Wow. The entertainmentverse (yes, that’s a word) has sure come up with some pretty terrible ideas today. First, Variety broke the story that Donald Trump is producing a show called “Omarosa’s Ultimate Merger.” On it, everyone’s favorite reality TV villainess will be looking for love with one of 12 dudes who are competing for her affection. Good luck casting those 12 men, Donald. All I’m sayin’ is—if ABC had trouble finding guys who really, truly wanted to date adorable, sweet, funny Gillian, I can hardly see them lining up for Omarosa. Also just in from the bad idea department: People is reporting that Ashlee Simpson will be starring as Roxie Hart, the lead in the musical “Chicago,” on Broadway. Did they not get the memo that Ashlee just got evicted from “Melrose Place” because of her terrible acting? And don’t they remember the “SNL” Lip Sync Incident of 2004? Oh, but it gets worse. Eminem will be starring in a horror flick. That’s 3D! Expect “Shady Talez”—yes, that’s what it’s called, because nothing will make you feel hardcorez like wearing 3D glasses—in theaters soon.

MTV deemed Jay-Z 2009’s Hottest MC in the Game, an annual online list, this week. Others on the list included Lil Wayne, Drake, and Kanye West. True to his form, Jay-Z wasn’t the least bit humble about his new title, but he also borrowed a little from Kanye when he said that Eminem deserved to be on the list because of his high album sales this year. Read Jay’s acceptance speech after the jump.

• Nick Cannon took to his Twitter to address the ongoing feud between wife Mariah Carey and Eminem, who’s trying to sell his new album. Nick tweeted several biblical and philosophical quotes about rising above anger. [PopEater]—So this was his punk way of defending his wife, huh? Well at least he didn’t make a dis record in return.
• Kate Major sat down with “E! News” to discuss her relationship with Jon Gosselin and the future she hopes they’ll make together. [E! Online]—I’ll never understand people who discuss a new romance before their love interest is even divorced.
• Jessica Szohr went on a dinner date with Adam Brody from “The O.C.” at Cafeteria in NYC. [Just Jared]

I understand that some people despise their ex after a breakup. But Evan Rachel Wood better watch her back. In the new issue of Spin, Marilyn Manson gives a vivid account of how he cut himself with razor blades after their breakup. And he has this to say about Evan: “I have fantasies every day about smashing her skull with a sledgehammer.” Just a normal day in the Manson home…or the most despicable quote ever?

Last night’s MTV Movie Awards were pretty good—host Andy Samberg was delightfully random, “Twilight”‘s Kristen Stewart dropped her award and looked vaguely like she was on something, and Robert Pattinson was predictably hot. But by far the best moment was when Bruno (aka Sasha Baron Cohen) flew over the stage to present an award, ass exposed, and landed crotch first in Eminem’s face, in the “69” position. Though this was likely staged, Em’s reaction was priceless.

Ain’t love grand? Even though Pink wrote an entire album about her split from motorcross bad ass Carey Hart, and even dissed him to his face in her “So What” video, the pair is now happily back together and even renewed their vows in Australia this week. Pink is on tour promoting Funhouse, i.e. the breakup record. “It’s funny to sing those songs now,” says Pink. “He’s in the audience, so when I sing ‘He’s a tool,’ now that’s my favorite line. I’m like, ‘Hi honey, that’s you!’” Awkward.

Oh, but Pink isn’t the only rock star to totally diss a former lovah in a song, only to take their ex back. It’s as if money, power, readily available groupies, and an entire world cheering their empowerment on isn’t enough. After the jump, the most egregious examples. 

It’s Tuesday and you know what that means. It’s new record release time! This week, skip right past Lionel’s Richie’s Let’s Go. Trust me, it’ll make you want to never listen to or touch any relics from the ‘80s, your Madonna lace gloves included. Here’s what’s really going on now: Tori Amos confesses, Eminem relapses, Iron & Wine gives us a sip, and Jarvis rocks out with his Cocker out.

Eminem’s “We Made You” video pokes fun at celebrities who have made headlines over the past couple years—Bret Michaels for his skanky love search, Jessica Simpson for her weight (should Em really be throwing stones?), Amy Winehouse for her yellow teeth and general cracked-out appearance, Lindsay Lohan for dating Sam Ronson, and Kim Kardashian for her huge booty. The video even features the star of “Nailin’ Palin,” a Hustler porno spoofing Sarah Palin. Obviously, Eminem has been reading tabloids and watching reality TV during his time off, but it’s all in good fun, or at least Kim Kardashian thinks so. “I think this video is so funny! I am a huge Eminem fan and find it flattering that he would rap about me,” said Kim. “He’s a bit harsh about some other celebrities, but you just have to let it go and have a sense of humor. Personally, I’m honored.” The video is rather hilarious, but the song isn’t that funny, entertaining, or catchy when you don’t listen and watch. It just sounds like the usual Eminem fare updated for 2009. Kudos to Dr. Dre for a banging beat, though.