Every few years some enterprising publisher knocks off the world’s most famous “how to change yourself to get a man to love you” book, The Rules (which itself knocks off Fascinating Womanhood). We know what condescending “rules” these books teach: men are simple, men are visual creatures, don’t nag them or they turn into little boys, men like to “chase.” The #1 rule is generally a version of be “Put away your penis!”, as Patti Stanger might say.
The 2011 incarnation is The Man Whisperer: A Gentle, Results-Oriented Approach To Communication, a book about “a new method of communication” called (duh) Man Whispering. Penned by “dating experts” Donna Sozio and Samantha Brett, I want to say it’s like The Rules on steroids, but really it’s like The Rules after a few too many Cosmos: Whoever wrote this must have been drunk. Did I say Cosmos? Scratch that. Four Lokos.
So, I bravely fished The Man Whisperer out of the The Frisky’s “books to donate” pile and got reading. Here’s what I learned: Keep reading »
Do you have a standard email sign-off you use like “Thanks,” “Cheers,” or “Best”? Do you change your sign-offs for business emails? I tend to stick with the ol’ XOXO or my first initial (or both) in my personal emails with close friends and use “Thanks” or very occasionally “Cheers” in my business emails. I almost always use “Love” as a sign-off when emailing with my mom, because that’s the sign-off she uses and I like to let her know it’s reciprocated (we aren’t big on saying the “L” word out loud in my family, so it’s nice to sneak it in in an email). And when I email with Dear Wendy letter writers, I use “All the best” as a sign-off because I really do wish them the best. The New York Times published an article recently about email sign-offs — the anxiety they can cause for people and the messages they often send. For example, signing off with “XOXO” might give the wrong message to a co-worker. Thank God I read the Times or I may never have realized this. What other messages might you be sending in your email sign-off?
Keep reading »
It strikes me as interesting that a short but sweet essay on the benefits of having a sister, called “Why Sisterly Chats Make People Happier,” has been one of the most popular articles on The New York Times website for over a week. The essay is in response to a recent Brigham Young University study which claims that men who have sisters are happier than those who don’t. The essay’s author, linguist Deborah Tannen, expands the discussion to theorize that this is because women, and thus sisters, are more talkative, so they are better at communicating … Keep reading »
It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing today. After the jump, we hear from “First-Timer” who wrote to me way back in January when her first serious relationship started floundering after three years and communication with her boyfriend took a nosedive. “I know we both have busy schedules and recently, fewer opportunities to see each other, but I’m beginning to wonder if I’m being selfish in thinking that he could do more in keeping us connected in these times when we’re apart,” she wrote. Keep reading »
I’m not even going to pretend that I understand the first thing about men. They remain a mystery to me and I have no choice but to love them for that. But every now and then they say stuff that truly baffles us. After the jump, Frisky staffers share the strangest things dudes have said to them. What were they thinking? If you have any insight, please offer your interpretations because we don’t have a clue. Or feel free to chime in with your own offerings.
Keep reading »
Getting what you want out of your sex life can be extraordinarily difficult for the simple reason that there’s another human being involved (usually). Not many of us are gifted communicators, much less communicators of sexual wants and desires, who can be inoffensive and still get what we want; however, there are a few basic rules of expressing yourself sexually that you could all do with learning. Read more … Keep reading »