Once this guy I was messaging with on an online dating website starting talking about the “holy trinity of Internet cats: Lil Bub, Maru, and Grumpy Cat.” I asked him to marry me. He didn’t respond. That’s what popped into my head when I saw Maru had a new video out about all the things he can do with his paws. Spoiler alert: the same things all cats can do. But, you know, this one is Maru. [YouTube]
My big sister Allison egregiously aids and abets my panda obsession. She is the one responsible for almost all my panda crap, most of which sits on the bookshelf above my desk at work: panda mug, panda PEZ dispenser, panda eraser, twin panda Christmas ornaments, a panda figurine, and a panda T-shirt. Now, I have a new panda knickknack I covet: a micro crochet mohair panda. You read that right! This made-to-order panda cutie measures in at 0.8 inches, making him smaller than the pad of your finger. What the shit do I need a micro crochet mohair panda for? Especially one retailing for a cool $78? Who the fuck cares! Allison, my birthday is coming up. [Etsy]
You didn’t know you needed to watch this, did you? But you do. You need to watch two minutes of goats yelling like humans. Just like humans. It’s unnerving. It’s annoying. It’s not at all adorable, but still completely fascinating.
This is Colonel Mustard. He’s often the first thing I see in the morning and the last thing I see at night. In the evening, he likes to sit on my chest while I’m in bed and trying to read a book. He’ll swat at the pages until I pet him, and when I do, he purrs like a lawn mower tearing down some tall grass. In the morning, he follows me into the bathroom and talks to me while I’m trying to brush my teeth. He is a small, furry, very demanding child.
I have had Mustard — he also goes by Moo Moo, Moutard, The Colonel, The Kern-Dog and Dijonaisse (when he’s feeling saucy) — for going on three years. He was a rescue that I took on as a foster, but when I saw his huge paws — he’s got 7 toes on each front paw and six on the back — I knew I had to keep him. He sheds a lot, and twice yearly, he gets his bushy Maine Coon fur shaved into a lion cut. He also talks a lot. Like, all the time. And when he’s not talking, he’s purring, very loudly. It is crazy. Keep reading »
This week, we heard about Chris P. Bacon, the piglet on wheels, and a goldfish who floats with the help of a harness. You thought you had things hard, you ain’t got nothin’ on these physically challenged animals. These dogs, cats, pigs and alpacas (yes, that’s right, alpacas) were born just a little bit different, but thanks to their kind human helpers, they’ve been given a new lease on life.
And if you want to support a non-profit that helps animals like these, check out Rolling Dog Farm. For more information on animal wheelchairs, check out: Pets With Disabilities , K-9 Cart Company, Eddieswheelz and RuffRollin.
Last time we checked in with Xiao Liwu, the baby panda at the San Diego Zoo, he was more fluffy and roly-poly. These days, the 26-week-old panda cub is looking more like an actual bear than a puffball, but he’s still as wiggly as can be. All together now: Squeeeeeee!
Lately, my mom has been getting her kicks by emailing me photos of animals she thinks I’ll find terrifying and asking me if I like them. Very funny. See, she knows all about my fear of birds, and I’m pretty sure she thought my slideshow on the scariest-looking animals on earth was the funniest thing I’ve ever written. Clearly, she’s pushing me to do a followup by emailing me photos of weird looking beasts. Like this fluffy guy above. It’s hard for me to imagine a more upsetting animal — feathers, beady little eyes, the misleading vibe that it’s full of peace and tranquility — but luckily, it is imaginary. It was dreamt up by a pair of artists, thank god.
So, nice try with this one, Mom. This freak of nature may not make the cut, but these 13 other members of the Animal Kingdom do scare the shit out of me…
Want to feel slightly depressed? There are people who spend more on their dog’s annual wardrobes than most people do on their own in 10 years. Meet the couture dogs of New York, the subject of a new book by Paul Nathan. This expansive volume features people with an excess of money, time and love to give to their furry friends. Some of the outfits are incredibly over the top. Most of the models were on point, though there was one, uh, mishap. “Most of the dogs were well behaved but Tasha and Cuba, who are married and who are photographed together in some of the pictures, had sexual relations as soon as we finished the shoot, which I thought was quite brazen,” said Nathan in an interview with Fashionista. Wait, married dogs? What? [Fashionista] Keep reading »
Now in its ninth year, the Puppy Bowl is the soft cuddly alternative to the Super Bowl. And thank God. We wait in anticipation for the Bowl to begin each year, and enjoy the puppies frolicking and running around so much.
It’s not all fun and barks, either. “The puppy players viewed me more as fresh meat than a ref last year,” explains returning referee Dan Schachner. “It took a few hard-hitting plays for them to realize their overwhelming cuteness and basset hound eyes wouldn’t affect my judgment to fairly officiate this game.” (Animal Planet, if you ever need a new Puppy Bowl ref, let me know!)
This year, we’re excited to reveal that the Puppy Bowl will now include … drumroll please … hedgehog cheerleaders! And while we don’ have any photos of the ‘hogs in their outfits yet, I’ve created an artistic rendering of what they might look like, above. Now, don’t forget to watch Puppy Bowl IX on Animal Planet starting at 3 p.m. EST on Feb. 3, ya hear? [MNN]
There’s one reason and one reason only that I actually get excited for the Super Bowl each year … no, not the promise of taut man asses you can bounce a quarter off of — the Puppy Bowl! Animal Planet holds their epic puppy playtime extravaganza every Super Bowl Sunday and it’s always incredibly squee-worthy — and they’ve finally released the starting lineup of pawed players. Ravens versus 40ers? Pshaw! It’s all about Biscuit versus Fitz! Hmm, or Tuck versus Trinket. Now, I usually root the dogs which most resemble my girl Lucca, but truth be told, I wouldn’t kick any of these cuties out of bed for biting my toes. Click on through and tell us who your faves are!