, which means we’re simply not talking about it enough.

I’m Amy, a 20-something trans woman living in California. Read more on Cracked…

The Soapbox: On Lori Gottlieb, “Egalitarian” Relationships And Sexual Passion

The author Lori Gottlieb markets herself as a teller of harsh relationship truths for women. As a contributor to The Atlantic, she saw her 2008 piece “Marry Him!” turned into a full-fledged book in which she advocates that women abandon long lists of qualities marriageable men need to have and marry Mr. Good Enough before their biological clock ticks its last tock. (I interviewed Gottlieb about Marry Him: The Case For Settling For Mr. Good Enough back in 2011.)

Gottlieb, who is also a psychotherapist, is back with a new controversial subject in The New York Times Magazine: how trying to be completely egalitarian in our relationships may be taking the passion out of our sex lives. Keep reading »

Frisky Q&A: Emily Matchar, Author of Homeward Bound: Why Women Are Embracing The New Domesticity

Home Decor On A Budget
home decorating photo
Decorate a cute place even if you're a broke-ass mofo. Read More »
Thanks, I Made It Myself
DIY Hair Accessories
All of The Frisky's very own DIY projects in one place! Read More »
QA Emily Matchar Homeward Bound

One upon a time, the phrase “domestic diva” referred to Martha Stewart and stereotypes of 1950′s housewives. But you may have noticed recently that all your friends are knitting and growing their own kale. Your cousin is raising chickens in her backyard. Your mom is making her own pickles and selling them on Etsy. And everyone is wondering why you aren’t baking your own bread yet.  (“It’s so easy!”)  Congratulations, you have been hit by New Domesticity, an aughties phenomenon in which traditional homemaking tasks experience a revival in the hopes of saving money, eating fresher, improving health, and cutting the government out of your personal life.

Journalist Emily Matchar always loved reading blogs, especially the do-it-yourself (DIY) and homesteading genres. She was surprised to see a lot of middle-class professionals, including Third and Forth Wave feminists (not the likeliest group to embrace washing their laundry by hand), taking on pioneer woman-style chores and calling it a feminist choice. Matchar got curious what was going on. Why would people milk their own cows if they could just buy milk at the store?  Why would parents refuse to vaccinate their children? Were women who quit their jobs to devote themselves full-time to growing nearly all their family’s food could really be serious? Quickly Matchar fell down a rabbit hole where answers only lead to more questions.  There are liberal Earth mamas, conservative Mormon housewives and even some pioneering dudes who read the same blogs about DIY homemaking tips — and they are everywhere. In her new book, Homeward Bound: Why Women Are Embracing The New Domesticity speaks to a bunch of these folks and paints a fascinating portrait of this new twisty-turn in feminism.

I spoke with Matchar over the phone in Hong Kong, where she is currently living about New Domesticity, traditional gender roles, and the pleasures of breaking your bed. (Apparently, it really is so easy.)  Our conversation, after the jump:

Keep reading »

Mommie Dearest: Going To Hell In A Handbag

Disrupting The Pink Aisle
Little Girls Sing About "Disrupting The Pink Aisle" In Toy Stores To The Tune Of "We Are The Champions"
Little girls sing about disrupting the pink aisle in toy stores! Read More »
Little Girls & LEGOs
LEGOs are the perfect gender neutral toy. Why make them "girly"? Read More »
Easy Bake Oven For Boys
Teen activist asks Hasbro to market oven to both genders. Read More »
On Sex And Gender
difference between sex and gender
Let's talk about the difference between sex and gender. Read More »
Skylar Davis vera bradley purse

There are a lot of worries parents might have as their child heads off to school: academic struggles, not getting along with teachers or classmates, bad behavior. The potential consequences for these concerns are worrisome as well. As a mother (and one who used to teach high school social studies), I don’t think it’s all that unusual to fret over things like these.

But one thing I didn’t think I’d have to be worried about is the possibility of my son being suspended for his sense of style. A 13-year-old 8th grader from Kansas was recently suspended for wearing a Vera Bradley handbag while attending school.

Suspended. For having a quilted bag. Seriously. Keep reading »

It’s OK, The Word “Wife” Isn’t Going To Bite

What "Wife" Means
The connotations of the word "wife" worry bride-to-be Andrea Grimes. Read More »
What Does A "Real Wife" Do?
This hashtag from Twitter makes us despair for humanity. Read More »
Beyonce & Mrs. Carter
On Beyonce and the luxury of playing "Mrs. Carter." Read More »
wife husband

A woman goes through life with a number of labels that she doesn’t have any control over, either by birth or by society’s imposition. But one label she should get to choose is whether she wants to be someone’s “wife” or not.  This should be a right for all of us.

A recent piece on Salon.com by soon-to-be-married author Tracy Clark-Flory about the word “wife” really pissed me off.  Clark-Flory wrote about going over the language of her wedding ceremony script with her fiancé and getting to the part that says “I now pronounce you husband and wife.”

Husband? Wife? I could barely conceal my gagging sounds. He said something to the effect of, “Ew, gross.”

She continues:

It makes me feel like Betty Draper, like I should be fetching his slippers and a scotch on the rocks — and remembering to get the roast bird out of the oven. (In reality, I’ve only just recently expanded my cooking repertoire beyond Kraft mac ‘n’ cheese and things you put in the microwave. He, however, will roast a chicken and make a rustic tart from scratch — all in one night.) I am a daughter, partner and friend — but a wife? I can’t help but imagine saying “I’m his wife” with heavy air quotes, a roll of the eyes or exaggerated feminine cheer.

Clark-Flory then expresses concern that the Middle English/Old English terms for “wife” and “husband” translate, roughly, to “vagina” and “householder.” It’s not that I don’t understand Clark-Flory’s discomfort with both words or their histories (although dredging up the Old English definition? really?). But I’m uneasy with how glib she was about that choice when so many people are scrambling to have the same one. Keep reading »

Mommie Dearest: Breastfeeding Shouldn’t Make Men And Women Unequal As Parents

Yoga Mom Breastfeeds
Yoga Mom Takes Breastfeeding To A Whole New Level
Yoga mom takes breastfeeding to a whole new level. Read More »
Nursing On Facebook
Why is Facebook so against photos of mothers breastfeeding? Read More »
Breastfeeding on Time
TIME magazine breastfeeding cover photo
Time magazine's breastfeeding cover is just a tad provocative. Read More »
reaction to Erickson breastfeeding article

When it comes to mothering and the so-called “Mommy Wars,” the one debate that will seemingly never die is the one centered around breastfeeding. I’ve written extensively about breastfeeding in the past, and in my day job I work on finding accessible ways to educate pregnant women about breastfeeding, in the hopes that they’ll at least be open to trying it out once their baby is born. I’m of the mind that “breast is best,” but I’m also painfully aware that we  as a country and society  do not make it easy in the slightest for women  —particularly working women or those from lower socio-economic backgrounds— to breastfeed. I was a big fan of this year’s World Breastfeeding Week and I try and support women who want to breastfeeding but lack resources/information/help. I also try to support and provide information for pregnant women who aren’t sure about whether they will nurse or not. And, when possible, I help connect parents who want their babies to have breast milk with mothers who have an excess supply. I also will not shame, harass, or harangue a woman who chooses to or needs to formula feed their baby for whatever reason.

I will, however, call out someone who uses faulty logic as reasoning for not nursing her hypothetical future child. Karla A. Erickson’s “Explaining Why, Next Time, I Won’t Breastfeed” was a recent op/ed in the Iowa Press-Citizen that purports to use breastfeeding as the cause of uneven and unequal division of labor when it comes to parenting. Keep reading »

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