Don’t mind me, just bawling at my desk because Sarah Silverman’s 19-year-old dog Duck died and she wrote the loveliest obituary for him. It will rip your heart open and make you want to run home and squeeze the bejeezus out of your pet, which is what I am going to do right now. Luuuuuuuucccccca! Mommy loves you so much!!!! Sob. RIP Duck Silverman. You were clearly a great dog and very, very loved. [Who Say]
This adorable little goat was bitten by a pony when she was just four days old. (Memo to that pony: what the hell kind of a pony bites a baby goat?! You’re being a pony wrong!) The attack damaged her spine and left her unable to use her back legs until recently, when her zookeepers fashioned a custom wheelchair for her out of a wheeled crate. Now this goat can be seen happily walking/wheeling around the zoo alongside her able-bodied siblings. Say it with me now: Squeeeeeeeee! [Metro]
They say those that cannot paint, write. Well, not actually. But as someone with absolutely zero artistic talent, I’m in awe of this monkey’s prize-winning artwork. Brent, a chimpanzee who lives at Chimp Haven in Louisiana, was awarded a $10,000 prize for his painting. Thirty-seven-year-old Brent is a retired lab monkey, who now lives at the rescue center. Brent’s winnings will go toward supporting Chimp Haven’s work.
And if you’re curious just how you get a chimp to paint, the answer is: very carefully. The canvases were held outside of each monkey’s enclosure while it went to town with tempera paint. “If we handed the canvas to them where it was on the inside, they might not want to hand it back,” said Chimp Haven prez Cathy Willis Spraetz. “They might throw it around and step on it.” (Me too, Brent, me too.) [Neatorama]
I consider Lil Bub meeting Grumpy Cat as akin as to when Churchill met with Roosevelt. The two greatest cat powers on the continent, combining forces for cuteness. Watch as Bub and Grumps warily address one another at the second annual Internet Cat Festival in Minneapolis, Minnesota. This is my couch space, Bub says, tongue out, head forward. O RLY? Grumpy Cat responds, unsure of whether to tentatively put one paw forward for peace. How did the meeting end? WIth lots of purrs, we hope. [YouTube]
Jessica is out on vacation this week, and that’s left me to cover the amazingly cute panda cub beat. I don’t mind though, because these twin panda cubs, born at the Atlanta Zoo, exist somewhere on the scale between mind-blowingly cute and breathtakingly adorable. The little buggers are about a month old, and weigh just four pounds, which is huge compared to their wee size when they were born. Zoo staff have to rotate them out of their mother’s care every four hours, which means that a few lucky Atlanta Zoo staffers get to spend all their time with these little buggers. I’m so jealous. [CNN]
Cat-holding! You’re doing it wrong. Let Macklemore show you how to properly wrangle and pet a cat — especially one who displays a shocking level of indifference/hatred regarding your very existence. It can be done, and Macklemore can help you do it, but you’ve got to be careful. Other suggested future Macklemore how-to videos include “How To Be Macklemore’s Girlfriend” and “How to Get Macklemore To Make Out With You.” Just a suggestion. [YouTube]