If you call yourself a “feminist”—which basically means you believe women deserve the dignity, rights and respect afforded to men—then you can relate to how peeps come out of the woodwork to tell you you’re either being “too feminist” or “not feminist” enough. Some people think feminism should be a spartan existence where there’s no frivolity allowed, on principle: no makeup, no “Sex & The City, and definitely no getting married!

The dumbest criticism of feminists we’ve ever seen happened when some people freaked out over the engagement of Jessica Valenti, co-founder of Feministing (and one-time Frisky blog!) to her boyfriend, Andrew Golis, deputy publisher of the politics blog, Talking Points Memo. Gettin’ hitched, apparently, is “antithetical” to feminism.

Sex can sell almost anything in our culture, so football shouldn’t be any different. At least, that’s what the Lingerie Football League, LFL, is banking on. The idea for the LFL was hatched from the “Lingerie Bowl,” a half-time show featuring scantily dressed women that is broadcast during the Super Bowl. The league, which opens its debut season Sept. 4, has 10 teams (with names like San Diego Seduction, Dallas Desire, and Los Angeles Temptation) competing in seven-a-side, full-contact football. The players want to be respected even though they wear sports bras, tiny boyshorts, and protective gear. They say they’re playing real football, regardless of their attire, and those who tried out and couldn’t play didn’t make the cut.

If you’re wondering who thought it was a good idea for Bristol Palin, pregnant at 17, to warn America’s teens not to have sex until they’re married, you’re not alone.

But it’s hard to figure out what, exactly, the well-meaning adults who preach “no sex until marriage” to teenagers are thinking, considering a 2007 study confirmed abstinence-only education does not work.

Jessica Valenti, editor of Feminsting.com and author of The Purity Myth: How America’s Obsession With Virginity Is Hurting Young Women, has written a piece for The Nation about how the groups that comprise what Valenti calls “the virginity movement” have finally realized they need new PR.

Unfortunately, the abstinence preachers’ ideas for discouraging teens from having sex still don’t make any sense.

It’s like a word association game. Say the word “asexual” and the first thing people say is Clay Aiken. Poor Clay got stuck as the poster boy for asexuality when he told New York magazine that he had no libido.

“I just don’t have an interest in … any of that at all. I have got too much on my plate. I’d rather focus on one thing and do that when I can devote time to it, and right now, I just don’t have any desire. I think maybe I don’t [have sexual urges]! I mean, not really. I’ve just kind of shut it off, maybe. Is that bad?”

Now we know Clay is actually a gay man and the only thing he had “shut off” were his homosexual desires.

But with such confusing messages about asexuality, is it any wonder that “Awkward,” a 19-year-old woman who wrote to Professor Foxy, Feministing’s sex advice expert, was really confused by her complete lack of a libido? “Awkward” thinks she is asexual, but wondered how do you actually know?

Sigh. We remember back when Feministing was just Jessica Valenti’s small third wave feminist blog with a couple of her friends. But now one of our favorite blogs rolls nine bloggers deep and is turning five years old!

The anniversary bash will be held on June 12 in New York City.  If you’re not in the NYC area but still love Feministing, you can buy a ticket that the bloggers will donate to a partier who can’t afford to go.

If a night of debauchery with folks who aren’t afraid to use the F-word (feminist, duh) isn’t enough to bring you out, the party will even host a special guest appearance from Kathleen Hanna of Le Tigre and Bikini Kill! So get your tickets now, alright? [Feministing]

A UK based academic says feminism should be taught in schools. As a feminist blogger, I couldn’t agree more. Dr. Jessica Ringrose at the Institute of Education in London has made the rounds recently, suggesting that feminism should be taught in schools to combat the increased sexualization of girls in the media and to give girls role models outside of celebrities like Paris Hilton and Britney Spears. Ringrose suggests teaching girls about historic feminist leaders, like suffragists, to balance out all the tripe they’re getting through pop culture. While I’m all about teaching feminism to younger girls (hell, start them in kindergarten!), as others have noted, I think we’re better off showing girls what kinds of amazing feminist action is happening right now.

There’s a lecture and book signing on November 13 in Washington, D.C., featuring a few noted authors and journalists discussing how “hook-up” culture on campus has led to rising numbers of sexual assaults, date rapes, and sexually transmitted infections. Included on the panel is Washington Post scribe Laura Sessions Stapp who coined the term “gray rape” to describe sexual encounters that are not quite consensual but not totally denied either. Her theory was discussed in further detail in an article in September’s Cosmopolitan, which garnered loads of debate on sites like Jezebel and Feministing. Suffice it to say, we’re not sure we’d take the thoughts of someone who thinks having sex with someone while they’re passed out drunk is “gray” rape all that seriously.