Sooo Christina Aguilera‘s home was featured recently in InStyle. (Check out her massive shoe closet here.) What really struck me, though, was her love of vignettes, which she used to display some of her treasured possessions like shoes and past performance costumes. I kind of like to think of vignettes as the adult version of dioramas, and who didn’t like creating those when they were in school? They’re perfect for occupying a little space in a room, on a table, or in a bookcase. After the jump I have some tips for adding a vignette to your decor.

In NYMag.com’s latest monthly roundup of the fashion glossies, “The Best and Worst of October Magazines,” they’ve deemed this In Style photograph of Christina Aguilera in her closet as one of the best. Look, I’m all for ostentatious displays of wealth—I only wish I had more wealth to display ostentatiously—but this photograph is obscene and depressing. Does one woman really need this many pairs of shoes, so many that she needs a ladder to reach some of them? What hole in your insides are you trying to fill that that many shoes will never fill anyway? And her son standing there, looking at the camera, like, Can you believe how depressing this is?, made me experience the existential sadness of living in a celebrity-worshiping capitalist culture that prizes material wealth above, say, motherhood. Then I clicked on to the next page. [NYMag.com]

Well jeez, melt my cold, dead heart, why don’t you Xtina? The singer opened up to E! News about her relationship with her husband, Jordan Bratman, and describes how growing up without a positive male role model makes her appreciate him even more as a partner and father.

Pitchfork says the kick-ass electro-punk group, Le Tigre, is working on music with Christina Aguilera of all people. Presumably they’re doing music for X-tina’s new album, since JD Samson recently told NickyDigital.com that Le Tigre won’t be touring again “anytime in the near future.” (Kathleen Hanna has been teaching at NYU, Johanna Fateman recently had a baby, and JD Samson has been DJing with a group called MEN.) Oh, poo. Well, at least we’ll hear Christina get their beats dirrty. But still…what’s next? Ani Di Franco and Miley? Cowboy Junkies and Taylor Swift? Ooh wait, that would be kind of awesome. [Pitchfork]

According to Variety, peroxided songstress Christina Aguilera will be starring in her own version of “Showgirls”: “Burlesque.” Watch out “Striptease”! Aguilera will play an “ambitious small-town girl with a big voice who finds love, family and success in a Los Angeles neo-burlesque club that appears to be right out of Bob Fosse’s ‘Cabaret.’” That’s weird. That’s the story of my life. (Call my lawyer!) The script was written by Steve Antin, brother of Robin Antin, who created the Pussycat Dolls, and Jonathan Antin, who does famous people’s hair. Twenty bucks says Aguilera’s character will work at Forty Deuce, home of that LA neo-burlesque to which they are referring. Luckily, like Demi in “Striptease” before her, Aguilera’s got the knockers for this thong, pasties, and feathers role. Let’s just hope she don’t have a “Glitter” on her hands. [Dlisted]

Christina Aguilera is nearly unrecognizable on the cover of the Fall/Winter issue of Citizen K magazine. One could peruse the full set before realizing the otherworldly looking blond is the pop-songstress, her facial features and body proportions rescaled, tweaked, and airbrushed into identity-altering dimensions. And these days, when it comes to the Photoshop awards, women are not the only contenders. Alongside Britney Spears, Madonna, and Jessica Alba, Tom Cruise and Brad Pitt are getting the Photoshopped-into-oblivion treatment, too. Feminists have long said that women are held to ridiculous expectations when it comes to their looks—but nowadays it seems like men are being expected to look a lot more like robots than humans. So what do you think? Are men increasingly being held to the same scrutiny as women in terms of their physical appearance?

MUSIC

• Guns N’ Roses Chinese Democracy Axl Rose’s anthemic rock voice still makes my panties wetter than the November rain. Chinese Democracy, inflated by all the hype and a very, very long wait, surprisingly lives up to its promise—even with the all new band line-up. “Better” has some of the sickest guitar squeals and “IRS” crunches the classic GNR sound. So, “This I Love” makes me think Axl wants to sing on Broadway, and his mid-life crisis frat bro meets Rasta look isn’t sexy, but the music is still solid gold. This is not an album GNR could have made in the ‘80s when they were kids. It’s a bold, fresh, marvelous record that’ll bury Axl’s eccentricities and lift him up like the awesome rock star he truly is, even after all these years. Thanks for the free Dr. Pepper…and my new jams!

Christina Aguilera has been taking some heat since she switched up her look. The new platinum blonde hairdo with heavy fringe has people comparing her to pop neophyte, Lady Gaga. Christina has been fighting back like Kenley from Project Runway, by playing dumb. Now the gloves are off and the battle of the bitches is on, but we know if these two kids could see how much they have in common, besides bangs, they could be BFFs for life…or at least do a duet.  So, here’s how they stack up…

So, so, so hard to tell. [London, 10/14/08]

True friends understand you best and offer a solution or just a strong shoulder when life is at its worst. And they’re usually the first to celebrate with you when life is wonderful. But unfortunately, most songs are about trials of the heart not friendship. So we put together a list of our favorite friendship songs. After reading through the lyrics, call up your best homegirl and let us know in the comments which songs remind you of her.

Gonna be honest. Xtina’s mammaries totally scare us. Mommy is that going to happen to us? [New York City, 9/02/08]

The hit song of the summer, I Kissed A Girl by Katy Perry, is the soundtrack for a new sexual revolution. From co-ed LUG’s to Hollywood’s hottest stars, girl-on-girl action is steaming up the streets and screens across the U.S. What publicly started with Madonna kissing Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera at the Video Music Awards in 2003, has grown into a full-on, leggings-style TREND.

Buttons make every outfit cuter!  And now they can just work their magic on you—whether or not you’re a bitch who can stitch. From White Trash Charms’ Fancy Pants Collection comes the most explicitly adorable “Cute As A Button” necklace.  The trinket is made in both gold and silver and has been seen strung on the not-so-button-up likes of Hilary Duff and Christina Aguilera. They’re sew cool! [$125-$135, WhiteTrashCharms.com]

This is sort of an old clip, from an episode of Saturday Night Live around the time that Sex and the City went off the air, but I was out to dinner with friends last night and a huge group of them hadn’t seen it—and neither had our Catherine. In the clip, which I swear is one of the best in SNL‘s history, Christina Aguilera does a dead-on impression of SATC‘s Samantha. Girlfriend could be an actress, I swear.