Tag Archives: dating donts

Family Affairs: How Not To Handle The Holiday Meet & Greet

There comes a time in every free-wheeling, fun-having relationship where a lady has to suck it up, buckle down and meet the people who spawned her beloved. Nine times out of ten, this happens around the holidays, and there is almost always a festive meal involved. The most wonderful time of the year? Yeah, right.

The first thing you need to do is get the skinny from your man. What are his parents like? Are they churchgoers? Recovering hippies? Military? You need to know what you’re up against. Though each set of parents is different (and once you throw in stepparents, you could be dealing with a couple sets), there are some universal things you should definitely not do if you want to make a good impression. Here are a few examples: Keep reading »

Dating Don’ts: What Not To Do When You Meet Your Ex’s New Girlfriend

Unless one of you moved to the other side of the planet (or died), chances are, you will, at some point in time, cross paths with someone who broke your heart. Then, as if seeing him in the flesh weren’t unpleasant enough, there’s always a chance that he won’t be alone.

But maybe you were the heartbreaker. In that case, running into him won’t be so torturous. Or perhaps you guys had one of those mythical “mutual” breakups that I’ve heard so much about but have never once witnessed in real life. Again, no biggie, right?

Well, sure. Theoretically anyway. But even after the most amicable breakup, it’s still jarring to see someone you loved with someone new. You can tell yourself you’re happy for him, but seeing them together for the first time can still feel awkward at best, excruciating at worst. Keep reading »

Dating Don’ts: How NOT To Mesh Your Friends With His

You’ve met his friends; he’s met yours. Now it’s time to add fruity cocktails and mix. Short of introducing your parents to his, combining your two sets of friends—especially if they exist in very different worlds—is one of the most nerve-wracking milestones in a relationship. And since summertime is party time, it’s probably going to happen in the next month or so. Here are a few steps you can take to make sure it’s not a complete disaster. Keep reading »

How Not To Date Like Carrie Bradshaw

Carrie Bradshaw is not only a Manhattan and fashion icon, but as a dating columnist, she’s considered a dating icon as well. Why? She’s selfish, immature, manipulative, impulsive, and, let’s face it, kind of psycho. She gives women, even kooky women, a bad name. Ladies, feel free to emulate Carrie’s style and visit her favorite NYC haunts, but when it comes to dating, it’s best to do anything but what she does. Carrie makes several common mistakes throughout the “Sex and the City” series and by watching her missteps, women can learn a lot about what to do and, more importantly, what not to do, at all stages of a relationship. Keep reading »

Dating Don’ts: How NOT To Pick Up A Guy At A Bar

As a wise man once told me, there’s not much a woman can do to make herself completely unappealing to every guy at a bar. After all, a bar contains all the essential elements to romance—booze, dim lighting, and the sweet, sweet smell of desperation.

However, as difficult as it is to come off as completely repellent—especially as last call approaches — there are some behaviors to steer away from. So whatever you do … Keep reading »

15 First Date Mistakes To Avoid

The other day the Telegraph published a list of ten first date faux pas, which included bad manners, being late, and answering phone calls (isn’t this the same as “bad manners”?). Um, thanks Telegraph! We never would have figured those out on our own! Now, how about some tips that may not be complete no-brainers, huh? After the jump, 15 more first date mistakes to avoid. Keep reading »

Dating Don’ts: Valuable Lessons Gleaned from Reality TV

reality tv photo

Let’s face it, the best thing about reality TV is its ability to make ourselves feel better about our own lives. Bumming ‘bout your bubble butt—hey, at least you’re not as large as the peeps on “The Biggest Loser.” Angry your boyfriend cheated? Jerry Springer will make you grateful he was banging some coworker, and not knocking up your mom.

Oddly enough, most of these shows seem to be trying to deliver a message or lesson. The problem is that there’s a huge discrepancy between What They Want You to Learn (WTWYTL) and the Actual Lessons Learned (ALL). Luckily, I’m here to translate.
Keep reading »

Dating Don’ts: Who Gets What In A Breakup?

At a long-ago birthday party, my cartoonist friend Peter gave me a framed piece of his artwork. As he handed it over, he said, “This is for you, so no matter what happens with him, it’s yours.” At the time I thought it was weird. After all, my boyfriend and I were never ever going to break up.

When my boyfriend dumped me a few months later, Peter’s painting was the first thing I packed.

Though The New York Post recently ran a story about couples signing “pre-prenups” before marriage is even on the table, most cohabiting, or even co-existing, couples don’t bother. I mean, if it’s legalities you want, either get married or go down to City Hall and register as domestic partners.

And besides, without kids or shared property, what’s the law going to do for you? Gifts are one thing, but what of the random detritus that gets left behind? Is Johnny Law really going to help you get your Ramones shirt back? Probably not. So most couples figure this stuff out themselves. Keep reading »

Dating Don’ts: How To Travel As A Couple Without Killing Each Other

Second only to his inexplicable ardor for overhead lighting, my boyfriend Spyro’s extreme loathing for travel is probably our number-one topic of, uh, discussion.

I love to travel and I’m not picky—I’ll go pretty much anywhere my credit cards can afford to take me. Once I decide where I’m going, I carefully research the best deals, amp up my excitement with guidebooks and daily internet searches, and so by the day I split town, I’m in a happy tizzy. I carefully pack the night before and make sure I’m at the airport two hours ahead of time so I can get in a quick pre-boarding glass of wine and maybe a little duty-free shopping. Keep reading »

Dating Don’ts: Fight Or Flight?

The first time someone tried to rob me, it was four in the morning. I was in a desolate part of town, I was tipsy, and it was my birthday. A guy came up from behind my sister and me and tried to grab her purse. Without even thinking, I grabbed it back and screamed, “I’M GOING TO KILL YOU!”

Expecting an easy grab-and-go, the guy freaked out, turned and ran. I took off after him, intent on beating the crap out of him. At precisely the same moment, we both realized he was twice my size. He turned towards me and I high-tailed it back down the street, shrieking like the scaredy cat I am.

Now if I had to advise someone what to do if a big guy tries to rob them, threatening death and chasing him would not even be in my top five suggestions. But my beer-addled nervous system threw my body first into fight, and then into flight. (Thank God!)

There comes a time in just about every relationship where you get so angry at the other person, you’re not sure whether you should stay and duke it out (figuratively, of course), or throw in the towel and cut your losses. Keep reading »

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