My boyfriend (he would be a fiancé, but I turned him down) and I have been in a relationship for 2 1/2 years, and we have a 16-month-old daughter together. We’ve had problems in our relationship from almost the beginning. Every time I try to move on, he always coaxes me into staying (saying “we’re a family,” he loves me, “we’ll work on our relationship,” etc.). Most of our issues stem from his drinking. He’s English, and so he’s always spent loads of time in the pub, however, he’s being irresponsible, and only recently have I figured out he’s a functioning alcoholic. He says he’ll come home sober, but he keeps choosing not to (he can’t say no to another pint). Recently our arguments have started getting worse, and it’s getting physical. He refuses to go to couple’s counseling, and I’ve never been more alone in my life than I am in this relationship with him! I think on some level I do love him, but I feel that our daughter is more important. I don’t want her to grow up thinking that our nuclear family unit is normal. Should I MOA or try and stick it out, and focus just on my daughter and myself (only including him when he’s not drinking)? — Girlfriend of a Drunk
Tag Archives: domestic violence
Boyfriend of the
year decade Chris Brown fails at life again. Yesterday Prince Charming lashed out against the rapper Raz-B on Twitter, tweeting homophobic slurs and making comments about rape and molestation. All of Chris Brown’s nastiest tweets appear to have been deleted with only the ones where he denies being a homophobe remaining.
It’s a piping hot mess, so bear with me … Keep reading »
Here’s one year-end list we’d never want to be on. The Boston Public Health Commission ranked the top 10 worst relationship songs released this year; songs were ranked by the unhealthy messages they sent listeners about relationships and violence against women. At the top of the list? Usher, whose tracks “Lil Freak” and “Hot Tottie” occupied the number one and two spots.
Songs are scored based on their portrayal of relationships, sex, manipulation and disrespect. Songs are ranked by a panel of 100 teens, who, said director Casey Corcoran, “see which ones endorse a healthy or unhealthy relationships.”
Songs were NOT scored based on the reputation of the artists themselves (which is why Usher tops the list and not Chris Brown). Check out the rest of the list after the jump. Keep reading »
Former actor Darius McCrary, who played Eddie Winslow on “Family Matters,” was recently served with a restraining order. The legal action was the result of abuse accusations by his ex-wife Karrine Steffans. Steffans claims that McCrary beat her with a belt in front of her son and that this was not the first time he has harmed her. Currently, Darius is not allowed within a 100-feet of his wife, and she is looking to make the restraining order permanent with upcoming court appearances. [Huffington Post]
Unfortunately, this is not the first time a former actor has been accused of abuse later in life. Read on to see what past stars are sadly spending more time in court than on the screen. Keep reading »
I started a long-distance (1,500 miles apart) relationship with a wonderful man in August of last year. Things were going great, but suddenly took a turn for the worse in January when he was diagnosed with cancer. I was able to take two semesters off from school to go be his caregiver. We continued to build our relationship and he constantly expressed his gratitude for my being there. Unfortunately, about a month into his treatment, he started to become verbally abusive, and began to pick fights. Months went by, and threats of hitting me turned into actually hitting me, on two occasions. I reached out to his family and friends for support, but he told them I was a crazy liar. I begged him to see a therapist, or to talk to his doctor about the medications and steroids he was on, but he refused. When he was done his last round of chemo and in remission, I ended the relationship, packed my bags and went home. We have stayed in contact, and he surprised me last weekend by driving out to visit me. He spent a few days at my apartment, and was once again the man I fell in love with. He told me that he’d told his family about the abuse, that he loved me, and that he wants to get back together. My friends think I should cut all contact with him, and that he lost his chance to be with me once he hit me. I think his behavior was caused by the drugs and steroids he was on, so my decision isn’t easy. Is it really as cut-and-dry as my friends think, or can I give him a second chance? — Abused Caregiver
Mel Gibson just got ickier, if that’s possible. In a court document defending himself from his ex-girlfriend Oksana Grigorieva‘s claim that he beat her while she was holding their baby daughter, Lucia, Mel also addressed the infamous phone calls she recorded where he hurls abuse at her. Really, you see, Mel’s outrage was Oksana’s fault. He states in the court filing, “I felt that Oksana repeatedly attempted to push my emotional ‘buttons’ to provoke me during the calls; of course, I had no idea at the time that she was taping them.” Oh, so if Mel had known he was being taped when she was “provoking” him, he might not have said “You look like a f**king pig in heat and if you get raped by a pack of n**gers it will be your fault,” or threatened to kill her and bury her in the rose garden? Got it. While I have no doubt that Oksana manipulated Mel into making these embarrassing racist, misogynist statements on tape, the dude just refuses take responsibility for himself like a grownup. Maybe after the beaver movie, his next role should be as a domestic abuser. He’s got it down pat. [Radar Online] Keep reading »
It’s hard to forget the episode of “Teen Mom” where Amber Portwood kicks out her baby daddy, Gary Shirley, for taking their daughter and threatening to call child services. As he leaves, they get into a big fight. During the scene, Amber gets in his face cursing. She hits him repeatedly, and calls him things like a “fat piece of s**t.” As he retreats down the stairs, she kicks him. The scene was shocking when it aired. And now the police are reviewing the unedited footage. Keep reading »
I know October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. But the 10th month of the year is another time for reflection on an issue that doesn’t get quite the attention it deserves: Domestic Violence Awareness Month. The Frisky has been re-posting some of our past content by our contributor Judy McGuire, a domestic abuse survivor, but we were pleased to see it’s being addressed on a national level, as well.