Most of us tend to portray a glossed over picture of our lives online. We cherry pick what we share and make sure our lives look like the best thing since sliced bread. With online dating, things are no different. We’re trying to present the best picture of ourselves as possible so we leave some things out and stretch the truth with others.
For instance, I claim to be really good at playing the bass guitar. This used to be true, but now less so. I leave out what many consider a red flag, that my best friend is a woman. I’m an inch taller online as well. The pictures I posted vary in age from being a week old to several years old but I look the same. Overall, it’s a pretty accurate depiction of me and, to me, it’s an acceptable level of massaging the truth. Some individuals, though, take significantly more liberties with the truth. Keep reading »
Earlier this month, Susannah admitted that she can tell how a date will go within the first three seconds. Turns out, she’s only about four seconds faster than average at sizing up a potential mate. Linda Blair, clinical psychologist and author of Straight Talking, says: “‘It takes only seven seconds for us to judge another person when we first meet them,” explaining that this subconscious behavior goes back to our “primitive roots when we couldn’t afford to make wrong decisions.” Judi James, author of The Body Language Bible, agrees, and explains: “We’re looking primarily to see if we should feel threatened, but we also make several assumptions about attraction and personality. … Because we tend to be time-poor, we use assumption as a short-cut, meaning if you don’t get it right first time you might not get another chance.”
This not only spells potential trouble for the person we’re sizing up, but it can be disastrous for us when we’re the ones being judged. After the jump, a few expert tips for passing the seven-second test yourself. Keep reading »
How long does it take to make a first impression? 15 seconds? 7 seconds? 3 seconds? I’ve been doing some dating lately (FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, SOMEONE HELP ME), and I’ve come to the conclusion that I can tell how a date is going to go within the first three seconds. My shrink thinks this is poppycock, some fantasy of omnipotence, but what does he know? In any case, I believe — and this is the key — that if I’m totally honest with myself, I know exactly how the date will go virtually immediately: the second I set eyes on the guy.
When you go on a first date, is your first impression usually right or wrong? Keep reading »
According to one of my former boyfriends, he absolutely hated me when first we met. I have to say the feeling was mutual. I had just gotten off a red-eye from New York to London and was tired, cranky, and hadn’t showered. No wonder he didn’t love me right off the bat.
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