Tag Archives: dater x

Dater X: I’ve Been Ghosted And It’s Bringing Up All The Feelings

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It’s been two days since I’ve heard from GQ, and to be honest, I’m in an anxiety spiral. Although there’s still a tiny part of me that’s hoping for the best, it appears I’ve been ghosted.

Last week, as I mentioned, I happily accepted when GQ asked me over for takeout and a movie. Although we ultimately opted against the takeout in favor of a quick trip to a cozy eatery near his apartment, the night went exactly according to plan. We laughed, talked, yes—slept together— and even made the decision to take down our online dating profiles. Keep reading »

Dater X: So This Is What Easy Feels Like

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When GQ and I met up at a trendy Italian restaurant on our second date, he immediately reminded me how different he is from other guys I’ve dated. He kissed me hello, opened the door for me, put his hand on the small of my back and led me inside the restaurant. While we waited for the hostess to look up our reservation, he leaned against the stand, and looked into my eyes like he’d taken seduction cues from Ryan Gosling in “Crazy Stupid Love.”

When we got to our table, he helped me take off my coat and pushed my chair in underneath me. I didn’t even know people still did that; I’ve certainly never had the pleasure of dating anyone who engaged in chivalry. Over dinner, we swapped tales of teenage rebellion. I told him all about my childhood bedroom, which had a door that led right outside, and how I’d sneak out to round third base with my boyfriend in the woods near my house. He told me about the time he and his friends got caught drinking at a football game in high school and the principal insisted on calling his very conservative, very strict parents to come pick him up. Our conversation continued, and we even got into some deeper topics like religion, abortion and health care, sharing our viewpoints and seeing if our perspectives matched up— they did. I’d been wondering if GQ is religious, so I saw an open window when we started talking about how I gave up biting my nails for Lent. Keep reading »

Dater X: There’s No Such Thing As The Perfect Guy…Or Is There?

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Sometimes in life, opportunities come along that seem way too good to be true: a promising job offer that allows you to work from home with unlimited sick days, winning an all-expenses-paid trip for two to Bermuda, and in my case, meeting a man online who goes by the handle HoopTR46. 

I opened his message on Wednesday morning, and immediately noticed how drop dead gorgeous he was. I’m talking tall, dark and handsome, straight-off-the-pages-of-GQ gorgeous. He had thick, well-shaped eyebrows and mesmerizing, forest green eyes. After checking out his profile, I learned that he was my age, has a prestigious role at a well-known advertising company (which happens to be only one block from my office), that he’s very well-traveled, has a great education, is witty, athletic, spontaneous and overall too good to be true. But what did I have to lose? Keep reading »

Dater X: Owning Up To My Dating Dealbreakers

Dater X: Owning Up To My Dating Dealbreakers

Now that I’ve been single for a couple of weeks, I’ve been upping my online dating game in hopes of meeting some eligible bachelors. I spent a solid three hours this weekend updating my OKCupid profile, adding new photos of myself and just seeing what’s out there, and I even created a profile on HowAboutWe.com. Since then, I’ve found myself chatting with a handful of potentials— a witty lawyer, a CrossFit enthusiast (I know, I know), a financial consultant and a bearded guy who works for an airline, whom I’ve appropriately nicknamed “Wings.”

In the past, I took a pretty reserved approach to online dating, letting others message me first and skimming through my messages every once in a blue moon. But this time around, I’m doing things differently. I’m going to reach out to the people I want to talk to and cut through the bullshit early on by being my most honest self from the get-go. If your first message to me simply says “hi,” without any thought behind it, I’m deleting it. If your profile is vague and you’re not making an effort, I’m not interested. The old me is gone, and the new, no-nonsense dater is here to stay. Thankfully, my new approach seems to be paying off. After multiple exchanges back and forth with Mr. CrossFit, I received a very straightforward message from him in response to my telling him I’m a “picky dater.”

“So am I,” he confessed. “So, let’s be straight with each other. What are your dating dealbreakers? Please, be 100 percent open and honest.” Keep reading »

Dater X: Missing Him Or Missing The Idea Of Him?

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Well, I successfully made it through Valentine’s Day without needing Xanax or calling an ex-boyfriend, so I’d say it was a great success. But before I headed out on February 14th for a singles’ feast and game night with some of my favorite ladies, I heard from Officer Handsoming. Shocked to see his name appear on my phone, I felt equal parts annoyed and surprised that he’d reach out on Valentine’s Day, since his lack of planning for the holiday ultimately fueled our split.

“Hey. How’d you make it through the snowstorm?” his text read.

“Fine, thanks. Have you had many stabbings and out-of-control ex-boyfriend bonfires to tend to today?” I joked, knowing he was on the clock.

“Not so far, but there’s still time,” he wrote with a wink emoticon. “My schedule changed and I’m no longer working overnight. What are you up to tonight?” Keep reading »

Dater X: Another One Bites The Dust

Dater X: Another One Bites The Dust

Officer Handsoming arrived at my apartment with a carton of chicken noodle soup in one hand and a greasy bag of french fries in the other, unsure which I preferred when nursing a hangover.

How thoughtful, I said to myself while we plopped down on my couch to watch “Silver Linings Playbook.” I cracked open the soup, unwrapped the fries and picked at both, before asking him what his schedule looked like this week. In between bites of his burger, he ran through an endless list of court dates, night shifts, day shifts and apartment searching appointments.

“I noticed you casually skipped right over Valentine’s Day,” I said, playfully.

“I told you, I have to work on Valentine’s Day. And all weekend, for that matter,” he said, his eyes fixed on the TV.

“But still, don’t you want to acknowledge it at all? Maybe next weekend, when you’re off, we can go away and stay in a hotel for a night or something…” I offered.

I knew that this was the beginning of the end. A few minutes later, he broke his silence.

“What’s the matter? You’re mad at me now because I didn’t plan anything for Valentine’s Day, aren’t you?” he asked.

“I’m concerned,” I said matter-of-factly. “About us.” Keep reading »

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