Frisky readers, I need your help putting my mom’s fears to rest. Today, she sent me a link to an article on AlterNet about a recent New York Times trend story that claims single folks are now asking the people they date for their credit scores on first dates. “I find this very disturbing,” my mom wrote. She wasn’t specific about what she found so disturbing, but knowing my mom the way I do, I suspect that while she’s bothered by the utter invasive shallowness of such a question, especially at such an early point in the “relationship,” she’s also grossed out by the way the credit industry is attempting to infiltrate every possible crevice of our lives.
My first instinct was to call bullshit on this trend, simply because I know how trend stories are made in the New York Times lab. Writer’s friend’s sister hears random weird story over brunch in Brooklyn + press release for new-ish website/book/study related to the topic landing in writer’s inbox in same two week period = IT’S A TREND! See previous NY Times’ trend stories on dresses, man buns, Big Buck Hunter and bangs for proof that NY Times trend stories are either about things that are not trends at all or were trends, like, a year and a half ago. Keep reading »
I once had a first date where the guy told me, in this exact order, that he was “under federal investigation,” “writing a book for young people about how to live their lives,” and that he believed “women should be responsible for changing diapers.” I consider this the very, very worst first date I’ve had the misfortune to go on.
But really, that’s nothing compared to Efren Molina and Jillian Martone’s first date this past week. At the end of the evening, the couple returned to Molina’s Boca Raton house (yep, it happened in Florida!), and when he refused to say that he was her boyfriend, Martone punched him and threatened him with a knife. Molina was eventually able to fight her off and call the cops. The 35-year-old, with a previous record, was charged with aggravated assault, battery and burglary. She is currently in jail awaiting bail. Keep reading »
Spring is in the air! Time to emerge from hibernation, single ladies — dating season has begun! But dinner and a movie or meeting a dude for a drink is just so boring. I hereby vow that my next first date is going to be something different and unique so, at the very least, I have a good time even if I don’t necessarily make a love connection. (Best case scenario — both occur? Awesome!) I came up with 25 date ideas that don’t simply involve a restaurant, movie ticket, or bar tab. Keep reading »
First dates can be awkward, so it’s good to find common interests, like long walks on the beach or petty crime.
Florida police arrested two teenagers last week for allegedly attempting a “dine-and-ditch” after the couple enjoyed their first date.
Authorities say that Devin Norling, 18, and Sydney Sanders, 19, were just finishing up their meal at the Indian River Mall T.G.I. Friday’s when they began plotting to avoid the $25.16 bill, the TCPalm reports. Read more…
First dates are like job interviews. If you say the wrong thing, or fail to groom, or act like an obnoxious loon, then chances are good you’re going to stay unemployed. When you’re on that first date, be on your best behavior.
This list of dumb first date mistakes is meant to help. Because we care. Don’t make any of these mistakes, and your first date will probably be a smashing success.
And trust us: plenty of people make these mistakes. They text at the table, or smell like belly button lint, or ask intensely personal questions. These people don’t deserve to be in a relationship. Don’t be one of these people. Avoid these 10 dumb first date mistakes. Read more… Keep reading »
You’re on a first date — should you do it? Run to the bathroom and whip out this flowchart to help you decide. [Rosie Says] Keep reading »
Ladies, get ready, I’m about to have a TMI moment with y’all. A couple of months ago, I went on a date with a guy, and we seemed to really be hitting it off. He made a comment about coming back to my house when we finished up our drinks, and I was really into the idea, but I didn’t want him to get the wrong vibe about what might go down, so I flirtatiously told him that I was up for it, but I wasn’t going to sleep with him. And. He. Flipped. Out.
He turned to me and said, “Just think about how this sounds” and then repeated my words back to me. “I’m not going to have sex with you tonight.” And oh, boy, was he right. It sounded HARSH. Way harsh, Tai. (“Clueless” reference alert!) I was suddenly on the verge of tears. I felt like a major jerk! And so presumptuous! Had I totally blown it? But then, what was I supposed to do? I mean, I was just trying to avoid some really awkward making out moment. My intentions were good!
So, I figured I’d ask a few of the thoughtful gents on my IM list what they prefer women do in those sorts of scenarios. And boy, were the results mixed. The general consensus though, was I probably shouldn’t have handled it quite that way. Lesson learned. It’s a good thing I’ve only been doing things this way for oh, the last 15 years or so. (Blergh).
After the jump, guy advice on how to handle the awkward first (or second date) sex chat. Keep reading »
Whoever decided that asking for someone’s ‘number’ would be a good way to find out their sexual history must really suck at dating and wants everyone else to suck at it too. Springing this question on a person is confusing and it should stop right now!
While out on the town, a guy I was seeing asked what my ‘number’ was and when I jokingly replied with 867-5309 he looked at me with disgust, walked away and I never heard from him again. What could’ve gone wrong? He said he loved to kid around. Silly me! I reflected after sobbing during my lonely taxi ride home, he must’ve been referring to my sex digits, not my telephone digits. How the heck was I supposed to know that? Read more… Keep reading »
Don’t: Misrepresent yourself. While online dating is a valuable resource for the savvy single, there are people out there who misrepresent themselves. Don’t be one of them. Just as your online dating profile should accurately represent who you really are, your in-person encounters should be equally authentic. Don’t pretend to be something or someone you’re not to try and impress a potential partner. You’re fabulous just as you are and if somebody else can’t see that, it’s their loss. Besides, a relationship founded on lies and/or insincerities will quickly crumble.
Keep reading »
How long does it take to make a first impression? 15 seconds? 7 seconds? 3 seconds? I’ve been doing some dating lately (FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, SOMEONE HELP ME), and I’ve come to the conclusion that I can tell how a date is going to go within the first three seconds. My shrink thinks this is poppycock, some fantasy of omnipotence, but what does he know? In any case, I believe — and this is the key — that if I’m totally honest with myself, I know exactly how the date will go virtually immediately: the second I set eyes on the guy.
When you go on a first date, is your first impression usually right or wrong? Keep reading »