I don’t know what’s gotten into me lately, but I seem to have developed some kind of strange, vague obsession with Shauna Sand. There is something about a woman who walks around 24/7 in Lucite stripper shoes, who has turned herself into a kind of living Barbie, who may very well have produced her own sex tape (or not!), that captivates me. It’s like watching a zombie that looks like a living doll navigate the world in stilettos. Anyway. Now, Shauna’s gonna sell her stuff on eBay, and the video promo for it boggles. Boggles! I can’t believe I have to wait until Oct. 23 to bid on those rhinestone-and-Lucite heels. [Heyman Hustle]

This morning we trekked through the rain to the Apple store in downtown NYC where we were treated to quite the unusual fashion show. In the spirit of “the democratization of fashion,” instead of hustling past bodyguards and navigating seat assignments there was no insane crowd as usual—even though I had an invite, no one checked and it seemed pretty open to whomever happened to be laptop shopping at 11 a.m. Seating was first come, first served (a practice which if applied to all shows would mean that they would actually start on time and not 30-45 minutes late, just sayin’). Anyway, Miss Kamali herself took the stage dressed in one of her signature jumpsuits and black cat glasses and chatted away with tech guru Omar Wasow about how technology has impacted the fashion business.

Most designers wouldn’t touch eBay with a ten-foot pole because the online auction site routinely makes counterfeit pieces available to the public, but Narciso Rodriguez seems ready to take a chance. He’s in talks to design an eight-piece collection for eBay. The prices will range from $75 to $350, which means we common folk could possibly afford it, but the lower-priced line would also improve eBay’s reputation in the fashion world. Thoughts? [The Cut]

Everyone knows that prescription pills are available to anyone looking for them, if you know how to search online. Not that it’s a legal means—but abusing prescription painkillers isn’t all that lawful to begin with. A year or two ago, we all heard about people buying the no-joke acne medicine, Accutane, online—without a prescription or monthly blood tests to monitor your liver health—and drug abuse took a whole new turn into beauty-land. Now, The Daily Mail is reporting internet pill abuse has hit an all new, um, high, and it’s all in the name of beauty. The fight to be skinnier, prettier and clearer-skinned knows no bounds, apparently. We all know buying anything off the internet or eBay comes with a certain level of danger—you always wonder, is it the real deal? But buying MD Skincare peel pads is way different than purchasing something you actually ingest—right?

Yes, these filthy flip-flops were for sale on eBay and even managed to fetch $7.99. No, we’re not sure who icks us out more: the person who sold the sandals or the one who bought them. Either way, it just feels wrong. But what’s really worse? The fact that these are possibly not the grossest things that have ever been posted for sale on the auction site. Over the years, various vendors have blessed us with questionable retail items such as Justin Timberlake’s unfinished French toast (the bid went up to $3,154), a partially used pack of cigarettes (attracted 33 bids), and a group of 24 small kids (bidding ended at $51.) What’s the worst thing you’ve ever come across on eBay? [BuzzFeed]

Screw eBay, this morning on the “The Today Show” we learned of an auction site way better (and cheaper) than Meg Whitman’s site. Retired Detective Tom Lane came up with a website to sell off all of the stolen goods police stations seize, calling it PropertyRoom.com. Profits are split with the individual precincts that hand over the goods—and all of the merch has been exhaustively advertised for it’s real owner(s) before being put up for grabs. (And don’t worry, if you recognize an item that’s yours on the website, they’ll get it back to you when you prove it’s yours.) Want a mack truck? How about a diamond engagement ring? Or clothes and bags and bikes? [The Today Show]

Yes! I’ve been waiting for this! Botox sounds like something I could totally do myself, and this DIY Botox kit on eBay comes with a map that shows you where to inject.

Just mix the “Botox powder” with the saline solution, and for $95 I can poke needles into my skin in the comfort of my own bathroom without having to schlep all the way to a plastic surgeon’s office to deal with medical professionals and sterilization. Don’t even try to outbid me. [Daily Mail U.K.]

When a breakup goes bad (when don’t they?), it’s natural to feel angry. There are the obvious ways to express that emotion—egging his car, throwing his belongings out a window, changing your locks. Or, you could take a more subtle and modern approach through technology. Sure, the following tactics might not be entirely legal, but they should serve as some inspiration.

1. Change the name of his shared iTunes library. You know how when you’re on a network, you see music libraries that usually read, “Sally Smith’s Library”? With a simple click on “Preferences” you can switch it to something nasty like “My Music Taste Blows” or “I’ve Got A Golf Pencil In My Pants”. This actually happened to someone I know. She didn’t realize it until she and her roommates were all sitting around one night working on their laptops and one of them asked, “Whose iTunes is called ‘Cheating Jerk’?”

The Australian man who said he was going to auction off everything in his life, including a few friends, after a bad breakup opened up bids on eBay yesterday. The reserve price was $500,000, but bidding has gone as high as $2.2 million. This guy will probably make a huge profit on his possessions, and he’s also in a new relationship. Perhaps more people should try this technique when they’re having trouble getting over a breakup and new a new lease on life. [The West Australian]

Previously: Life For Sale

Women can be a little crazy after a breakup—hello, Heather Mills! But men have the ability to go equally nuts. An Australia man is auctioning off his life on eBay—house, car, job, clothes, and friends—because he wants to start over. He says that his ex-wife heard about his idea: “Her last comment was, ‘It seems a bit mental to me.’” The auction starts June 22. [Reuters and A Life 4 Sale]

It took a few years, but manly ingenuity has finally found a worse way to break up with someone than on a post-it note.  Wikipedia creator Jimmy Wales dumped his girlfriend, Fox News commentator Rachel Marsden, through a post on his own website. The recently divorced website mogul took notice of the cute Canadian conservative because her Wikipedia page was splashed with haterade. When Marsden asked for some help editing the site, Wales offered to get her out of one sticky situation and into another via IM.  The best part is, just like the breakup, you can read what they typed with one hand online thanks to his competitors at Google, whose sites’ features allowed her to save their Gchat convos.  When Wales threatened to have her deported after the split, Ms. Marsden, who has a history of harassing ex-boyfriends, decided to retaliate by emailing the IMs around to the press and using eBay to sell the personal items he left behind at her apartment. One of his t-shirts with a big “white stain” is going for over $12,000. Um, why?

Porn star, Presidential candidate, and Celebrity Rehab star Mary Carey is auctioning off her old breast implants on eBay calling them “The best stocking stuffer of all time!” Clearly she’s never seen the Christmas beer coozey our grandma knitted for us in 1995. In any case, this for sale silicone isn’t just for fun and games—a portion of the winning bid (currently at $510) will go to the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation. Now those are some plastic titties we’d pay for! [eBay]