Oh, Kim. I guess at this point I should probably stop pitying the critically dim lighting in your headspace and start actively rallying against you instead, considering it is just that deer-in-the-paparazzi-flashbulbs lunacy that is to thank for the $40 million sitting in your bank account. Lo, when you go around posing yourself in a mimicking fashion next to classic images of Elizabeth Taylor, there is naught for me to do but shake my head and mime a quick Hail Mary. I mean, what is WITH our effectively useless faux-lebrities likening themselves to entertainment icons? Kimye: Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton for the selfie generation? Certainly not. [Instagram]
It has been eight long months since Lindsay Lohan starred in “Liz & Dick,” as of yet the world’s most glorious made-for-TV-movie about the tumultuous love affair between Richard Burton and Elizabeth Taylor. Note, I said “as of yet.” Not to be outdone by Lifetime, the BBC is airing its own Liz and Dick vehicle, “Burton and Taylor,” starring none other than Helena Bonham Carter as our beloved Liz. Judging by this trailer, here’s what HBC has going for her already: convincing acting ability, a voice that isn’t ravaged by cigarettes, and, um, not being Lindsay Lohan. That’s enough for me. [The Wrap]
What’s this we have here, now? Oh, it’s just the first photo from “Burton and Taylor,” the upcoming BBC America film starring, you guessed it, Helena Bonham Carter as Elizabeth Taylor (with Dominic West as her Richard). So what do we think: Bonham Carter > Lohan as Liz? Anyone? [E! Online]
Did you watch “Liz and Dick”? Then you know that the computer you’re reading this on has more acting chops than Lindsay Lohan. That didn’t stop Danielle Fishel — from “Boy Meets World” and the upcoming sequel (that no one really needed) “Girl Meets World” — from spoofing our favorite arrest magnet for “The Soup.”
So, did everyone watch Lifetime’s sure-to-be-a-classic original movie “Liz & Dick,” starring Lindsay Lohan as Dame Elizabeth Taylor and Grant Bowler as Richard Burton, last night? I did. In fact, I watched it twice, it was that horrifically yet entertainingly bad. Where to begin? Lindsay Lohan’s performance was abominable. It was like she didn’t even try to channel Elizabeth Taylor in the slightest, she just showed up to read some lines in between smoke breaks. She could only maintain Elizabeth’s British accent for half sentences at most, and instead of delivering her lines with Taylor’s trademark bravado, Lohan sounded like she was casually shooting the shit with her weed dealer. Now, the hair and makeup were fabulous, but I could never get past the fact that 26-year-old Lohan was supposed to be playing late-20s/early-30s Liz for most of the film, but that she seemed so much older, thanks to her worn-out raspy voice. Really, the film was unofficially sponsored by Marlboro Reds. Lohan was at her most convincing in the last few moments of the movie, playing ’80s era Liz, which I hope prompts Lifetime to do a sequel called “Liz & Larry,” about Taylor’s relationship with Larry Fortensky.
For the record, the plot could be summed up as follows: Liz and Dick fall in love, Liz and Dick fight, Liz throws a vase at the wall and takes some pills, Liz and Dick make up, Liz and Dick fight again, Liz throws a vase at a wall again, Liz and Dick make up, etc. etc. These scenes are broken up with lovely moments where Liz and Dick talk to the audience from beyonnnnnd the graaaaave — i.e. wearing all black, sitting in director’s chairs and smoking cigs — giving us their “perspective” on what drew them to each other. Spoiler alert: you will not understand a thing about either of these two iconic actors by the end of this film.
For those of you who didn’t get a chance to watch the movie, allow me to review — with clips! — the movie’s best/worst moments. Keep reading »