When a woman attempts to find some semblance of “having it all,” she automatically becomes demonized. We can’t seem to rise up in the ranks — whether it’s in the corporate world or in politics — without our personal lives, particularly our mothering skills, being called into question.
The latest female politician in the hot seat is Texas State Senator Wendy Davis, who is running for governor on the Democratic ticket. She has recently been skewered (again) for having been both a young mother and a single mother. The focus circumventing her actual politics (like her support for women’s reproductive rights) and instead revolve around how she is as a mother. A reporter for Fusion even asked Davis to respond to a blog post by Sarah Palin’s daughter Bristol Palin — seriously, her — that called Davis a woman “whose ambition and ego were so big she couldn’t have both a career and kids at the same time.” Both Jessica Luther and Carolyn Edgar wrote insightful pieces this week explaining why these allegations are egregious, erroneous, and just plain clueless.
I could spend hours picking apart what is wrong about these attacks. Instead, I’d like to note that we hardly ever see male politicians skewered for their parenting. We look past that aspect of their personal lives — for the most part, barring a mistress or financial scandal — and focus on their politics. A male politician who is also a father gets to be, first and foremost, a male politician. But a female politician who is also a mother? It’s completely different. Keep reading »
It’s not hard to understand why this picture went viral: 39-year-old Doyin Richards and his kids are pretty damn cute. As Doyin explained on his blog, Daddy Doin Work, his wife usually does his two-year-old daughter’s hair in the mornings but one day she was running late. He was on paternity leave in October, when the picture was taken, and offered to style the girl’s hair. His wife scoffed. So he set up a camera to capture himself with their six-month-old strapped in a pouch and the little girl getting her hair did by Daddy. Once it got picked up by The Good Men Project, it quickly went viral. But a picture like this, while adorable, shouldn’t be extraordinary. It should just be parenting. Keep reading »
Kate Winslet has threatened a lawsuit against Fathers4Justice, a fathers’ rights group, after they used comments she made about her parenting arrangement with two of her children’s fathers in Vogue for a Christmastime advertisement. Kate told the magazine that her kids (13-year-old daughter Mia and nine-year-old son Joe) live with her instead of being shuttled between parents. Keep reading »
A a new study conducted by anthropologists at Emory University set out to determine why some fathers take to the job more than others. Naturally, they decided to study their balls. The study looked at 70 biological fathers who had a child between the ages of one and two, and who were living with the child and its biological mother. Researchers looked at the fathers’ parenting habits, their testosterone levels, their brains functions when shown pictures of their children and the size of their testes and found that the men with lower testosterone levels and smaller balls were better dads. Keep reading »
“I was a little shit … I was really a kid who spent most of the time outside, catching turtles and frogs and stuff like that…That’s pretty much all I did as a kid … It’s really important to us that we don’t raise an entitled little brat …We want to raise a kid who’s confident, compassionate, and it’s really important that we do that, so it’s important that I set a good example for him.”
– Anxious father-to-be Josh Duhamel talks about how he plans to raise his little Ferglet. We’re anxious too because it seems like Fergie’s been preggo forever. We want to see that bebe — who we hope looks like Josh, but doesn’t inherit his “little shit” genes. [People]
When it comes to mothering and the so-called “Mommy Wars,” the one debate that will seemingly never die is the one centered around breastfeeding. I’ve written extensively about breastfeeding in the past, and in my day job I work on finding accessible ways to educate pregnant women about breastfeeding, in the hopes that they’ll at least be open to trying it out once their baby is born. I’m of the mind that “breast is best,” but I’m also painfully aware that we as a country and society do not make it easy in the slightest for women —particularly working women or those from lower socio-economic backgrounds— to breastfeed. I was a big fan of this year’s World Breastfeeding Week and I try and support women who want to breastfeeding but lack resources/information/help. I also try to support and provide information for pregnant women who aren’t sure about whether they will nurse or not. And, when possible, I help connect parents who want their babies to have breast milk with mothers who have an excess supply. I also will not shame, harass, or harangue a woman who chooses to or needs to formula feed their baby for whatever reason.
I will, however, call out someone who uses faulty logic as reasoning for not nursing her hypothetical future child. Karla A. Erickson’s “Explaining Why, Next Time, I Won’t Breastfeed” was a recent op/ed in the Iowa Press-Citizen that purports to use breastfeeding as the cause of uneven and unequal division of labor when it comes to parenting. Keep reading »
Have a young girl in your life? Then here’s a blog post that you’ll want to email to her parent right now. Houston Press writer Jef With One F was appalled by all the garbage he had been reading online about the pro-abstinence “purity” movement, which teaches girls and young women they are only “pure” if they are virgins and that their fathers should be guardians of their sexuality until that responsibility is handed over to their future husband. It’s creepy, it’s heteronormative, and it’s paternalistic as hell. Oh, and it doesn’t work anyway! So Jef With One F wrote up this great listicle, “10 Things I Plan To Tell My Daughter ABout Sex That Aren’t Purity Movement Crap,” which is everything your daughters (and sons!) should hear instead, like:
You cannot be “ruined,” by an act. You can only be ruined if you let shame and self-loathing consume you, and even then there is always a path back into the light. This goes double for someone trying to convince you sex is evil. That person was either hurt badly or seriously misled.
Damn straight. Check out the whole piece for the best fatherly sex advice you can find. [Houston Press] [Image of father and daughter via Shutterstock]
“One of Nashville’s most prolific fathers.” Orlando Shaw is noodling a reality show about his 22 children by 14 different women, as well as his impending grandfatherhood by his pregnant 16-year-old daughter. He has recently signed a production deal with “a prominent Los Angeles agency” which could lead to a TV show; he’s also received “an inquiry about a possible movie.”
Shaw’s reality show, if it ever comes to fruition, wouldn’t be the first OMG WTF breeder reality TV show. There’s “19 Kids And Counting” (or however many kids they have these days) and of course every reality show about the multitudinous Kardashian Klan. And who can forget “All My Babies’ Mamas,” the never-aired reality show on Oxygen about the rapper Shawty Lo and the 10 different women he has has 12 children with. It had tens of thousands of viewers petitioning to keep it off the air. Keep reading »
Last year for Father’s Day, we ran a series of interviews with real-life dads divulging their wisdom on raising independent, vibrant girls. Dads Raising Daughters turned out really lovely, so I’m making a fledgling Frisky tradition of it! This year for fatherly parenting advice, I turned to Josh, who has two girls ages eight and five; Jim, who has a nine-year-old; and James, whose daughter is three.
Yesterday, we learned what these dads want to teach their daughters about love and dating. Today, the dads explain how they teach their girls they are strong, beautiful and powerful. Keep reading »