Here’s something you probably wouldn’t guess about me: my friends and family members haven’t met anyone I’ve dated for almost eight years. Wait. I stand corrected. One time I invited my brother to dinner with a guy I was dating about four years ago and I chewed all my fingernails off before the appetizer course.
It’s almost pathological, my phobia of introducing guys I’m dating to my loved ones. In the past I’d always made excuses like, “If he’s important to me, you’ll meet him” or “I’m still getting to know him myself.” I rationalized the compartmentalization of my love life by telling myself that I needed to get to know someone without everyone else’s opinions tainting how I felt about the guy. I’ve been lying to myself. Keep reading »
In case my last name doesn’t make it obvious enough, I’m Asian. At the same time, as some of my friends have noticed, my last few girlfriends have all been decidedly not Asian.
To their mock-raised eyebrows, my response is, “I’m sorry. It’s not my fault.”
Okay, okay, I know what they’re thinking: As an Asian, I’m supposed to like “my own kind,” right?
Sure. And eat rice … and love math … and know just how much starch to add to your laundry … and all those other uncomfortable, racial stereotypes we’re not supposed to talk about.
Not surprisingly, I’ve often been slapped with the “Twinkie” label. In case you aren’t hip on your semi-offensive urban speak, a Twinkie is an Asian who acts white—that is, yellow on the outside, but white on the inside.
But, here’s a secret: My preference for dating non-Asian women wasn’t a conscious choice. Keep reading »
My dog Kerbey is a quasi-Internet celebrity. With his cartoonish tiny legs, large torso, giant bat ears and confused eyes, any picture I put up of him on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram is guaranteed to get mountains of likes, retweets or exclamations of, “OMG you have the best dog EVERRRRR.” If Kerbey just lived his life through the Internet, that “best dog ever” title would be an easy win. Unfortunately, like a high-angled MySpace photo, Kerbey’s online persona is not exactly entirely accurate. For you see, Kerbey can be a major dick. Keep reading »
Last year, we did a “Best And Worst Careers For Love” survey which highlighted, among other things, that the five worst careers when it comes to finding love are: journalism (ha), business ownership, healthcare, real estate and law. This isn’t terribly surprising given the long hours of these careers, and how long it takes to ascend to the top in all of them.
But according to a new survey from eHarmony, maybe if these work addicts went for the opposite type of profession when it came to scoping out a potential love interest, they’d be happier. In honor of Labor Day, the online dating site looked at communication trends between their users to find out how they were influenced by people’s careers. It turns out that what you do for a living has a big influence on who you hit up online in your off-hours. Here are just a few of the tidbits they found:
1. Female business executives have the highest rate of communication with men who are barbers or hair stylists. Wait … really? I don’t see those two professions dating in real life too much. Maybe the businesswomen need hairstyle advice? Read more…
I met Cute Train Guy en route back to New York just after Thanksgiving. (I’m nothing if not completely uncreative with my nicknames.) With the annual tradition of overcrowding and delays, Thanksgiving travel gives me major agita. So, that evening I was relieved to secure a window seat on the Amtrak train and beyond pleased when a cute guy sat down next to me. He was nerdy hot, with glasses and a quick wit. We hit it off and chatted the entire ride. The chemistry was great, but I kept kicking myself that I had left the house in such scrubby clothes and without a lick of makeup. “I’m normally much cuter than this,” I wanted to tell him, but I couldn’t because I was too busy blowing my nose and sneezing for two hours straight. I had been battling a wicked cold throughout the weekend and on my lap was a pile of tissues and throat lozenges, neither of which are an aphrodisiac, unfortunately.
But as the train pulled into Penn Station, he asked for my business card.
Ohh! I thought, Perhaps he’ll call and we can go out once I’m feeling better. Then I can make a better impression! Keep reading »
Breaking up is, for lack of a better word, hard. But it doesn’t have to be. At least it doesn’t have to be nearly as hard as some people make it with the questionable wardrobe choices, mopey Facebook status updates and drunk dialing adventures. I don’t personally think celebrities should be considered role models, but I must admit they know how to break up in style; I mean seriously when was the last time you aired your dirty laundry and people looked on in awe? I bet the answer to that is a big fat never because no matter how cute your skivvies are, when they’re clean covered in the skid marks of heart break (and possibly shots of Hennessy) they’re less then appealing. Anyway, here are six steps to handling a breakup like a celebrity, which I’m sure has to be way better then attempting to bury yourself under a mountain of Cheeto dust. Keep reading »
Today is Thursday. That means nothing to you. But to me, it means I woke up smiling because every Thursday, I walk 13 blocks to visit my current crush. He works in the mobile falafel food truck which parks in my neighborhood once a week. In Hinduism, there’s a devotional act called Puja (and pardon me if I am getting this wrong, I learned about it in college so it’s been a while) where one shows reverence to the divine by lavishing worship on a object or representation of a deity. I’m not a religious girl, but I conduct my crushes with an air of spiritual devotion. I seek out men who edify some need in me. It’s not about physical beauty, although sometimes that’s involved. It’s not like I actually want to date them. A crush, for me, is not about sex or love. It’s about basking in the glory of the best masculinity has to offer. It’s about having a reason to walk 13 blocks in the rain to get a falafel, and feeling uplifted for having done so. After the jump, I pay homage to my biggest crushes of all time. Keep reading »
Like Brigham’s Ice Cream, Dunkin’ Donuts, and Neco Wafers, I hail from Boston. I am a proud native of Kickassachusetts and I will defend my hometown as though it’s my somewhat slutty younger sister–I can see her issues, but I will have her back to the death.
Right after college, I moved to Chicago and lived there for 10 months. Around month six or seven, I decided that Illinois simply wasn’t for me—I don’t think that the Earth revolves around Big 10 football, I hate Bratwurst, and I can’t stomach mispronouncing “Versailles” as “Ver-Sales” on purpose. I needed to get back to the right coast. After I decided that I was going to move back to Boston, I had to stick it out in Chicago for a few more months to get through my apartment lease and receive a long-awaited and much-needed bonus from my nightmare paralegal job. Keep reading »
After a four year hiatus from online dating, for a number of reasons, I was ready to give it a shot again. The most important being: I think you get out of things what you put into them, and my love life … well, let’s just say my effort level has been minimal at best. The last online date I went on –four years ago — ended with me running. Literally. I had to run from the restaurant after the guy told me he was under federal investigation and thought that it was a woman’s job to change diapers. So you can imagine how anxious I was to venture into the virtual dating world again.
I was beyond relieved when I saw T* sitting there at the wine bar, looking better than he did in his online profile. I exhaled as I took in his nerdy glasses, his nice smile. I was excited when I found out that we actually had stuff to talk about –our similar career paths, our love of The Smiths. I was thrilled when we made plans to go on a bike ride for our second date. I had recently gotten a bicycle and was looking forward to riding it.
This was going better than I ever could have hoped. Online dating … onward ho! Keep reading »