Tag Archives: dear wendy

Dear Wendy: “My Husband Won’t Stop Bragging About His Package”

It’s time again for “Shortcuts.” For every question, I’ll give my advice in two sentences or less, because sometimes the answer to a person’s question is so obvious and the need to hear it so great, being as clear and frank as possible is simply the best way to go. Today we discuss braggart husbands, commitment-phobe boyfriends, “test-driving” relationships, and what to do with a cigar box of memories. Keep reading »

Dear Wendy Updates: “Cheated On” Responds

It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing today. After the jump, we hear from Cheated On, who wrote in a couple weeks ago when she discovered her long-distance boyfriend had cheated on her during a big fight they were in. After talking it over with him, she was considering working through their issues but was nervous about whether they could re-build trust and actually get past the cheating. “He said that he would do anything I asked of him if it meant that we could keep our relationship going. My gut tells me that he might actually be honest, but [...] I told myself I would never forgive someone who cheated on me.” So did she forgive her boyfriend? Did she tell him what she needed from him to get the relationship back on track? Or did she decide to forgo reconciliation? Find out after the jump. Keep reading »

Dear Wendy: “My Boyfriend Compares Me To His Dead Ex”

I’m 22 and recently started my first real relationship. We’ve only been dating for about two months and he already talks about, mentions in conversation, and sometimes even compares me to his deceased ex (whom I knew very casually as we were from the same small town and went to the same school). It’s been about four years since she passed away, and they were an “on and off” couple at the time. I was fine and actually thankful for his honesty about the situation in the beginning, but I got a little weirded out when he started comparing me to her — especially when I kissed him. He said it was odd that I sometimes kissed with my eyes open, like she used to do (and he even asked me to stop doing that). I tried to confront him a little about it, basically by saying I am not her at all, and any comparisons should be kept to himself, but I don’t want to hurt him or create more problems than it’s worth with this. I noticed that this also tends to make him seem a little clingy and sometimes emotional, but I have little to compare to. Any advice would be greatly appreciated! — Not a Replacement

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Dear Wendy Updates: Shallow Sally Responds

It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing today. After the jump, we hear from Shallow Sally, a woman who worried her boyfriend wouldn’t be getting her anything for Christmas because he promised her a cruise for the Christmas before but broke up with her before ponying up. They got back together a few weeks later and she wanted to know how she could make sure she “didn’t get screwed again.” She even saved the receipts for the “two nice gifts” she got him in case he “pulled the same crap” he did the year before. I, and quite a few of the commenters, had some choice words for her, and now she’s ready to give us a piece of her mind. After the jump, read her update and find out if she’s still with her guy. Keep reading »

Dear Wendy: “My Boyfriend Fantasizes About His Ex”

Recently, I opened up my boyfriend’s computer with no intentions of snooping, and his recent Google searches came up. He had been Googling a woman he worked with in the past. I never knew whether they had a relationship prior to ours (we’ve been together for almost two years), but I knew they had “something” going on. After I discovered he had been basically Googling her model pictures, I got very curious, and looked at his history, and saw that after Googling numerous pictures of her, he watched quite a few pornos. So it’s obvious he had been “doing his thang” to this girl’s pictures. I approached him about it, and of course he flipped out on me for snooping on his computer. He then finally confessed “we had amazing sex and she turned me on.” WOW. I couldn’t believe it! Let me also say I don’t know any of his past partners, and I like it that way. I am an extremely jealous woman, and this has just put me over the edge. My insecurities are at their highest now with him, and I feel like I can’t be good enough for him sexually. Why can’t he “do this thang” to MY pictures? I understand men are visual, and that’s just how they are. But it weirds me out that it’s someone actually from his past. It’s driving me crazy!! HELP!!! — Jealous Snooper

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Dear Wendy: “My Boyfriend Isn’t Physically Attracted To Me”

I met a guy on the internet a little over a year ago. We clicked right away, and discovered we’re both mid-30s and share the same philosophies, thoughts and beliefs. A lot of our likes and dislikes mingle quite nicely, too. Of course, it’s a long-distance thing, but we’ve had a couple visits, both in his town and in mine. We’ve had fun in bed — the sex isn’t amazing, but it shows distinct promise. Bottom line: I want to make a life with this man; I can’t imagine connecting with someone else on the same level ever again. But, the problem is he isn’t physically attracted to me. I think I’ve always known it, but I pushed it to the back of my mind. The only time the word “hot” has been mentioned is when I’m performing particular sex acts on (or for) him. And even then, it wasn’t “you’re hot”, but “that’s hot.” Silly, I know, but it makes a difference… And now it’s out in the open, and I feel utterly broken up by it. He’s insisting that he loves me with his “fully-advanced” brain, and that what the “reptilian brain” thinks isn’t important. But it is! If he doesn’t find me attractive, then he doesn’t love me completely. Is it possible to make a life with someone when their heart doesn’t skip a beat upon seeing you? — Not Hot to Him

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