Tag Archives: dating donts

Dating Don’ts: Is It A Booty Call Or Nah?

Dating Don'ts: Is It A Booty Call Or Nah?
Booty Call Etiquette
woman waking up
You should not wake your roommate up if you're having a booty call. Read More »

We’ve all been there. Someone you were hot and heavy with will suddenly disappear, as if wiped from this earth, only to reappear in the form of a typo-laden text message one night while you’re doing a face mask in your sweatpants. Like that mosquito that you try endlessly to kill before going to sleep, this text irks you. Maybe you were bummed about the way things ended, and you’re considering entertaining this missive. Maybe you hate this person forever, but didn’t mind having sex with them and could be persuaded to do it again. Communication these days is so very tricky, but never fear, I am here for you. In this day and age, it can be difficult to figure out what precisely constitutes a booty call, and how exactly you should respond to it. Whatever your situation may be, you’re facing the age old question — is it a booty call or nah? Here are some situations you might find yourself in, along my expert assessment so that you might tackle these situations head on. Keep reading »

Dating Don’ts: 5 Real Life Dating Lessons From “Kim Kardashian: Hollywood”

Dating Don'ts: 5 Real Life Dating Lessons From "Kim Kardashian: Hollywood"
Kim Kardashian's Hollywood
The struggle is so real in this iPhone game. Read More »

Kim Kardashian: Hollywood is a game in which a normal human being dresses themselves in a variety of hilariously tarted up clothes, changes their hair a lot and pursues fame with the same relentless zeal of The Frisky staff at a J. Crew sample sale. If you’ve been living under a rock, the game is simple. You start as an E-list celebrity, and then work your way up to the top via pointless exercises meant to enhance your personal #brand. Within the world of Kim Kardashian’s Hollywood, there is a work/life balance, just like in real life. To achieve fame, you not only hustle for your career. Dating is a powerful way to level up, earn more money, get more fans and generally achieve in life. Keep reading »

Dating Don’ts: On Second Shots & Rerun Relationships

Dating Don’ts: On Second Shots & Rerun Relationships

First, a story. A few years ago, I dated a guy I’ll call Jeff. We only saw each other romantically for a grand total of two months, but it was significant because Jeff was the first guy I had dated since the breakup of my engagement where it felt like I finally had let go of a lot of the baggage that comes with that kind of life-altering, trust-shattering heartbreak. I had dated a bit since that breakup, and even had a rocky six-month relationship at one point, but I was still so messed up. At first, dating Jeff felt like a breath of fresh air. I felt much more together emotionally, and he was courting me like an adult, planning actual dates and seemingly not playing any games. On paper, he seemed to have it together — a good job, aspirations, a positive outlook on the world and what he wanted to contribute to it. Physically, the relationship progressed at a much slower rate than I was used to — we only kissed for the first month — and I took my cues from him, convinced that this was a reflection of him taking me “seriously.” Keep reading »

Dating Don’ts: How To Handle Rejection In Dating

Like conducting a job search, online dating is an exercise in patience, compatibility, and, sometimes, rejection. It’s not romantic, but to a certain degree, the search for a suitable partner is not unlike the job hunt. You use the internet to varying degrees of success, clicking and writing emails and then clicking some more, and sometimes, if the cards are in your favor and the stars align, you end up meeting a stranger in a public setting and make awkward small talk while wearing shoes that pinch your toes and more makeup than you would for a Tuesday. When it’s over, you’re euphoric or despondent, alternating between mapping out a future for yourself or envisioning waiting for an email that never arrives. You follow up, you wait, things usually don’t pan out. When you do find success, you realize that it came the way most things in life happen — organically, through people you know. Matched with destiny, your future trips happily towards the light.

This is the best case scenario, a situation that everybody assures you will happen, regardless of how dire it all looks. Keep reading »

Dating Don’ts: Should You Unfriend Your Ex?

Dating Don’ts: Should You Unfriend Your Ex?

There’s a perverse pleasure in keeping tabs on your ex-paramours on social media. Perhaps you monitor their Twitter feed before you to go bed to see if you can gauge whether there was a more salacious reason behind their sudden decision to end things. Maybe after a couple glasses of wine and watching half of “The Notebook,” you find yourself scrolling through Instagram, making assessments about whether or not the person that showed up in their feed is a friend, a good coworker, or a cousin you never knew about. Maybe seeing the articles that they share from Upworthy and the Onion in your Facebook feed is a way of keeping them in your life, if even for a little while.

Whatever your reasons are, the need to keep up with people that you’re no longer involved with is very real, a secret shame that we don’t often feel comfortable talking about with others. It’s okay to maintain this behavior up until a certain point, but in every broken relationship’s wake, there comes a point when it’s time to unfriend, unfollow, block, and mute, to completely and totally DISCONNECT. Ripping off the Band-Aid sucks, but it’s necessary when you’re trapped in an unhealthy cycle of speculation three months or three years after you guys have ended things. But when is the appropriate time? Here are some potential situations you might find yourself in, and some gentle guidance on when and how to disconnect. Keep reading »

Dating Don’ts: 5 Scenarios In Which It Is Totally Okay To Ghost

Dating Don'ts: 5 Scenarios In Which It Is Totally Okay To Ghost
Dating Don'ts: Ghosting
Thou shalt not ghost your love interests. Read More »

My best friend went on a date with a man who seemed fine at first — they sat at a neighborhood bar and talked for hours. They went on a second date, but this time, the dude tried every trick in the book to get her to come to his place and have sex. She refused his offer, and tried to leave it be, but three days later, when she was visiting me from out of town, she showed me the text he sent, asking her in a very straightforward manner whether or not she was interested, or if her lack of communication was the hint that he needed.

“You have two options here,” I told her. “Write back with a one word answer, or just don’t respond.”

“I have to say something,” she said. “I can’t just ignore this.”

“Just ghost on him, dude,” I told her. “It’s easy.”

When is it appropriate to ghost? Some may say never, that each person deserves the courtesy of hearing directly that you’re not interested in them, but please, take a moment to think about how many times you’ve been ghosted, specifically how sometimes it was fine and sometimes it wasn’t. It goes both ways. Here are some common dating situations in which it’s perfectly fine to ghost. Keep reading »

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