Tag Archives: frisky rant

Frisky Rant: On The Great Robin Thicke Feminist Knee-Jerk Fiasco Of 2013

Frisky Rant: On The Great Robin Thicke Feminist Knee-Jerk Fiasco Of 2013
Rejected Robin Thicke Songs
Robin Thicke & Paula Patton Announce That They’re Separating
Songs about Paula Patton that did not make the cut, unforch. Read More »

The first time I really listened to the lyrics of “Blurred Lines,” I was like, “This is my JAM!” It only took a few minutes of Googling and reading my favorite feminist blogs, though, before I started becoming horrified and dismayed at the feminist community’s reaction to the song. The Daily Beast kicked off a knee-jerk party by calling it a “rape song,” and from there it was over. Feminist blog after feminist blog started jumping on the bandwagon, then the fervor spread to major news outlets, and all summer I was mired in language that made me feel excluded from a community into which I’ve invested not only my time and energy, but also my identity.

Let me be clear, Robin Thicke as a person seems like a giant douchenozzle and his latest album is pathetic. But I looooove “Blurred Lines.” The accusation that it’s “rapey” is unfounded if you look at the entire song in context: It’s about two sexually expressive people flirting. That’s it. At no point in the song does the male narrator imply that he’s willing or going to bypass consent. The idea that it’s about the “blurred lines of consent” was projected onto it by people who came to the song with prior hangups. The “blurred line” he’s referring to is the line of knowing or not knowing if the person you’re flirting with is into you. Like, “I’m pretty sure I know you want it, but you haven’t expressly said so, so we’re still in this hazy flirting territory.” He doesn’t say — at all, ever — “I know you want it, and whether or not that’s actually true, I’m going to take it.” But nonetheless, that’s what it was made out to be. Keep reading »

Frisky Rant: Please Stop Bragging About Your Husband On Facebook

Frisky Rant: Please Stop Bragging About Your Husband On Facebook

When women brag on Facebook about having the “best hubby in the world,” I want to buy advance tickets and popcorn to their inevitable divorce. If you really and truly love your husband and you’re actually that happy, why do you need to show off? Is Facebook your own personal delusion billboard?

Like when did husbanding (as opposed to husbandry, something else entirely) become a competition in which your husband is suddenly The Greatest Of All Husbands simply because he exchanged paper money for shiny baubles or, I don’t know, fixed the shower head? And why do you need to send out a massive brag to your “friends”? If it’s such a big deal, can’t you just tell them over the phone or in person? Keep reading »

Frisky Rant: I Get Laid Plenty, And I’m Still A Feminist

Frisky Rant: I Get Laid Plenty, And I'm Still A Feminist

Guys, close your eyes and imagine this.  You’re just trying to go about your life and do your thing, but there’s this chick who keeps tapping you on the shoulder to tell you really dumb, childish things.  She’ll say stuff like, “Hey, your shorts are stupid, and you look like shit in them.”  When you tell her she’s being an asshole, she claims you’re uptight and replies: “You just need to get laid!”

What the hell sense does that make, right?  The idea is that somehow you having sex will make you feel less angry about her being objectively rude.

This is a real thing that happened to me recently.  A guy made a blanket statement on social media that all women look like shit in high-waisted shorts and that we should all stop wearing them.  I pointed out that A) there’s a long history of men telling women what to wear that’s been detrimental toward our relationships with our bodies, and that’s sexist and uncool, B) we couldn’t possibly please everyone with what we wear because everyone’s got different tastes, so most people just wear what they want because they like it, and C) it’s rude to tell people they look like shit, especially when they didn’t ask for your opinion.  The response I got was two-fold: “You’re a cunt,” and “You obviously need to get laid.” Keep reading »

Frisky Rant: Stop Being So Damn Disgusting In The Company Bathroom, Ladies

frisky-rant-stop-being-disgusting-in-bathrooms

I write this to you in the heat of the moment, still disgusted at what I just witnessed in the company ladies room. IT WAS NOT PRETTY. In fact, after slurping down several tall glasses of Long Island Iced Teas during a barbecue yesterday, I was forced to stop at a seedy, highway rest stop McDonald’s to pee, and I’m sad to report that their women’s restroom was cleaner than the one in my office building. But this isn’t just happening in my building. Gag-worthy workplace bathrooms— particularly ladies’ rooms— have become an epidemic. We can all relate. Keep reading »

Frisky Rant: On Guys Who Don’t Read Books By Women

Frisky Rant: On Guys Who Don't Read Books By Women
Hot/Not Hot Books
Guys tell us what they like/ don't like to see on a girl's book shelf. Read More »

It wasn’t long after I started using OK Cupid in late 2012 that I realized I was just looking at the same guy over and over and over. Bearded, goofy, self-effacing, liberal arts major, non-religious, burgeoning career, presents as worldly — basically, hipsters. But that’s not why I say “the same guy.”  I say “the same guy” because all of them had, unfailingly, exactly the same taste in literature: Thomas Pynchon, Jorge Luis Borges, David Foster Wallace, Don DeLillo, Jonathan Franzen, Haruki Murakami, Junot Diaz, Charles Bukowski, Cormac McCarthy, Albert Camus, and Philip Roth, with a smattering of Hemingway, Thoreau, Tolstoy, Kafka, and Vonnegut to give props to the giants.

Not once did I ever see these men list Margaret Atwood, Maya Angelou, Barbara Kingsolver, Harper Lee, Alice Walker, Toni Morrison, Flannery O’Connor, Eudora Welty, Zora Neale Hurston, Joan Didion, Annie Dillard, Bharati Mukerjee, Jamaica Kincaid, Annie Proulx, Susan Sontag, Joyce Carol Oates, or Zadie Smith.  Not even Charlotte Bronte.  Not even Mary Shelley. Keep reading »

Frisky Rant: Sorry Kid, You’re Not The Man Of The House

Sorry Kid, You're Not The Man Of The House

A few months ago, I was having a rough time with my son. This is not unusual, as he is going through a particularly ornery stage and I am stubborn as a mule who is really good at yelling but not much else in the discipline realm. I ended up calling my parents for backup, and put them on the phone with my son as I stood in the bathroom listening to the conversation. Most of it was great. My dad was telling my son that he needs to listen to me because I’m the Mom and I have his best interests at heart and all that. But then! Then he told my son that he needed to change his behavior because he is “the man of the house,” and I “need” him to take care of me and our home. And that’s when I almost punched a hole through the wall. Keep reading »

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