One of the worst things about normal sweaters is that they cover up the glistening, hairy man chests that the world deserves to see. Firebox’s “70s Hairy Chest Sweater” solves that problem in truly horrifying style, with a printed image of a naked torso, complete with shiny belly hair and a gaudy necklace. This polyester nightmare can be yours for just $61! But really, please don’t buy this. [Laughing Squid]
I guess sometimes men get bored and think it’s a good idea to style their chest hair. Guys, this is a really bad idea, especially if you ever want to get laid again. Click through to see some of the most ill-advised manscaping of all time.
“Julia [Roberts] had a line about how smooth my chest is … and it’s not. So the producers were like, ‘Okay, just shave him.’ And I was like, ‘Whoa. I spent 25 years earning this chest hair. I’m wearing purple tights and a codpiece, so, please, let me keep my manhood.’”
—Armie Hammer tells Details magazine how non-enthused he was about shaving his chest for the role of Prince Charming in “The Brothers Grimm: Snow White.” Here’s hoping that he won this battle and got a line rewrite. [Details] Keep reading »
On the last episode of “Tough Love Couples,” everyone had to dress up like their partner’s fantasy and a bunch of the ladies asked their men to get their chests waxed. Why, oh why?! It’s a serious crime against nature to strip a dude! Waxing it off isn’t just painful physically; it places hairlessness on a pedestal that creates an image of men just as ridiculous as those pin-thin models we ladies gripe about.
I tell you, deforestation of men has become a growing problem. With all these uber-manscaped models and Hollywood types badgering dudekind to get waxed, a man with chest hair is practically an endangered species. If “Captain Planet” were still on the air, there’d be Planeteers looking out for earth, fire, wind, water, heart, and chest hair! The Art Of Manliness gurus agree that we have to protect it. Men and women of the world, I’m going to need your help to stop this crime against mankind and hotness. Keep reading »
They say everything old is new again and that’s not just for leg warmers and neon … male chest hair is back from the ’70s with a vengeance! (The cutesy term for chest hair is “heavage,” but that sounds like what happened after I drank four shots of vodka for the first time.) The popularity of deep V-necks and scoop-neck tops in men’s fashion is to blame, apparently, and the Wall Street Journal says these clothes plus tufts of man fur offer “blatantly sexual … studly swagger.” Keep reading »
Sixty-something Sex Bomb Tom Jones has taken out a whopping $7 million insurance policy on his chest hair. While weâ€™re not sure if that includes the trail that leads to the Golden Girls‘ promise land, we are sure that it is a waste of money. Whatâ€™s he afraid of — a waxident? The insurance company, Lloydâ€™s of London, is also known for covering J.Loâ€™s booty, Heidi Klumâ€™s legs, and Keith Richardâ€™s fingers, so they were happy to add Tom and the handful of hair that entertains crowds in Las Vegas. Although, perhaps at his age, the pelvis-thrusting crooner would have been better off getting insurance to cover a cougar attack. [World Of Wonder] Keep reading »