Not that he’s doing anything right, but a few hours after Chris Brown was sentenced for assaulting Rihanna, he celebrated by heading to a Los Angeles club where he jumped up on a booth and did an impromptu performance of Michael Jackson’s “Dirty Diana.” One club goer said, “He not only sang, but danced his ass off. He didn’t seem to care at all that everyone was watching him. He was in a totally good mood, just hanging out with his buddies.” [Contact Music]
Well, of course he was in a good mood—he got out of this mess with no jail time, just 1,400 hours of community service and domestic violence classes. We think it was kinda tacky to make a scene after getting off easy for committing a heinous crime, but plenty of stars have found other ways to act inappropriately after escaping the clutches of the law. Keep reading »
A friend of mine, Daniel, said, recently, a group of men and women in his neighborhood bar for a parade approached him “looking for some kind of fight.” A woman in the group, he said, “started some shit with me” and “at one point said, ‘What would you do if I threw this drink on you?’” Daniel said he ignored the woman’s threat and directed his attention to the men in the group; after verbal exchanges, the whole group “slinked away” out of the bar. He said the confrontation made him think about what he would have done if the woman had thrown her drink at him. He wrote to me in an email:
“But I really did consider—would I hit her? And I decided, yeah, I might have. And she would’ve deserved it. Totally unprovoked physical aggression can rightly be met in kind. I probably would’ve slapped her, or I might grabbed her by the shoulders and thrown her aside. Either way, she would’ve deserved some kind of physical reaction.”
Michael, an ex-colleague of mine, has been on the receiving end of physical violence from an ex-girlfriend.
“The only time it’s ok to get any kind of physical with a girl, in my mind is when she’s under the influence of something and hitting/kicking violently (at you or someone else),” he wrote. “Only then do I see it appropriate to physically restrain her…but this is the same rule I use for guys too, so it has little to do with the sex of the individuals involved.”
Sigh. The Feb. 8th incident when Chris Brown assaulted Rihanna was not the first violent argument between the couple. Before his sentencing yesterday, Brown’s probation officer filed a report revealing the couple was involved in two other incidents “related to domestic violence“—and come to find out, Rihanna has slapped Brown in the past. Obviously that does not make the intensity of his brutal Feb. 8 assault excusable, but it sheds light on how they had a more violent relationship than we previously thought. Keep reading »
The graph, released by UNICEF and based on data collected between 2001 and 2007, displays the percentages of women, by country, who believe it is OK for their husbands to hit them. The numbers are all horrifying, ranging from 6.9 percent in Serbia to a heartbreaking 90 percent in Jordan. More info here. [via Feministing] Keep reading »
“Why does she stay?” is the question most often asked when we hear about someone involved in an abusive relationship. Unfortunately, it’s also one of the least helpful things you can say to a woman caught up in this cycle. So what can we do to help when we suspect a friend is being battered?
Several years ago, project manager Jenny found herself in that position when she noticed a new friend was covered in bruises. “I told her flat-out that I had seen the bruises and that I was concerned,” Jenny says via email. “I told her that I didn’t know if she needed help or someone to talk to, but that she could call me any time, day or night.” Keep reading »
In London’s West End, a 30-year-old man threw his girlfriend through the window of a Banana Republic store. Instead of killing her, a shard of glass snapped out and stabbed him, killing him. His girlfriend sustained cuts and is expected to make a full recovery. Karma’s a bitch, isn’t it? [Daily Mail]
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During grad school, I worked part-time in a gift shop for extra money. I’ll never forget the day glamorous, model-esque bookkeeper Lucy came into work wearing dark Chanel sunglasses. I could tell something wasn’t right. “What’s going on?” I asked. Lucy lifted her sunglasses to reveal two black eyes. Thus began my crusade to help Lucy get out of her abusive relationship, which resulted in me picking up her and her suitcases on a dark corner at night, her boyfriend threatening to “beat the crap” out of me, and Lucy heading straight back to him eventually. This was my first but sadly not my last time seeing the destructive domestic violence cycle. It left me feeling angry and helpless, wishing there was something more I could do. Keep reading »
Boyfriend of the Year Chris Brown is getting his slap on the wrist in a L.A. courtroom today and then appearing on “Larry King Live” (reportedly after Oprah’s camp said “No way, Jose” to his sorry ass). Brown’s schedule is so free, you see, because he isn’t doing any jail time for beating the crap out of his girlfriend. Keep reading »
Last week our own Judy McGuire shared her story of being in an abusive relationship. This week, she emailed me to let me know that Safe Horizons, a NYC-based domestic violence program, is currently in competition for a $100,000 grant. She and I would like to encourage you to vote for them by heading to ClickToEmpower.com and clicking on “Safe Horizons.” There are other wonderful organizations competing against them, so vote for whoever you’d like, but Safe Horizons is our favorite.
In other domestic violence advocacy news, that couple whose wedding procession video became hot s**t on YouTube last week are now using their global fame to raise money to combat domestic violence, in part because the music playing in the video is by Chris Brown, who beat up his girlfriend Rihanna earlier this year. Jill Peterson and Kevin Heinz explain on their new website that they want to direct all the viral attention towards a worthy cause. “Due to the circumstances surrounding the song in our wedding video we have chosen the Sheila Wellstone Institute. Sheila Wellstone was an advocate, organizer, and national champion in the effort to end domestic violence in our communities.” It’s awesome to see two people using their sudden fame for good, isn’t it? [Star Tribune] Keep reading »