• Conan O’Brien is the subject of pissy Tweets by plus-sized actresses Kirstie Alley and Star Jones after cracking jokes about Alley’s size. Example? A recent earthquake drill in California might have just been a response to Alley jazzercising. [New York Daily News]—Ah, fat jokes: the province of lazy comedians. Maybe he could mix up his repertoire and do ugly jokes, too? And for her part, maybe Alley could practice what she preaches and stop drawing so much attention to her own weight.
• An analysis by George Washington University’s School of Public Health and Health Services found that the Stupak-Pitts Amendment to Obama’s health care reform bill would “produce industry-wide effects, leading to the elimination of health plan coverage for nearly all medically indicated abortions.” The GW study arrived at this conclusion after examining how “the health benefits services industry adjusts its products over time to conform to the regulatory environment in which it operates.” [George Washington University Medical Center]

• Jaycee Dugard’s family has spoken out against adult filmmaker Shane Ryan, who is at work on a pornographic film called “Abducted Girl: An American Sex Slave,” based on Dugard’s ordeal. In a statement, the Dugards’ spokeswoman called the film “exploitive, hurtful and breathtakingly unkind.” [New York Daily News]
• Poor women in developing countries will be most negatively affected by global warming, according to a new report by the United Nations Population Fund. Weather-related natural disasters are likely to affect how they get their food, water and energy. [BBC]

Even though Paris is the fashion capitol of the world, it is still technically against the law for a woman to wear pants there. Someone should tell the police quick … they could have made a killing during Fashion Week. But seriously, how crazy is that? This ridiculous law has survived years of attempted upheaval. In 1892, the law was amended to say that trousers were permitted “as long as the woman is holding the reins of a horse.” In 1909, female cyclists were declared exempt. After a couple more attempts over the ages, I guess the ladies (and police) forgot the law even existed and went right on ahead breaking it by proudly rocking their pants. That got me thinking. What other crazy kinds of laws are there that we don’t even know about? Wait for this one. I discovered that here in New York a woman can incur $25 fine for flirting! Oops … I broke that law like a million times. After the jump, some more archaic lady laws that need to be repealed pronto. [Newser, Dumblaws]

• Specialist Alexis Hutchinson, an Army cook, was arrested by military police and contained at Hunter Army Airfield in Savannah, Georgia, after she refused deployment to Afghanistan by not showing up for her flight. Hutchinson, a 21-year-old single mother, said she hasn’t been able to find care for her 10-month-old son, Kamani, while she is gone, explaining that her mother is overwhelmed by caring for three sick relatives. Hutchinson’s attorney said one of her superiors told her Kamani would be placed in foster care if Hutchinson couldn’t find care during her deployment. A spokesperson for Hunter Army Airfield said he does not know what Hutchinson was told by her superior, but she wouldn’t be deployed unless she could find Kamani care. Hutchinson’s mother ended up flying from California to Georgia to pick up Kamani anyway, since her daughter could face charges from the Army for going AWOL. [AP]

Have you ever entertained the idea of ripping off your bra in a moment of feminist passion? I know I have. What better way to express female rebellion against oppressive ideologies? What better way to salute our bra-burning foremothers in a proud act of solidarity and continuity? But then I think to myself, “It’s too cliché. Feminists have been there and done that.” That’s why I was pretty shocked to discover that this particularly irreverent act of bra-burning never actually happened. Huh?

• One month before late-term abortion provider Dr. George Tiller was murdered by an anti-choice extremist, the FBI in Kansas City received an anonymous letter warning them that Scott Roeder posed a physical threat to abortion providers. The FBI said they didn’t heed the letter as a credible threat, apparently because the letter writer was involved in a custody battle with Roeder. [The Wichita Eagle]

• Tony Alamo, a 75-year-old evangelist preacher, has been sentenced to 175 years in prison for taking underage girls as “child brides” and molesting them. Alamo apparently threatened the girls with “the loss of their salvation.” [NY Daily News]
• Some pregnant women are forgoing the H1N1 vaccine, saying they are more comfortable with holistic approaches, like acupuncture, yoga and “obsessive hand washing,” to fend off the swine flu. [Chicago Tribune]
• An 18-year-old female student at Loyola University recanted an allegation made this morning that she was sexually assaulted after drinking with three men in her dorm room last night. Police said she was being evaluated at a local hospital. [ChicagoBreakingNews.com]—I wonder if she was copycatting the young woman who lied about a gang rape at Hofstra.

• “Pleasure is in your own hands” is the new pro-masturbation slogan used by a sex ed program in the Extremadura region of Spain. The campaign has upset some Catholics in the country, despite having received funding from local youth and women’s affairs ministries. [Guardian UK]
• The federal government released a report on Tuesday which found that DNA evidence culled from “rape kits,” which are performed when a victim visits an emergency room or doctor’s office after a rape, are often never sent to crime labs. A CBS news investigation found that when raped kids are not tested for months or even years, the rapists are walking free and continuing to commit crimes. [CBS News]

“If I feel it’s appropriate to show some nudity in the scenes then I go for it. As much as I use my sexuality, I have never felt exploited. I feel like it’s on my terms and I have no problem with it.”

That’s actress Eva Mendes, who stars in the upcoming “Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans,” on going naked in the movies. If she’s in control of her sexuality, her theory goes, how can she be exploited? Cinematical’s Peter Kaplan agrees:

“Speaking as someone who first noticed Mendes when Ethan Hawke opened a door in ‘Training Day’ to reveal her lying naked on a bed, I say: ‘I have no problem with it, either.’”

One imagines Broadsheet’s Kate Harding would not concur.

Almost a week after the Fort Hood massacre that made police Sgt. Kimberly Munley a hero, the details of the ghastly shootout seem to only be getting more confusing. Kimberly might not actually have shot Nidal Malik Hasan four times while catching one of his bullets herself—the story that was presented the day after the shooting. An anonymous witness is now saying that police Senior Sgt. Mark Todd brought Major Terrifying down after Kimberly collapsed from gunshot wounds.

This is reminding many people of Jessica Lynch.

• Cynthia Stewart, a 17-year-old junior in Alabama, event planner on the prom committee and out lesbian, allegedly asked her high school principal if she could bring her girlfriend as her date and was told no. When Stewart’s aunt/guardian appealed the principal’s decision to the school board, they let it stand. Happy prom, kids! [Feministing]
• For the first time ever, the Mormon church has announced support for gay rights legislation by speaking up for Salt Lake City laws which would ban discrimination against gays in housing and employment. The church still says it doesn’t support gay marriage, though. [CBSNews.com]

On Monday night, at the Glamour “Women of the Year” awards, Amy Poehler told the girls of America, “If boys say something that’s not funny, you don’t have to laugh.” Sure, it was said with humor and naturally she got a laugh from the crowd, but her advice really hit me. As women, we are taught to be polite, to laugh at men and their jokes, and to sacrifice and compromise ourselves for the sake of their egos. That’s why Amy’s comment was profound—its meaning was multi-layered. Not only was she encouraging us to honor ourselves but she was also urging us to find something that makes us laugh—to make our own comedy. And that’s exactly what she’s been doing since she made the transition from “SNL” to a show conceptualized, written, produced, and acted by her—“Parks and Recreation.” If you haven’t seen it yet, you should.

• In this video clip, Senator Kirsten Gillibrand (D-NY) speaks out against the health care reform bill’s Stupak-Pitts Amendment, which limits how private insurance companies can offer coverage for abortion. More conservatively inclined Democrats voted for the House of Representative’s version of the health care bill this past Saturday night only after the Stupak-Pitts Amendment was included. The video is a little snoozy at first, but 45 seconds in, Sen. Gillibrand gets to the good stuff about why Stupak-Pitts isn’t good for our reproductive rights. [YouTube]
• Speaking of the Stupak-Pitts Amendment, Senator Barbara Boxer (D-CA) has said today that the Senate has the 60 votes needed to block the controversial bill when it makes its way to there. Let’s hope so. [Huffington Post]

• The city of Richmond, California, is struggling to deal with the horrific gang rape of a 15-year-old girl, which allegedly had up to 20 witnesses, outside a homecoming dance. For some in Richmond, this means blaming the victim and criticizing the “snitches” who put seven of the alleged rapists in jail. [NY Times]
• A study of 13,000 high school students found girls who play team sports are less likely to smoke, be depressed, and use marijuana. Unfortunately, it also says boys who play team sports are more likely to behave violently and binge drink. [ABC News]

• Marilyn Manson has an extremely disturbing new video for his song “Running To The Edge of the World” where he murders a bikini-clad woman who looks like his ex, Evan Rachel Wood. I guess it wasn’t enough for Marilyn to tell Spin after their breakup, “I have fantasies every day about smashing her skull with a sledgehammer.” [You Tube]
Polish bikini model-slash-“Dancing With The Stars” contestant Joanna Krupa says posing for Playboy is feminist because so many women are involved in the photo shoot. I have to admit she’s got some good points in the interview. [Fox News]

Have you ever heard of Karen Salmansohn? Neither had I, until I read an article of hers on Oprah.com, Googled her, and then discovered she had written 29 freaking books, including one called How To Be Happy, Dammit. Sounds like an expert on, uh, something right? On Oprah.com, Salmansohn has written a piece called “Are You A Feminist Or A Feminine-ist?” which has led me to conclude she is an expert in being idiotic. “Feminine-ist” and “feminine-ism” are terms she’s desperate to get in to the lexicon, but she doesn’t make much of a case for their inclusion, in my opinion. For starters, there’s her definition of feminine-ism: “This energy of simply being by indulging in a meditative and self-nurturing manicure, a facial or a hot bubble bath.” So feminine-ism is about going to a spa? And why is “feminine-ism” so desperately needed? She explains:

“I see too many women these days rushing around trying to do it all, but meanwhile they’re not being it all! They’re not being their fullest, best feminine selves. Instead, they’re being tougher than they’d like to be as well as more exhausted, strident and irritable, thereby feeling unattractive inside and out. All while suffering from guilt over the stuff they did not manage to squeeze into their over-booked schedules.”

We write often about domestic abuse issues here on The Frisky and the discussions get quite heated. Those of you readers who get very passionate about the subject absolutely must read the story “Men’s Rights’ Groups Have Become Frighteningly Effective” by journalist Kathryn Joyce on Double X, about the rise of the “men’s movement.” Many men’s rights groups sound innocuous enough at face value. Who’s against men’s rights? Who’s against reporting domestic violence accurately? Who’s against letting dads see their kids? But on closer inspection, writes Joyce, their causes are pretty sleazy: they often seek to discredit women who report abuse and advocate for sharing custody of children on principle, regardless of prior criminal history of the father. Some of these men are utter nutters. One men’s rights blogger Joyce interviewed for her article told her he would refer to her not by her name but by the title “Feminist E,” because he does not use real names for feminists. He thinks men “must verbally oppose [them ]... until our flesh oxidizes into dust.” Uh-huh. Right.

An article in the New York Times this week about women-only apartment buildings in New York City brought back memories of my first college dorm way back in the mid-‘90s. It was the only remaining all-girls dorm on campus and I was in the last class of freshmen to live there before it became co-ed. I didn’t choose the dorm and I wasn’t happy when I was assigned to it; I remember feeling especially frustrated that I’d finally escaped the clutches of my over-protective mother only to be stuck in a place where I had to sign-in every male guest, escort them in the halls and elevators, and make sure they left the building before 11 p.m. Lame! Of course, back then basically the only guys who were interested in hanging out with me were my plethora of gays who liked to watch “Ricki Lake” on my tiny 13-inch TV and gossip about our mutual friends. What can I say? I was a hag at a young age. I doubt it was any coincidence that the next year, when I moved into a co-ed dorm, I finally branched out and actually started dating straight guys who liked making out with me instead of just counseling me on how to wear my hair. All this is to say I couldn’t imagine living in an apartment as a grown woman where the same rules that I had to abide by when I was 18 applied.

• Emma Thompson initially signed a petition calling for Roman Polanski’s freedom, but has she had a change of heart? A reader at the blog Shakesville may have convinced her to remove her name from his list of supporters. [Shakesville]
• An Illinois judge has blocked the enforcement of the state’s controversial parental notification law, which mandates that a physician inform a parent or guardian if a minor age 17 or younger seeks an abortion. The law was blocked through a temporary restraining order by the American Civil Liberties Union of Illinois. [Chicago Breaking News]

• Illinois’ controversial parental notification law for minors seeking an abortion has been delayed at least until Wednesday morning as officials meet to verify that girls can waive the notification process by petitioning a judge, who has 48 hours to rule on it. The parental notification law does not give parents consent, but requires that they be notified. An exemption is made in the case of a medical emergency or if a girl puts it in writing that she was sexually abused. [Chicago Tribune]