Disney World is the happiest place on Earth, at least according to Disney’s copyright lawyers. That description may fit pretty well for kids and a few adults, but working here is a different matter altogether. Don’t get me wrong; it’s still a Magic Kingdom. But Disney’s “magic” is a multifaceted thing, just as liable to make some dude barf on the teacup ride as it is to create precious childhood memories. Find out what you never knew about what goes on inside on Cracked…
In a New York Post expose that made my stomach turn, I learned that rich, Manhattan mothers have discovered the most despicable way imaginable to bypass long lines at Disney World: hiring disabled people to pose as family members so their precious children don’t have to wait in line.
According to the rules of the theme park, patrons with a wheelchair or motorized scooter can bring up to six guests to a “more convenient entrance.” The only other way to get preferential treatment at Disney World is to purchase a VIP Tour Package for $300-plus an hour, which includes a personal guide and fast passes. But even with the package, the park warns patrons that there “may be a waiting period before boarding.” In comparison, these “black-market Disney guides,” as they’re being called, cost about $130 an hour and are allegedly more efficient when it comes to cutting the line. Keep reading »
Last semester I worked at Walt Disney World and encountered thousands of “guests” (as they are known in Disney-speak) a day. They came to Walt Disney World from all over the actual world, although they tended to be predominantly from
the Western Hemisphere North America, Europe, or Brazil, and were all ages, races, and attitudes. Even with all that diversity, patterns of people began to emerge. There is no better incubator for studying human behavior then shoving thousands of people into one surprisingly tiny space and making them wait for roller coasters, apparently.
And I’m not talking “people from Louisiana all have the same accent” patterns. I mean real, big, regardless-of-the-language barriers I often encountered patterns. Here was what I noticed about humans during my six months as a cast member … Keep reading »
Lady Gaga visited Disney World this weekend (did she, ahem, drive herself?) and took the opportunity to pose alongside the Evil Queen from “Snow White.” Do you suppose she chose to pose with the Evil Queen because she relates to her the most out of all the Disney characters? Or maybe she just really wanted an apple and saw her chance to score a free one. Keep reading »
A good rule of thumb: never trust a man without pants. On a trip to Epcot Center in 2008, 27-year-old April Magolon stopped to get Donald Duck’s autograph. And after obliging, Donald allegedly grabbed her breast and molested her. April is now suing Disney for $50,000 for negligence, battery, and infliction of emotional distress. Keep reading »
In June, 60-year-old grandpa John Moyer visited Walt Disney World. He was hanging in Toontown when he ran into Minnie Mouse. As he took a photo with her, he reached up and gave her fake-mouse boobs a little squeeze. Just for good measure, he patted her on the butt. The grandkids were watching. The woman playing Minnie complained to her boss, who had Moyer arrested, according to Click Orlando. This week, he went on trial and was just sentenced to two days in jail, 180 days probation, and 50 hours of community service — all of which he must do before he can head home to Pennsylvania.
The best part of this whole story? The courtroom exchanges. Keep reading »
A husband and wife were tidying up their villa at Disney World in Orlando, and the husband accidentally threw away his wife’s engagement, wedding, and five-year-anniversary rings. Oops. But those devoted Disney employees donned protecteive clothing, searched through trash, and found the rings! “That’s not the first time we’ve gone through trash â€” oh, no,” said Drew Weaver, the executive housekeeper at Disney’s Wilderness Lodge. “We don’t always find things. Many times we come up empty. But we didn’t this time.” [AP] Keep reading »