According to the UK documentary “My Sex Robot,” by the year 2050, most men will either be screwing or be married to a sexbot because “you can not catch a disease from her, she cannot say no to you, she’s always willing to please you.” Lurvely. The future is here in a new ad for the 2014 Kia Forte. The technologically forward thinking commercial features a sexbot passenger hot enough to rev a man’s engine and strong enough to yank his street light. Wink. Wink. [Jezebel]
Growing up, my parents were so anti-advertising that they made us mute the volume and cover the TV with a scarf during commercials. And look at me now! Rounding up the best and worst commercials shown during the Super Bowl. How far I’ve come… Keep reading »
Meet Megan and Matt. They’re the stars of the newest Weight Watchers commercial featuring Jennifer Hudson. And they are a terrible couple. Megan plays the role of the nagging wife to a T — to the point where every time I watch this commercial (which is a lot lately because we are working from home this week), I just think, Oh man, those two are heading for divorce. The clip involves Megan basically emasculating Matt and telling the world how she does everything. He passively aggressively says, “She usually gets her way, and I just go along with it,” while she snipes, “I think [Weight Watchers] worked for Matt because I did it for him.” And then she ends the commercial with “Happy wife, happy life, right?” Oh, that old trope. Take note, Weight Watchers: women don’t like to be sold things by terrible, naggy ladies. It’s an old, stupid stereotype, so stop it, guys.
Oh, Europeans. Here’s a new commercial from Hyundai Netherlands for their Sante Fe vehicle. The ad is creepily called “Upskirt” and definitely pushes the boundaries of what you can do to sell cars here in the United States. The premise is about as unoriginal as any other car commercial: sexy ladies swooning over a new car. But in this ad, it’s an ice cream-meltingly hot day, the ladies are sexily dampened with sweat and not wearing a bra under an opaque blouse (because we do that — right, ladies?). Sex sells here too, but it’s oftentimes sold in innuendo or pun form. Hyundai Netherlands, however, goes whole (horny) hog with gratuitous hard nipples and a blowing-in-the-wind upskirt panties shot. Keep reading »
On March 15 of this year, I wrote you a letter in reference to your commercial featuring Corn Dog Girl, wherein I raised many questions and concerns. Those questions still remain unanswered. But I am still hopeful for your response.
Onto the real reason I’m writing. In paragraph two of my March 15 query, I mentioned, in passing, my thoughts about your commercials featuring Shannen Doherty:
“I kind of got the one with Shannen Doherty. But not really. Is Shannen done being an actress? Or is she going to college to do research for a part? And why does her face look so strange? It doesn’t really look like she’s had work done. But there is something weird going on with her mouth, right?”
Keep reading »
I do appreciate the convenience of having a personal toilet nearby at all times, but toilet bikes just seem a little excessive. Japanese toilet manufacturer TOTO introduced the latest in motorcycle/toilet technology with their “Toilet Bike Neo.”
The eco-friendly motorcycle, with a built-in custom toilet, runs on bio-fuel from animal “discharge” or “waste water,” which I’m assuming is the nice way to say pee and poop. And I don’t think the toilet actually talks like it does in the commercial, although that could be fun. Right now, it’s just a prototype designed to promote awareness about bathroom emissions and water conservation. So you can’t purchase yours just yet. [National Post]
Axe hits a new low in advertising with this commercial starring a headless pair of boobs on legs, supposedly representing the office crush. Yup, the love interest in this commercial is just a pair of tits. A Cousin Itt-inspired walking head of hair — meant to represent, ha ha, “what girls see first” on a man — pines over the headless boobs throughout the ad only to finally get her at the end. More creepy than funny, I think. If I were a dude, I’d be offended 1) that advertisers think I’ll buy their hair gel because they showed me (silicone? paper mache?) boobies, 2) that men are one-dimensional: Grunt. Grunt. Boobs. Buy hair gel. Boooooobs.
And I’m not just saying that because this commercial thoughtlessly ignores all the ass men out there. Think of the poor, neglected ass men, Axe! [Ad Week]
Ashton Kutcher is in trouble. Again. The “Two and a Half Men” star recently filmed an ad for PopChips which spoofed online dating. In the ad, Kutcher dons “brown face” to play an Indian man, amongst other characters. The ad sparked immediate controversy when it was unleashed on the web yesterday, with many critics saying the portrayal was stereotypical and racist, and PopChips has since pulled the ad and apologized. I will never ever ever understand how blatantly offensive ads like this make it all the way through the creative process without someone saying, “Uh, guys? Maybe this is a bad idea?” As for Ashton? Sorry, but dude is as dumb in real life as his character on “That ’70s Show.” This is hardly the first time he’s said or done something totally stupid. Remember when he got all pissy on Twitter about Joe Paterno being fired? Ugh. [MTV]
Today in Awkward Diplomatic Kerfluffles: the entire country of Ukraine is pissed at the entire country of The Netherlands for airing a commercial that implies sexy, sexy Ukrainian women are a bunch of husband-stealing sexpots. The ad was made by a Dutch energy company called NLE and references the Euro 2012 soccer games, which will be hosted by the Ukraine. (On a side note, any other Americans find it utterly impossible to keep Europoeans and their various soccer tournaments straight?!) The ad shows a woman Googling the words “Ukrainian women” and coming up with images of super sexy hot Ukrainian ladies. She then immediately goes and purchases an at-home beer tap, presumably so her husband will stay on his couch and not leave her for some random blonde chick in the Ukraine during a soccer match. Ukraine is now pissy that the commercial will affect tourism during the Euro 2012 games. Keep reading »
That wasn’t the beginning of a pervy joke. What drain cleaner and double penetration have in common is this Liquid Plumber Double Impact commercial. I think this might be the most pornographic advertisement I’ve ever seen. “Snake your drain.” “Flush your pipe.” Wow. Oh, and the double entendre-laden Barry White-esque voiceover just takes it to another level. I don’t think unclogging my drain will ever be the same again. [WOW]