Tag Archives: football

The End Zone: Is Thursday Night Football Too Much Football?

The End Zone: Is Thursday Night Football Too Much Football?

There comes a point right around this time of the season where a thought runs through my brain that I would never dare utter out loud: “This is too much football.” We just wrapped Week 5, are close to being midway through the season, and even though I just spent the entire summer lamenting the lack of exciting sports to watch (sorry, baseball, until October, you’re a distant third to “Law & Order: SVU” reruns), between Thursday Night Football, games all day Sunday, and Monday Night Football on top of that – it all gets a little overwhelming. Keep reading »

Pigskins & Zodiac Signs: Eclipses, Mercury Retrograde & Other Astrological Events That Could Impact Your Game

Pigskins & Zodiac Signs: 5 Football Teams To Watch This Season (According To Astrology)

Nothing is safe from the power of the universe. No matter how much time and effort you put into practice, working out strategies or considering all mortal variables, you can’t prevent nature and the cosmos from doing its thing. Football fans and players alike, take note of the upcoming line-up of planetary punts and cosmic interceptions that could impact you and your favorite team. Keep reading »

The End Zone: Is Tom Brady Too Old For Professional Football?

“Oh god, Tom Brady, what are you doing?” That was the prevalent thought across most football fans minds – even the ones that loathe the New England Patriots with every fiber of their being – after Tom Brady fumbled his way through a disastrous game against the Kansas City Chiefs, playing arguably the worst game of his career. But one disastrous game can be written off – whereas the Patriots shaky offense all season might be cause for a bigger worry: is Tom Brady too old to keep playing at an elite quarterback level? Keep reading »

ESPN Will Have An All-Male Panel On Domestic Violence Tonight, Which I’m Sure Will Be Incredibly Thorough [UPDATED]

Tonight, the pre-show for Monday Night Football will feature a panel discussion about domestic violence. It will include, as Ben Collins points out at Esquire, the perspectives of 11 middle-aged-and-up men, and not a single woman. He goes on to dismantle Bill Simmons’ suspension from the network for calling Roger Goodell a liar and the network’s general posturing and censorship of dissenters and women.

What’s the point of this panel? It’s going to be a meaningless bummer. Hear me out: Everyone — everyone – knows that the only reason ESPN is bothering with it is to make it appear as if they’re “covering” the recent rash of domestic violence incidents and “addressing” their female audience, but it’s an empty gesture if their female audience isn’t even represented by a woman. What would happen if they didn’t bother and just had their normal pre-game show? It’s not like they’d get sued, and no one would say that they’re any more irresponsible than they’ve been demonstrating themselves to be with their crappy “coverage” of the issue anyway. I mean, hell, at this point, the better damage control would seem to be to just not address the issue at all and just let the rest of the world criticize them for that instead of making repeated and tremendous missteps like having Stephen Smith air his victim-blaming opinions about Janay Rice, suspending Bill Simmons for making an attempt at actual sports journalism, and now hosting an all-male panel on an issue that mainly affects women. Keep reading »

The 11 Funniest Names In Football (Past & Present)

The 11 Funniest Names In Football (Past And Present)

A few weeks ago, I was watching the Packers- Seahawks game, when it sounded like the commentator referred to one of the Green Bay players as “Ha Ha Clinton-Dix.” All of a sudden, I was paying close attention because I thought I missed an inappropriate political joke. When the announcers continued to say it, I immediately Googled Ha Ha Clinton-Dix to find that he is, in fact, a Safety on the Packers. BEST. NAME. EVER. Now, whenever one of my friends sends me a funny text message, instead of replying “Ha Ha,” I send them a photo of my favorite new player. But he’s not the only man with an unfortunate moniker to grace the NFL. Here are 11 players, both past and present, whose names alone make watching football worthwhile. Keep reading »

The End Zone: The 5 Types Of People In Your Fantasy League

The End Zone: The 5 Types Of People In Your Fantasy League

We’re coming up on Week 4, the season is almost a third over already, and if you’re in a fantasy league, this means you’ve had plenty of time to see the true colors of the people you fake-own football teams with: and as it turns out, that color is obnoxious. If you have the misfortune of being a slave to your lineup week in and week out, you’ve probably met one, or all, of these fantasy league jerks before. Keep reading »

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