The holidays suck extra hard when you’re trying to cope with the loss of a family member, even if you’re not a Grinch by nature. However you define your family, once someone that was an integral part of your warm and fuzzy celebrations is missing, winter brings a feeling of doom and gloom that all the vitamin D in the world can’t fix. Keep reading »
Ah, Thanksgiving: a day of gratitude, binge eating, and togetherness. Unfortunately, that whole “togetherness” thing doesn’t always go so smoothly. We all know to avoid inflammatory topics like religion and politics when convening with far-flung family members, but what happens when seemingly innocuous subjects cause tempers to flare and awkward silence to follow? To help you prepare for the worst, here’s a list of seven neutral conversation starters to try this Thanksgiving — and what to do if things turn bad…
My parents had only two rules for my brothers and me when we were growing up:
1. Don’t become a Republican.
2. Don’t join the military.
So you can imagine everyone’s shock and confusion when my fiercely liberal brother Corwin announced that he had enlisted in the Marines.
Like most freshman wives, I assumed that my mother-in-law (MIL) and I would enjoy an affable relationship, for she is no monster-in-law Jane Fonda and I am certainly no J.Lo daughter-in-law (DIL). I mean, why wouldn’t we be as close as bona fide mother and daughter? We are intelligent, respectful and kind women who care deeply for the same man. My naiveté conjured images of us laughing over tea together, trading recipes and wrinkle secrets, and bragging to anyone who would listen how we were best of friends.
One year later, that idealistic notion of a legitimate mother-daughter relationship is laughable and overrated at best. If I had a time machine, I would go back and hunt for the ultimate handbook on how to handle MILs from A-Z and read it top to bottom with a highlighter. No one warned me about the multifaceted nature and complexities of a MIL/DIL relationship. Nor did I realize the toll it would take on my marriage.
It was Saturday in the late afternoon and I was in the middle of ridding my apartment of dog hair when I heard my cell ringing over the hum of the vacuum. My iPhone screen indicated it was my mom calling. Ever since I successfully taught her how to text message a year and a half ago, the majority of our telecommunication has existed in written form, her messages nearly always signed “Love Mom” as if I wouldn’t be sure. I knew her actually calling me meant something was up.
“Hey, Mom,” I said, bringing the vacuum to a stop.
“Hi, hon,” my mom said. “Listen, I just wanted to let you know not to worry, but it looks like I’m about to be arrested.”
“David” and I have been together two years and we’ve been close friends longer than that. I have grown to love and care about him very much. We’ve even talked about marriage, but we’re waiting until we’re a bit older to make an official decision. Right now, my biggest concern is David’s family. See, David’s parents are divorced and have both remarried. I absolutely adore his fathers side, who are fun and loving and accepting of David. However, he’s only over there every other weekend because of the divorce. Otherwise, he lives with his mother who doesn’t treat him with respect that a son deserves. Keep reading »
I’m 23 years old and have been in an honest, mature relationship with my amazing and sweet boyfriend for six months. We are very compatible and it’s likely that we’ll end up moving in together in the next year or so. A few weeks ago, I got to meet his sister, who is two years younger than us and the person he’s closest to in his family. Man, was I in for a surprise! Not only did they hug each other tightly for almost a full five minutes when we met her at the airport, but he constantly had his arm around her or was holding her hand (and sometimes mine, simultaneously). The “pet name” that he calls me turned out to be a variation on his nickname for her. He even called her by my nickname and me by hers several times. He honestly looked distraught when he had to choose which one of us to sit next to. It was strange because many of his flirtatious moves, like play wrestling, tickling, picking me up, etc. were also things that he did with her! It felt … bizarre.
It appears that Jan Brady may have given middle children a bad rep. According to a new book, The Secret Power of Middle Children, they aren’t perpetually complaining about being known at school as Marcia’s younger sister and Cindy’s older sister. No, in fact author Catherine Salmon says there’s rarely “Marcia, Marcia, Marcia” issues at all. Salmon argues that middle children actually have the best place in the birth order, because they are given more leeway than their older siblings and are less coddled than their younger siblings. As a result, Salmon says that middle children tend to develop independence and creativity, plus the diplomacy skills to be leaders in business and politics. In fact, Salmon notes that 52 percent of presidents are middle children. I’m guessing if you’re a middle child, you’ll be all, “Told you so” about this news. And if you were born first or last, or happen to be an only child, you’ll probably roll your eyes a little bit. I think we can all guess where Salmon falls in her family’s birth order. [Newser] Keep reading »
“It’s not really a shock.” When a famous person dies from causes related to drug or alcohol addiction, this, or something similar, is one of the more common responses people have. While there are plenty of crueler things people can and do say, this bored and blase lack of surprise over the death of a human being tends to bother me the most.
That is because my father is an addict. He’s been an addict my entire life. And to not be shocked by someone’s death at the hands of addiction would mean I would have to have to reached some sort of placid acceptance that my dad will also inevitably suffer the same fate — that his getting “better” is out of the question. Keep reading »
On last night’s episode of “The Bachelorette,” the four remaining bachelors took Ashley home to meet their families. You can read all about the details of the episode in Kate’s recap, but the thing that stuck out most to me was the fact that each of the guys made sure to emphasize just how essential it was that their families approved of Ashley. And if they didn’t? Each dude seem to imply that not getting the thumbs up from mom, dad, and their siblings would make pursuing a more serious relationship impossible.
This was fascinating to me. There’s no doubt that having your parents like — and even love — your significant other is a wonderful thing, but I don’t know that it’s essential for me. Keep reading »
news
The Soapbox: Why Jezebel Was Wrong To Post Images Of A Woman Being Raped |
relationships
10 Played-Out Online Dating Messages That Guys Send Women |
health
I Have ADD |
|
guys
Ask A Dude: Does He Want His Ex Back? |
|
entertainment
Inside Demi Moore’s Devastating Post-Marriage Meltdown |
