In 2008 Lady Gaga gave the world the gift of a song where she refers to her vagina as a Christmas tree, suggesting that she has a serious misunderstanding of how at least one of those works. Between that and other recent tracks, like Nate Dogg rapping about getting holiday head and the beloved family classic “Father Christmas Fucked My Pussy,” it’s easy to assume that modern perverts have ruined a once-innocent holiday with sexualized music. Read more on Cracked…
Christmas music is a fun way to get into the spirit of the Christmas season as a whole (provided you don’t work in retail, in which case you’re probably sick of them by December 2). Christmas songs are fun to sing along with while you’re wrapping gifts, decorating your tree, hanging your Christmas lights, or just chugging eggnog and rum from the carton on your couch. (Really, who are you to judge me?) Read more on YourTango.com…
I find the holidays generally pretty depressing, but oddly enough, I LOVE Christmas music. Like, I could listen to it year round. Nothing lifts my spirits like the opening bars of “Jingle Bell Rock” and “Silent Night.” Reese Witherspoon is also a fan of Christmas carols, so she agreed to sing “Silent Night” on “The Tonight Show” — only the lyrics had been changed to random and wonky phrases. The “Wild” actress actually has a decent set of pipes — remember her singing as June Carter Cash in “Walk The Line”? — but the sudden change in lyrics proved to be a bit of struggle. It’s okay, you don’t need to sing in tune to get into the holiday spirit.
I have a new favorite Christmas song that I firmly believe should take the place of “Christmas Shoes” on every radio station during the holiday season. (Let’s be honest, that song is hella depressing and has no place wedged in between “Jingle Bells” and “All I Want For Christmas Is You.”) Kristen Bell joined a cappella group Straight No Chaser to create a modern day Christmas carol called “Text Me Merry Christmas,” which basically sums up every interaction I’ve had on December 25th for the last five years.
Text me Merry Christmas/ Send a selfie too/ If you do, I’ll go ‘Neath the mistletoe/ And pretend my screen is you/ Show me that you love me/ Text xo to kiss and hug me/ I’ll be right here waiting/ For my pants to start vibrating.
Check out the music video for the (fingers crossed) new holiday classic, and view the full lyrics after the jump! “Text Me Merry Christmas” will be available on iTunes tonight at midnight, so get your texting fingers ready. Keep reading »
If I was a celebrity, I would be just like Mariah Carey. She’s got a “pink room” — that she doesn’t let her kids into — in her home filled with pink cushions and rugs and a chandelier (obvs). Her Christmas tree is decorated with dozens of real peonies. And she gave this entire interview while wearing a silky cream-colored robe and Agent Provocateur slippers, which she takes off and tosses on the floor at the end. How do I say this? I LOVE HER. Also, I didn’t know until watching this clip but Mariah Carey actually co-wrote “All I Want For Christmas Is You,” AKA the best Christmas song ever. “I wanted to make the most festive song that would always make people happy,” she said. All this time I had no idea! Is it possible to love her even more? [TODAY]
The key to making a good holiday mix is to not overdo it. You’ve got to include tons of holiday tracks, yes, but you should also add some non-Christmas-y stuff, too. Otherwise your mix will start to sound like the tacky Christmas music loop you hear in Macy’s or something. Plus, you’ve gotta mix some non-traditional Christmas hits with Mariah Carey, too. Check out our XXXMas list after the jump!
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