Britney Spears first debuted her manufactured makeover in an ad for Candie’s shoes. Standing next to yummy desserts and a pink polo-ed prince charming, Brit-Brit’s “Barbie” look is admittedly better than, well, being bald. Now Candie’s has released a new commercial featuring Britney. In it, Britney keeps up the Barbie fairytale, eyeing a polo-playing prepster who will hopefully fall for her because of her rockin’ Candie’s shoes. In true Britney style, she follows her man around a mansion singing a Britney exclusive, “Radar.” Is it just me or does the song sound oddly similar to “Womanizer?” [via Jezebel] 

North Carolina does not like A-holes ... or B-holes. Several NC media companies have their panties in a twist over a new Hardee’s ad and are refusing to run the hilarious/suggestive ad which asks whether people prefer the taste of A-holes or B-holes. But get your mind out of the butt-er. (Ha!) I’m talkin’ about doughnut holes. The ad pits regular doughnut holes (A-holes) against Hardee’s new Biscuit holes with icing (B-holes) in a random taste test. The results: “A-holes are too small,” says one man. “I’m just a B-hole kind of guy.” [News & Observer] 

Does seeing a used condom wrapper instantly make you want to hop in the sack? Well, Durex thinks so. In a new commercial for their rubbers, the company encourages people of all ages and sexual orientations to bump it out. One couple starts the trouble when their Durex condom wrapper flies out the window and flutters around town to a catchy tune, sexing up whomever it touches. A teen couple stops “studying” when they see the wrapper (like they really were anyway), gramps and granny skip tea time to get their kettles boiling, two male cops realize their “man-in-uniform” fantasies, and a woman closes the shutters to heat up a cocktail party … much like rich British people do on weekends. In fact, this commercial would be a great visual in British sex ed classes. Watch and get inspired. [Gawker]   

Before he was Patrick Bateman, or Batman, or that questionably unsexy temper tantrum throwing douche that we know and love, Christian Bale had a thing for Pac-Man shaped cereal. Luckily he was adorable back then, so posting this ‘80s commercial probably won’t make him mad. [Copyranter]

The holiday season is filled with so many awkward family moments. Like, “Oh, pajamas. They’re, um… pink!” Or, “It’s a good thing Grandpa switched his prostate meds.” It can be scary stuff people, but I didn’t want to freak you out before you got cornered by a week’s worth of bonding time. Now that we’ve all officially survived the triumvirate of American high holy days, we can finally breathe a sigh of relief and laugh at this vintage mother/daughter moment. It left me with a not so fresh feeling—my lunch making its way back up. Guaranteed, nobody’s vagina stinks as much as this conversation.

America’s hottest athletes have recreated Tom Cruise’s infamous pants off dance off scerne in “Risky Business”.  Okay, so I know the ménage typically comes in trois/three, and there are four players here. However, there were only three boys brave enough to really show some skin.  Seriously, Kobe Bryant totally wussed out with those basketball shorts.  But still, you had me at Tony Hawk riding in on a skateboard wearing nuthin’ but a helmet and a drum kit. And those boxer briefs really show off A-Rod’s awesome butt!  I’d love to see the bonus footage from this shoot, if you know what I mean. [World of Wonder]

Fall is what I like to call pantyhose season.  Nothing makes me feel more ladylike than silk, er synthetic, stockings.  When it gets cold enough to wear them, they give me flawlessly smooth gams which in turn let’s me wear even shorter skirts. You know the fabulous woman in this totally 80’s No Nonsense commercial agrees, ho(se) are in style no matter the decade!

Wham, bam, thank you, ma’am! Sometimes sex is best when its quick, because lord knows we’ve got things to do besides you. Sex can be short and sweet when you’re on-the-go, so long as you are set up for a rip roaring time. But where and how can you get a Big O swifter than a Big Mac?

Don’t Change That Dial Accost him when the TV show he’s watching hits commercial, and challenge him to get off before the break ends.

Call in for Delivery Afternoon delights turn lunchtime into dessert. Set up an impromptu meeting to take advantage of your man and your mid-day break.

Eva Mendes just can’t catch a break.  The beauty with an ugly habit had to postpone being a spokesmodel for Calvin Klein to check into rehab earlier this year.  While the fashion house stuck by her in her time of need, now the fragrance commercial she finally made can’t even get on the air because, as a CK rep says, “There’s a lot of skin.” Banned by networks in the US, the spot for Secret Obsession is too hot for TV…and even YouTube. It might not be safe for work, but at least we can watch this Calvin Klein men’s underwear fashion show instead! [Trend Hunter]

When you’re a struggling actor, getting cast in a commercial is a big deal. But when you go on to become a teacher and the commercial gets posted on YouTube and discovered by your students, it’s an even bigger deal. Especially when your “acting” means pretending to do it on a desk. British teacher Sarah Greene has been suspended from her job because of her participation in a racy commercial for a clothing company years ago. We think the commercial is kind of amazing—plus, she advocates safe sex in the ad by pulling out a condom. [The Daily Mirror]