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FriskyScopes With Kiki T

For the week of April 7-13, 2008

Aries (March 21-April 19)
Hot, horny and insatiable is you on the 6th, when the new moon in Aries revs you up. However, the next day, when Venus, the sensuality planet, enters Aries, you’ll be officially out of control. Expect lewd thoughts to fill your brain and your body to go into automatic, rubbing against any hot thing with a pulse. As for personality, that’ll be the least of your cares.
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For The Week Of April 7-13, 2008

Virgo (August 23 – September 22)

Secret sex will stir up your life. Love being the girl with the mysterious glow that has everyone whispering. Not to say you can’t spill your skeletons, but why bother? The privacy you’ll have to let whatever happen, without nosy friends prying will be the best gift you can give your bourgeoning relationship. Besides, let’s see if he’s even worth talking about first.

Libra (September 23 – October 22)

Decisions come out this week. Expect to finally seal the deal with that special someone or have had it with a relationship all together and decide to go solo. Either or, finding your balance is going to be your new mission and come hell or high water you’re going to find it. The good news is that no matter what you choose, empowerment will follow.

Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)

By the way people scowl at you when you tell them your sign, you should know you have nothing to lose when it comes saying how you really feel. Face it, most people aren’t going to get you anyway and that’s okay. Realize that’s the best defense you can ask for and keep on intimidating. After all, do you really want to be dating spineless morons?

Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)

The level of selfishness you hit now will say all you need to know about how much you care about your latest plaything. Committed or not, this week will lead you down the road to many tempting offers and some may be too hot to refuse. How you play your cards can give you the winning pot or make you bottom out. Choose wisely.

Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)

If you’re already living with someone, expect a lovey dovey time of domestic bliss. If you’ve been seeing some, step it up and play house. Even if you don’t think you’re there yet, jump in and try it out — even if it’s for a week. Learning those odd habits now will be what endears you the most to one another and get your oxytocin levels soaring to new heights.

Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)

Hot hook-ups will be close to home. If you have had the hots for your neighbor or someone that works close by, this is the time to put on the F-me pumps, walk on over and introduce yourself. If there’s no one close by, then hit up siblings for introductions. If you’re an only child that lives and works alone, then this is a great time to buy your perfect vibrator.

Pisces (February 19 – March 20)

Let your superficiality rage. As the sign of compassion, you have a tendency to hook-up with one too many charity cases and this week, time to turn the tide. Be good to yourself; indulge in lust for just pure lust. Not to say you can’t want someone for his inner beauty, but who has time for anything other than instant gratification? For this week, certainly not you.

Aries (March 21 – April 19)

Hot, horny and insatiable is you on the 6th, when the new moon in Aries revs you up. However, the next day, when Venus, the sensuality planet, enters Aries, you’ll be officially out of control. Expect lewd thoughts to fill your brain and your body to go into automatic, rubbing against any hot thing with a pulse. As for personality, that’ll be the least of your cares.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20)

Get in a sexier state of mind by hitting the dance floor and shaking it. Positive energy attracts positive energy and unless you get back in touch with your more physical side, it’ll make your outlook rather dull. Jumpstart the caboose. If you have a man, drag him out there too. If unattached, your moves and the pheromones oozing out your pores will draw in the prospects.

Gemini (May 21 – June 20)

Although you’re an air sign, ruled by mercury, and are all about operating on an intellectual plane, time to switch gears. Drop the psychoanalysis routine and let your emotions do your talking. Not that you have to get all sappy and cry, but admitting that you aren’t all logic and fact will soften you up and make you more approachable, not to mention more f’able.

Cancer (June 21 – July 22)

Sure, your mama brought you up to be a nice and respectable lady, presentable for even the most formal occasions. However, you know there’s a freak inside you that can spring out at the most inappropriate times, making you a menace to tradition and a hound for trouble. Don’t fight it. Accept who you are and the right flock will find you.

Leo (July 23 – August 22)

There’s nothing hotter than you at your bossiest, going ego to ego with the one you lust. Expect sparks to fly when you and you honey have it out. No stone will go unturned. Drama will fly from every corner of your life and through it all will be deeper understanding and intense revelations. To say the least, this week, you’ll be cocked and ready for action.

FriskyScopes With Kiki T

For the week of March 31-April 6, 2008

Aries (March 21-April 19)
Your hotness heats up, so aim high. Don’t waste time on charity cases and borderline crushes. You know they only occupy mental space that then makes you waste time analyzing his actions when deep down you could care less. Break free of those habits now. A worthy contender is coming; until then, save the juice for a more savory flavor.
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Down and Dirty Advice Straight From The Stars

Is your love life in a tizzy? Feeling trapped in a scandalous situation that only cosmic forces can pull you out of? Looking for answers that only fate can provide? If so, then you’ve come to the right place — right to the presence of Kiki T., the one and only Astrosexologist Extraordinaire and overall moral authority. Spill your sexy secrets and find out how to satisfy yourself celestially. By learning all the astrological ins and out to love and lust, you can realize that getting some control isn’t necessarily light years away. Sure, Kiki’s FriskyScopes are awesome, but aren’t you hungering for more….specific advice? Head to Kiki’s board on The Frisky Forums and post a question about your own sex/love life — just be sure to include as much astrological info as possible so Kiki knows who she’s workin’ with.
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FriskyScopes With Kiki T

For the week of March 24-30, 2008

Aries (March 21-April 19)
Self-possession is 9/10th the way to turn on any object of desire. Remember you’re the sign of fearlessness and thrive on challenge. You’re a warrior and failure is never an option. Repeat this to yourself often, like putting on armor and then ready yourself for that fated moment this week when you’ll finally be face-to-face with that hot someone you’ve been eyeing.
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FriskyScopes With Kiki T

For the week of March 17-23, 2008
Pisces (February 20-March 20)
Your misunderstood villainness will be in full effect, causing undue mayhem wherever you go and inciting love affairs that you will end cruelly and coldly — but to you, it’ll be all in a day’s work. Yes, there’ll be no accounting for your behavior this week, but what can you do when born with a sex appeal so strong and passion to love so intense?
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FriskyScopes With Kiki T

For the week of March 10-16, 2008

Pisces (February 20-March 20)
The planets are continually moving into positions made to suit you. So, with the world in the palm of your hand, do with it what you will — make everyone lick your boots and believe the sun sets and rises out of your booty. Seriously, it’s aspects like this that’ll make even your most ridiculous dreams come true. Don’t hold back the demands. Keep reading »

FriskyScopes With Kiki T

For the week of March 3-9, 2008

Pisces (February 20-March 20)
A thrilling week is coming by way of a new moon in Pisces and Mars entering into the compatible Cancer sign. What does this all mean? You’ll be hotter than a habanero chile pepper in the middle of hell! Just point and choose, the minions are at your disposal, do with them as you will. Keep reading »

FriskyScopes With Kiki T

For the week of February 25-March 2, 2008

Pisces (February 20-March 20)
The aftershocks from a recent change in your relationship are still reverberating in your mind and it’ll affect your body for a while too. Although you might feel shaken and stirred on many different levels, know that you are on the right path and whatever dismal drama you are facing now in the end will make you a hotter commodity. Trust.
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FriskyScopes With Kiki T

For the week of February 18-24, 2008

Pisces (February 20-March 20)
You may have bitten off more than you can chew in your latest escapades, but remember, you’re a lady that likes to swallow the drama down in big gulps. So, despite the fact that you have wound up on Psycho Lane in matters of the heart, turn this disaster into your ultimate swan song — at the least, gain as much sympathy from your friends as you can. Keep reading »

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