It’s really crazy what they’re doing with chicken these days. I mean, does this new Rip’n Chick’n from Popeyes look even remotely like something that came from a living creature? These look like bizarre fried finger tentacles of chicken, just waiting to brush your leg or arm. Which is to say, they are disgusting, and will probably be very popular. [Popeyes]
Maria Shriver loves pizza. Yes, the former first lady of California and accomplished journalist is a pizza fiend. That’s why she, along with several of her high profile friends, have invested $3 million in a new Subway-style pizza assembly fast food business called Blaze Pizza. So far, there are only two locations — in Southern California — but the chain is hoping to balloon up to at least 15 spots in the next year or so.
And here is why I am so delightfully thrilled about this. A pizza store where you can build your own pizza and have it served to you in less than five minutes? Imagine the pizzabilities! There are going to be so many new topping combos created! I hope the staff don’t mind when I set up a tent in-store and basically move into the freezer area. That’s not weird at all, right? [Bloomberg]
When I heard that Cinnabon had created a new snack treat to add to its gooey cinnamon bun empire, I was thrilled. Then I found out it was a pizza-oriented treat called a Pizzabon. Double thrilled! But then I saw the Pizzabon, and deep snackappointment (that’s snack disappointment, if you’ve never experienced it before) set in. This was not the pizza-cum-cinnamon bun treat I had envisioned. Cinnabon, with all its cinnamon bun technology, had failed to capitalize on the unique swirl shape inherent in its product. Allow me to illustrate how they failed, after the jump… Keep reading »
Carl’s Jr is currently testing a new product called the “Ice Cream Brrrger,” which is, well, exactly what it sounds like: a burger made of ice cream. We’re a little creeped out by the beefy texture of the ice cream and the dripping frosting condiments, but in the grand scheme of freaky fast foods, this ice cream/burger blend is actually pretty innocuous. Click through to check out 11 other fast food creations that are way more disturbing (hot dog pizza, anyone?!)…
Aussie mother Kylie Steger was not amused by the rude surprise inside her Hungry Jack fast food dinner. She was beyond pissed when she found a poorly drawn penis inside her hamburger box. “It literally made me sick … If they have drawn that in there, what else have they done to my burger?” Steger complained. I wonder if she would have felt differently if the penis rendering was more, well, professional. Hungry Jacks is taking the complaint “very seriously” and has launched an investigation to get to the bottom of the penis incident. I, on the other hand, can’t stop laughing. I would be thrilled if there was a penis in my box. Also, may I just point out that the name of the person who wrote this news item is Stuart Cumming. You’re welcome. [The Chronicle]
This Taco Bell tattoo is amazing for many reasons. The whimsical cursive font. The colorful star border. The flirty placement on the right shoulder. But I must admit I’m worried about the ramifications of such a permanent ode to a fast food joint. I mean, what if one day she succumbs to the salty siren song of Long John Silver’s? Awkward. [Guest of a Guest]
Pizza Hut gets into some wild stuff — really wild stuff — overseas. Its Middle Eastern branches, for example, serve an abomination known as the Crown Crust Carnival. They offer two varieties, a Chicken Fillet pizza — a pizza with chicken fillets framing the outside of it — and a cheeseburger pizza, crowned with tiny fistfuls of burgers. Delicious or revolting? [Pizza Hut]
Yesterday, Pizza Hut announced their new pizza innovation: pizza with hot dogs in the crust. After you’re done devouring your pizza, you’ve still got a hot dog cooked into the crust left to eat. It’s two delicious junk foods in one! We were really excited by the possibility [We were? -- Editor], but unfortunately it’s only available in the UK so far. Isn’t America the capital of obesity and snack innovation? What’s happening, guys? Are we slipping? In any case, we found a slew of other fast food menu items that will shock, amaze and tantalize your taste buds — if you happen to like sandwiches with sandwiches in them, and bacon-flavored everything as much as we do.
Chick Fil-A is kind of a conservative fast food company that, besides closing every Sunday to observe the Lord’s day, has also generously donated to anti-gay groups in the past. But should that stop a bunch of drag queens from enjoying a bunch of delicious fried chicken? Hell to the no. That’s why this Wilson Phillips ripoff group decided to sing a special ode to the fast food chain. The chorus? “Someday somebody’s gonna make you wanna gobble up a waffle fry, but no girl, Chick Fil-A say you’re gonna make the baby Jesus cry.” Also, will somebody reveal to me the secrets of incredible drag queen airbrush makeup techniques? These ladies look fierce. [Buzzfeed]
In a completely unofficial and gross experiment, one brave (or bored?) Redditor put McDonald’s and KFC fries in airtight jars for three years just to see how they would age. Well, no doubt Mickey D’s fries have better genes. Or do they? The French fry researcher points out that “this test is meaningless [because] too many variables are unknown to make any sort of call.” Fry guy goes on to say, “If anything, I’d be more afraid of the KFC fries because this indicates they might have been contaminated with bacteria or mold or were improperly cooked.” But wait, does the lack of mold fur on the Mickey D’s batch mean that there was some kind of crazy synthetic chemical that they’re treated with? Never mind. I don’t want to know. It doesn’t matter. I’m never eating fast food French fries again. [The Daily What]