Tag Archives: cohabitations

Dear Wendy: “If I Buy A Home, I’ll Lose My Boyfriend”

Wendy AtterberryFebruary 23, 2010 //

I currently live with my boyfriend in a rental apartment. I really hate renting and want to buy property and though I can afford to buy something on my own, my boyfriend can’t and is putting a lot of restrictions of what kind of housing he’d be willing to move into. For example, he knows I can only afford a condo or co-op, but has said he’ll only live in a private house, and basically, if I buy an apartment, our relationship is over. Everything in the place we’re currently living in is broken and we have a lot of problems with our landlord, so even if I don’t find something to buy, I would still like to move when the lease is up, but my boyfriend even has a lot of requirements for that. He has to have parking and outdoor space for a grill, but we live in New York, and finding a rental we could afford that has both those amenities is very hard. We’ve lived together for four years and I cannot picture my life without him, but I feel that his laundry list of requirements and preferences for housing are keeping me from moving out of a place I really hate living in, and holding me back from doing something that would really benefit me. How can I make him understand how important it is to me to move, and hopefully into something I own and not just rent? How can I make him understand that we are wasting money on rent? At the very least I would like to move into a cheaper rental so I could save money to purchase a home. He would also be able to save money too, but all he sees is that parking spot! — Wants To Move

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Girl Talk: I Lived With A Hoarder

Judy McGuireDecember 3, 2009 //

Have you been watching “Hoarders” on A&E? If you’re unfamiliar, each episode documents the lives of two of the estimated three million Americans who are so compulsive about accumulating crap of all kinds that they’ve lost the ability to function normally.

Until I was assigned this story, I didn’t watch it. I like crappy reality shows as much as the next lady, but this one didn’t appeal to me—I’d already lived it. Keep reading »

Girl Talk: Is It Bad To Live Together Before Marriage?

Ami AngelowiczJuly 27, 2009 //

It’s undeniable that marriage and relationships in general look nothing like they did 40 years ago. What’s happened? Women’s lib, skyrocketing divorce rates, the death of the nuclear family — and that’s just for starters. The whole game has changed. Sometimes I think that each generation exhibits a reactionary trend to their predecessors. I am part of the “divorced parents” era. Although my parents are still married, about 60 percent of all people I meet my age come from broken homes. While this phenomenon didn’t necessarily make us “anti-marriage,” it has certainly made us “marriage cautious” or “marriage disillusioned.” As a modern woman I know the statistics – if I ever do tie the knot, I know it ain’t gonna be all sunshine and roses. And that’s why I plan to be as sure as I can possibly, possibly be. Before I exchange any vows, I’ve made a vow to myself: I MUST live with someone before I marry him. I’m not alone in this thinking. About 70 percent of couples are cohabitating before marriage these days. Keep reading »

First Time For Everything: Shacking Up

Marissa WillmanSeptember 29, 2008 //

You truly don’t know your man until you perform the ultimate test of compatibility. No, it does not involve signing up on eHarmony.com to see if you’re meant to be. To know if your love will last until the end of your days, you must do the inevitable: Move in together.

When my boyfriend of a year and I considered signing a lease together at the beginning of this year, the prospect of living together was a dream come true. I, like many other women, naively thought shacking up was the natural first step to happily-ever-after. Through my rose-colored glasses, I envisioned our bond strengthening and our relationship evolving. Best of all, we’d be together all the time.
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Three Questions To Ask Yourself Before Moving In Together

Lindsay A.July 18, 2008 //

It’s almost August 1…which means a couple things. One, I need to return that skirt I just bought or I’ll be broke at rent time. And two, leases are coming to an end, which means more and more couples will take the plunge and move in with each other.

As someone who just took the plunge and moved in with her boyfriend for the first time, I can tell you it’s everything it’s cracked up to be. It’s fun, convenient, cost-effective, and the next logical step in our relationship. But how are you supposed to know when it’s the right time? Keep reading »