Tag Archives: emotional abuse

Girl Talk: Seriously, Listen To Yourself

Girl Talk: Seriously, Listen To Yourself

A few weeks before my wedding, I was in the dinnerware section of Macy’s with my friend Sam. I was talking about all the things that were wrong with my relationship, and she asked me, “Are you sure you want to do this?”  My response: “At this point, I’ve put so much effort into this relationship that I have to make it work.”

Let’s reinterpret that: “I’m unhappy, and I know I should leave, but I’m so desperate to make all the sacrifices I’ve made worthwhile that I’m not going to.” Keep reading »

Frisky Q&A: Hip Mama Editor Ariel Gore Talks Parenthood, Abuse & Her New Memoir

ariel-gore-the-end-of-eve

Mother’s Day is when advertising distills motherhood down to home-cooked brunch, a bracelet, or a fragrant bouquet. But for far too many people, the relationship with their mom is a complicated one. Not all mothers have been nurturing and caring; not all daughters and sons have overcome the trauma of their childhoods as adults.  There can be a lot of love in a mother-child relationship, but also a deep well of pain. That’s why The End Of Eve: A Memoir, by Ariel Gore, is the perfect antidote to Mother’s Day.

Several years ago, Gore, who is the editor of Hip Mama magazine, was happily in a relationship with her partner and raising a college-aged daughter and a toddler son, when she got some news. Her narcissistic, emotionally abusive mother, Eve, announced she had cancer.

So, Gore and her family picked up their lives and moved to spend the last couple of years caring for Eve — who, in turn, made everyone’s lives difficult in every possible way, like reporting Gore and her partner to Child Protective Services for (nonexistent) child abuse. But Gore was dedicated to both caring for her sick mom and trying to keep her relationship with her girlfriend together.

As a memoirist, Ariel Gore is gifted: she is able to tell a heartbreaking story of illness and betrayal with the perfect mix of respect, humor and irreverence. I called Gore at home to talk about The End Of Eve, which I absolutely devoured. Our conversation is after the jump!

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Tommy Mottola Describes How He Abused Mariah Carey In New Memoir

Nicki Vs. Mariah
Nicki Minaj caught on tape threatening to knock out Mariah Carey. Read More »
Mariah's Kiddos
morocco monroe cannon
Look at how cute her twins are! Read More »
Mariah's Twins!
No, not those twins. Morocco and Monroe is who I'm talking about. Read More »
mariah carey

This post was reprinted with permission from BlackBookMag.com.

The New York Post got its hands on the new memoir by music honcho Tommy Mottola and the paper’s most depressing article today is a long piece detailing all the ways Mottola outlined his abuse of ex-wife and ex-employee, Mariah Carey. Mottola first came into contact with then-18-year-old singer through a mix tape. He might have fallen in love with — and set his sights on making money from — her voice, but he very quickly turned their relationship into a sexually exploitative, controlling and emotionally abusive one. Keep reading »

Girl Talk: I Put Myself On Mute For A Guy — And I’ll Never Do It Again

I like to consider myself a strong and independent woman. I live alone; I take care of myself and never waiver in my beliefs. I’ve managed to convince myself that I’m fearless; I look confrontation in the eye and am without regret in my behavior – even when it isn’t the most flattering or well thought-out way to handle certain situations. I am, admittedly, a hot head.

I do not allow others to define me, put me in a box labeled by how they see me and will scream at the top of my lungs before I’ll ever let someone try to silence me. I am all these things; I have been all these things, and years from now these expectations that I have for myself will still be true. I don’t give a fuck who might be angered or won’t agree along the way. In the words of the great sailor, Popeye, “I am what I am.”

However, there were a few years in there, the dark years, that I was not all these things. When it came to Christoffer, I was a shadow. Keep reading »

I Was In An Emotionally Abusive Relationship

Why is that women stay with their abusers? A little less than two years ago, I certainly couldn’t have told you the answer to that question. Now I can. And that’s because I did.

I’ll never be able to pinpoint the exact moment when my relationship with Chris started to become unhealthy. It could have been as early as the moment I met him. It could have been the first time he criticized my weight. It could have been when he started controlling who I could hang out with. It could have even been the very first time he called me a “stupid slut.” Really, at this point it all becomes a big blur full of screaming, name calling, and suicidal threats, not to mention one very unhealthy pattern of fighting and making up.  Read more

Dear Wendy: Depressed Husband Is Emotionally Abusive

Let me first start off by saying that I love my husband more than anything else on earth. We have been together for 10 years (no kids yet) and we have a very strong connection and bond, but we have one major problem that is starting to weigh on our marriage. My husband is depressed. He has been as long as I have known him due to a very troubled and unhappy childhood. I have grown to look past it, but it is becoming worse than ever and I can no longer ignore it. The thing is, his depression has a very ugly side. He becomes emotionally abusive to me, often calling me names or making me feel worthless. Although I understand that he is projecting the feelings he has for himself onto me, it still hurts and I am having a very difficult time maintaining my own happiness. He has been out of work lately, which is only adding to his depression. He becomes very angst-ridden and restless and starts to feel like the walls are closing in. He says it has nothing to do with me and that I am the best thing in his life. When I told him that something has to give because I can no longer tolerate the way he treats me, he told me that this is who he is and if I don’t like it, I need to ask him to leave and he will. But I don’t want him to leave! I love this man with all I’ve got! There are moments of happiness, but they are usually few and far between and usually only come when we have some money to spend on things other than bills. He is not one to take anti-depressants (his mother became highly addicted to them) and we are financially unable to afford a therapist. How can I maintain my own happiness and help him at the same time? I must reiterate that I love him and I want nothing more than for us to make it through this. — Depressing Love

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