Job hunters, here’s one way to guarantee you will not find employment: attach a dick pic with your resume. We know this because, well, common sense, and a man in Dallas went ahead and tested this method out. His, um, credentials did not land him a job offer, but did earn him a class C misdemeanor for “obscene display or distribution” of his penis. Keep reading »
Tumblr is like the Target of the internet. While surfing for Miley Cyrus tongue GIFs, aggregating animated porn and watching cute animal videos, you can stop off and get your penis assessed by an anonymous Tumblerbot. Critique My Dick Pic is a Tumblr with a simple premise: Send your dick pics and get them reviewed “with love” (by a woman, I presume, although I could be wrong). There’s no size or appearance shaming. Just a “ruthlessly honest,” 100 percent anonymous report on the “angles, lighting and general tone” of your, most likely, “artless and dull” penis photograph. Let’s face it, this is a service the male population is in desperate need of. It’s not that dick pics are unsavory per se, it’s just that men seem to have no idea about how to take a flattering one. We thank you, penis critic, whoever you are. [Critique My Dick Pic]
For those of you who do not live in or near New York City, here is something you need to know: Bushwick, Brooklyn is the most annoying, pretentious, gentrified neighborhood in the whole world, filled with the most annoying, pretentious gentrifiers in the whole world. I moved there once and hastily moved out less than two months later. It’s that annoying. It’s like “Girls” in real life. So OF COURSE a Bushwick art gallery is doing a show about dick pics. Four women have collected 300 dick pics, including ones they themselves received, and framed the images for your gag-reflex-inducing cultural edification.
Please, ladies! Georgia O’Keefef you are not. Let’s not even touch upon how these images are being used without the dick-owner’s consent —which is all kinds of unethical — according to the New York Observer. I can think of an endless number of photography-based art shows that I would rather see than a collection of strange men’s dick pics, such as: Keep reading »
For a long time, eyebrow-arching and pearl-clutching over “hookup culture” has focused on young women: they will feel used by young men and come to believe they can only derive value in themselves from their sexuality. Such concerns have been roundly and fairly criticizing as portraying young women as victims lacking in agency, or worse, in need of a paternalistic watchful eye.
There has been less of a focus on how hookup culture affects young men. According to a piece by the usually-spot-on journalist Abigail Pesta, writing for NBCnews.com, there is “an increasing confusion among boys about how to behave” and experts say “boys who engage in this kind of sexualized behavior say they have no intention to be hostile or demeaning — precisely the opposite. While they admit they are pushing limits, they also think they are simply courting.”
Oh dear. Keep reading »
Dear I’m Too Kind To Use Your Real Name,
I am writing this letter because I’m hoping I can prevent you from ever sending another unsolicited picture of your naked penis to another human being again for the rest of your life. When I clicked on an email in my inbox with the subject line “need some advice,” I wasn’t expecting to see FOUR pictures of a stranger’s penis. I get a fair number of emails from readers and sometimes they want advice (not that I’m qualified to give any), and so I had no reason to believe that your email would be so wildly inappropriate.
In your email, you asked me for advice about products to make your penis larger. You complained that it’s “quite short” and “very skinny” and that when it gets erect it only gets slightly bigger and not much thicker. And then, anonymous dick pic sender, you gave me measurements. Measurements! I mean, really?
After I picked my jaw up off the floor — I didn’t want my face to remain in Exasperated Snarl Expression for the rest of my life — my attention was drawn to perhaps the most puzzling line in your email: ” I was going to send you pictures of when I have an erection but it is quite embarrassing,” you wrote. Keep reading »